


(Your) Mess Is Mine

by cloudcat29



Category: Cricket RPF
Genre: Bulimia, Eating Disorders, Established Relationship, Family Feels, Fluff and Angst, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Non-Explicit Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-10
Updated: 2019-07-30
Packaged: 2020-03-07 10:15:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 52,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18871159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cloudcat29/pseuds/cloudcat29
Summary: Being dropped from a team is hard. Being dropped from a team after you're made vice-captain is harder. Being dropped from a team where your boyfriend is doing so unbelievably well, making you inadequate however, is probably the hardest of all.





	1. About 15,000 Kilometres Away

**Author's Note:**

> The likelihood of any of this being true is extremely slim. Much of it is a figure of my overactive imagination. May contain some triggering points so read with caution.

"... and it was probably the most rewarding experience of the year to date." Pat finished.

"hmm" Mitch mumbled in reply.

He wasn't bored, he truly wasn't, but listening to what had to have been a ten minute monologue about how wonderful and rewarding visiting Gallipoli and the lead up to the World Cup had been was starting to test his patience. Mitch loved talking to Pat, more than most things, they could talk for hours about silkworm harvesting if they wanted to, but there was a limit, and talking about all the great experiences Pat was having with the team without him, was reaching that limit. And it's not like he wasn't happy that Pat was getting to have these experiences, because he was ecstatic, elated even, but Pat having these experiences with the team that only nine months ago Mitch was being named vice-captain of and now barely ever got selected to play in was hitting a nerve. Sure, there had been that one ODI series, but ending up in hospital with gastritis and not being able to play was hardly what he considered to be a successful campaign. Granted, Pat had stayed with him for the majority of the time he was in hospital, only leaving when the nurses basically threatened to call security and have him escorted off the premises, and while it was only for two days it was probably the sweetest thing anyone had ever done for him, so did why on earth was he feeling so resentful towards one of the kindest people he knew?

"Mitch?" Pat asked, dragging him from his daze of thoughts to look at the slightly concerned face of his boyfriend through the computer screen. "Are you okay?" he followed.

"Yeah i'm fine, just didn't get a whole lot of sleep last night."

"You should really try to go to bed earlier you know, it would help with your whole lack of sleep problem."

Pat had said this in the most kind and helpful tone that was humanly possible and had become second nature to him, but something in Mitch had finally snapped.

"Well you see that would be the simple solution, but not everything can be daisies and unicorns Pat, some things are ten times harder than what they seem and what would be the simple solution to a problem isn't always something that people can do at the drop of a fucking hat!" Mitch shouted, louder than usual and what he should have.

"I, I need to go, training and stuff, but we'll talk later, tomorrow or something." The look on Pat's face said it all, it was a look somewhere between confusion and sadness, and Mitch had caused it.

"Yeah okay, I guess i'll talk to you then."

"Love you."

"Love you too."

And with that the call was disconnected and Mitch's laptop closed. He didn't want to yell at Pat, he never did, in their entire two year relationship he could count the number of times they had yelled at each other on one hand and only remembered two serious fights. This time though, the words just came out, he definitely could have controlled the way they were said, but in that moment the anger possessed him and a stream of words followed. He didn't even really know if he was angry at Pat, who, by no fault of his own, was playing so incredibly well that the selectors had no choice but to pick him in a move which they no doubt hoped would lead Australia to victory. And Mitch wanted that, he really did, but while Pat was off conquering the world of cricket, Mitch was in Perth, currently living with his sister in law and his nephew and niece who was a screaming newborn, a factor which was no doubt contributing to his lack of sleep. He loved living with his brother and his family, and Bec had been great while Pat and Shaun were away, but what Mitch really wanted was to be playing cricket with Pat, to be going to sleep beside him and waking up in the same position, and no amount of love and support from his family was going to change the fact that it wasn't going to happen any time soon. Mitch sighed, and deciding that his time could probably be better spent than sitting in his room regretting his actions, went out to the living room. He plumped himself on the sofa and was immediately met with the sound of his phone buzzing.

_Just saw Pat looking like he was about to cry, like seriously cry Mitch. What on earth happened between you two???!!!_

Mitch probably should have expected that message, Shaun didn't exactly shy away from pointing out when Mitch had screwed up, and this was well and truly one of those moments. As if right on queue Bec walked over from the Kitchen, baby in tow, and sat down right next to Mitch.

"So I heard the yelling."

"You did?"

"I did, so did Austin, he learnt a new word from it, couldn't wait to tell daddy when he called."

"I am so sorry Bec."

"Forget about it." she said whilst simultaneously getting up from the sofa and taking Mabel to the cot on the other side of the room. "I told him that he shouldn't copy what you say all the time because some of it's silly and that daddy wouldn't want a silly boy."

"Still, I shouldn't have said it, or yelled it..."

"Wanna tell me what this fight was about?" Bec said while she was resuming her place on the sofa next to Mitch, taking the blanket which had been a present from Pat on their first anniversary and covering the two of them with it.

"It wasn't a fight." Mitch responded sternly.

"Okay then, what was the impromptu yelling exhibition I just heard about?"

"He told me that I should go to bed earlier." To this Bec looked confused, so Mitch continued.

"After he had spent at least ten minutes talking about how great Gallipoli was, and how wonderful the hotel in London was, and how great the World Cup was going to be."

"Oh."

"Yeah, he didn't even let me get a word in the whole time he was talking. It's like he completely forgot that I wasn't there with him, that I was on the other side of the world, living with my brother's wife." After a few moments he continued. "Sorry, you know I love you and the kids."

"But sometimes you wish you were there with Pat, doing everything he's talking about, it's okay I get it."

"I really do, I mean don't get me wrong, I love the fact that he's doing so well at the moment and after all the injuries he's had he deserves it, but it's like he's out there leading the team to victory, and I can't even get a Cricket Australia contract."

"You will get your form back Mitch and you're too talented for the selectors to keep you out of the team forever, but have you actually spoken to Pat about how you're feeling?"

"No. And you can't either Bec, I mean it, don't go talking to Shaun about this because we both know that he'll go and blab to Pat who will entirely blame himself when it's not his fault."

"Okay, okay, but you can't keep having impromptu yelling exhibitions over facetime, because that isn't fair on either of you."

"I know, I know, no more yelling, i'll just keep being as happy and positive as Pat somehow manages to always be, the supportive boyfriend.

"Mitch." Bec spoke slowly, "You do know you're more than a trophy boyfriend right?"

"Yeah well at the moment it doesn't feel like that, count me out for dinner i'm really not that hungry."

And with that Mitch got off the sofa and retreated to his room, where, without bothering to change out of his clothes, he plonked on his bed. After a minute or two, he moved to place himself under the blankets, not before removing his phone from his pocket and typing a reply to Shaun's earlier message,

_Don't worry about Pat, i'll sort it out later, after we've both had time to cool down._

Once sent, Mitch turned off the phone and placed it on the bedside table, moving back onto the pillow he closed his eyes and allowed himself to drift into the peaceful slumber of sleep.

***

Shaun put his phone back in his pocket, knowing in all likelihood he wasn't going to get a reply from Mitch any time soon. He didn't mean to meddle, but when Pat told him he was going to talk to Mitch on facetime and emerged from his room half an hour later on the brink of tears, what was Shaun supposed to do. Pat and Mitch barely ever fought, it was actually kind of freaky how sickly sweet and adorable they were around each other. On one of Pat's many visits to Perth they had spent what had to have been four hours in each others arms on the sofa, wrapped in a blanket and completely disregarding the movie playing and Bec and Shaun, who themselves were in the room. Shaun didn't know what had happened, but he intended to figure out what it was and why it was bothering Pat so much. Making his way down to the front of the hotel where outside the team bus was waiting to take them to training, he spotted Pat in the reception area hovering around some of the others in the team.

"So how was the chat with my darling brother?" Shaun had asked while walking up behind Pat, figuring that he would know what he was talking about, he was however, not expecting the sheer look of confusion that graced Pat's face as he turned around.

"Huh?" Pat replied with a distinct lack of enthusiasm, something must have really gotten to him.

"You told me that you were going to talk to Mitch before training, how did it go?"

"Yeah fine, it was fine, much the same as it normally is."

"Oh come on Pat, I saw you when you were coming out of the room, if it was fine then you wouldn't have been on the verge of tears."

"Who said I was, for all you know it could have been hay fever."

"Again, I saw you, and what I saw was certainly not a man suffering from hay fever. You don't even get hay fever."

"Because you know so much about my medical situation don't you."

"Pat, you practically live at my house, if you suffered from hay fever, I think I would have noticed."

"Okay, I do not practically live at your house, i’m barely even there for more than a week at a time."

"You have your own shelf in the bathroom."

Pat opened his mouth to respond but at that exact point the rest of the team arrived with the coaches and everyone proceeded towards the bus. It was at least a twenty minute drive from the hotel to the ground depending on traffic giving Shaun the perfect opportunity to find out what had happened to make Pat so upset. That plan however hit a major roadblock when Shaun entered the bus and found Pat sitting next to Mitch Starc, but that was hardly going to stop him.

"Mitch move." Shaun stated bluntly.

"Well hello to you too, why exactly do I have to move?" Mitch responded.

"You don't." Pat said just as sternly as Shaun had spoken.

"Shaun?" Mitch questioned, a rather confused look now appearing on his face.

"Technically no, you don't have to move, but don't you have to call Josh?"

"Yeah I do actually." And with that Mitch stood up and began to move into the aisle.

"Mitch you really don't have to move, it's fine, Shaun can sit in one of the many available seats remaining on the bus." Pat glared at Shaun as he said this.

"I do really need to call Josh, we haven't actually spoken since last night and when we did it sounded like boredom was well and truly taking over, I mean who ever knew that not being able to do something for months would be such a problem? We can talk later though, bus back to the hotel?"

"Yeah sure." Pat replied in a rather nonchalant manner. 

And with that Mitch smiled and made his way up to the front of the bus, pulling out his phone and dialling on the way. Wasting no time, Shaun took the available seat next to Pat and proceeded to look at him.

"I've already told you Shaun, I wasn't crying, and the chat with Mitch was the same as they usually are."

"Pat, you're basically my brother in law, and I have spent enough time with you to know when something isn't right, and something isn't right, I mean you and Mitch hardly ever fight-"

"It wasn't a fight!" Pat quickly interrupted,

"Fight or not, something obviously happened, and whether you want to or not, you should really talk about it, and at the moment, i'm as good as anyone."

Pat sighed and rested his head in his hands before taking a breath and looking back at Shaun.

"I was telling him about the trip to Gallipoli and how it was such a rewarding experience and how I learnt so much from it." Shaun nodded. "Then that kind of turned into me telling him how amazing the hotel we're staying at is and how great London is in general and how excited I was for the World Cup to start."

"Then he kind of looked out of it, like he wasn't actually with the conversation so I asked if he was okay and he said he was just tired, that he didn't get much sleep. So I told him that he should go to bed earlier, that it would help, and he just snapped at me, told me that not everything can be solved by the simple solution. We had training though so I just said we would talk tomorrow and then he ended the call."

Shaun shook his head, laughing softly, "So basically, you were telling him what an amazing time you were having?" Pat nodded. "With all your friends and teammates in a city that's about 15,000 kilometres away?" Pat nodded again though slightly more conservatively. "Without Mitch?"

And that's when it hit Pat, while he was having these amazing experiences with his mates, Mitch wasn't. Mitch was back in Perth, living with Bec and two kids, one of which was a newborn.

"I talked for ten minutes straight about what an amazing time I was having here, I didn't even let Mitch say anything, what sort of a horrible boyfriend am I that I can't even see how hard this must be for him, I mean he just lost his Cricket Australia contract!" Pat let his head fall into his hands again and loudly sighed.

"Look Pat, you really aren't a horrible boyfriend, trust me, I've seen just how great of a boyfriend you are, you just got swept up in the excitement of things and your brain turned off for a moment."

"Yeah, making me a horrible boyfriend."

"If you were a horrible boyfriend, then you wouldn't have spent a ridiculous amount of time at the hospital when Mitch was stuck there with gastritis. I mean, didn't you get escorted off the hospital grounds by security you stayed that long?"

"I didn't get escorted off the grounds, the nurses threatened to call security if I didn't leave of my own accord, which, after Mitch threatened to slap me if I didn't, I did."

"The fact that it took two threats to actually make you leave the room really speaks for itself, but if you were looking for another example about what a wonderful boyfriend you are, what about the time Mitch had to go in for that surgery on his groin? You were so worried you basically had already packed your bags and on the next flight home from India before the phone call had even finished. And then when Mitch finally convinced you to stay you spent most of the time on facetime with him, that is, when you weren't sending unhealthy amounts of flowers and..."

Shaun didn’t need to tell him about that day, Pat remembered it very well.

**About three months ago**

"What do you mean you need surgery?" Pat said in a rather worried tone, completely forgetting the fact that he was supposed to be training with the team.

"They said they don't know why i'm still in so much pain, so they want to see exactly what's wrong, I think they said something about a ruptured testicle." Mitch had replied in a manner far too calm for Pat's liking.

"And they can't tell that through an X-ray, or some kind of scan, ultrasound maybe?"

"They did that already, nothing showed up, surgery is just the logical next step."

"The fact that you used the words surgery and logical in the same sentence make me concerned for your state of mind, I mean what drugs exactly have they got you on?"

"How would I know? I'm presuming the strong ones."

"You can't let them do the surgery Mitch, so many things could go wrong."

"Sweetheart, are you worried my balls won't work after?" Mitch said in a rather condescending tone.

"I was more concerned about the possibility that you could have a reaction to the anaesthetic, go into cardiac arrest and die, but now that you mention it, there is the distinct possibility that you could have defective balls after this surgery yes."

"Don't worry Patrick, i'm almost certain that after the surgery we can still have amazing sex." Mitch laughed, although Pat wasn't exactly sure why.

"It's not just the risks Mitch, i'm in India, I won't be able to be there with you when you go in, or get out, and I won't be able to look after you when it's all done, maybe I should just come home, give me an hour to tell Justin and pack my stuff and then i'll be on the next flight to Perth."

"Pat, you're not coming home, you are staying in India and you are going to play."

"Don't you want me to be there?"

"Of course I do but it's not like i'm alone, Shaun and Bec are both here, they're literally outside the door bribing Austin with a milkshake."

"I know that that's supposed to make me feel better but are you forgetting that Bec could literally have a kid at any moment?"

"No I hadn't, but she's in the right place if that happens isn't she? And Austin can keep me company if that possibility occurs so I won't be alone, I really will be fine Pat, you don't need to worry."

"I know I don't, I just, I think I should be there, you know the whole supportive boyfriend routine, fluffing pillows, hassling nurses, stuff like that."

"I think that role has already been filled, Bec keeps fluffing my pillows and making sure i'm comfortable, Austin gave me his stuffed dinosaur to keep me company and Shaun's already threatened two nurses and a doctor."

"I know that that should surprise me, the threatening thing, but it really doesn't, I guess because I've witnessed it first hand."

"Hold up, Shaun threatened you, when?"

"When we first got together, went along the lines of 'if you ever hurt my brother you won't have hands to bowl with'."

"Right then, well as much as I don't want to, we have to end this conversation, the people are here the prep me for the surgery."

"Okay then, you'll call me when the surgery's over right, like not right after it, but when you feel up to it?"

"You know I will Pat."

"I love you Mitch."

"I love you too Pat."

**Present Day**

"...and the amount of times you told him you love him, I wanted to vomit most of the time. Pat, you with me?" Shaun asked realising that Pat was in a world of his own.

"Yeah." Pat replied unconvincingly.

"My point is, that if you were a horrible boyfriend you wouldn't have done all the things you did, it's honestly ridiculous how much you care for Mitch and just because you got lost in the experience you were having here, doesn't make you the worst person in the world."

"Yeah, I guess you're right, thanks Shaun, but you really didn't need to talk to me about this, I know it's probably weird Mitch being your brother and all."

"What's family for? But Pat?"

"Yeah?"

"You know that you can talk to me any time during the next couple of months right, about anything."

"Really? Even the incredibly rumbustious, passionate sex?" Pat laughed.

"I'm not even going to dignify that with a response." 

"Thanks Shaun."

Shaun just smiled and the stopping of the bus signalled they were at the training ground. Training was a rampant success, Pat managed to put his moment with Mitch out of his head and even bowled the ball that hit some poor woman's car. Hours passed and soon the team was boarding the bus to take them back to the hotel. Shaun sat somewhere near the front and took his long forgotten phone out of his bag and saw a message from Mitch telling him that he would sort things with Pat and not to worry, but Shaun would always worry, Mitch was his little brother it was his job. Just as the bus was driving away from the ground Shaun's phone lit up again, this time signalling a call from Bec.

"Hey sweets, what's up?"

"We may have a problem with Mitch."


	2. Distractions

"What do you mean we may have a problem with Mitch, what sort of problem?" Shaun said, making sure he kept his voice reasonably quiet so everyone wouldn't overhear.

"He wasn't himself Shaun, he was really down and negative."

"Well wouldn't you be if you had barely played all summer, and it doesn't help that he's gonna be away from Pat for so long.”

"Yeah I guess, but you didn't see him, he thinks he's a trophy boyfriend."

"He has way too much talent to be a trophy boyfriend, he's just going through a rough patch, everyone has them."

"I tried to tell him that but he wouldn't listen, it's like last time Shaun."

"Bec, this is nothing like last time, has he even shown any of the signs?"

"He skipped dinner."

"That doesn't really prove anything people skip dinner all the time, and you can't use your guilt over not noticing anything last time as an excuse to hunt for signs that it might be happening again."

"You don't feel guilty? Mitch needed us but we were too wrapped up in our own little bubble to notice that something was seriously wrong!"

"Of course I feel guilty, I feel horrible that my little brother thought he couldn't come to us when he had a problem that big. But preoccupying on the past isn't going to help, we just have to trust that if there is a problem with Mitch he'll come to us, for now though we just need to keep going about our business and reassuring him when he needs it."

"I guess you're right, but I can't help but think that there might be something else going on with him."

"I know sweets, look I have to go the bus is pulling into the hotel, i'll talk to you later yeah."

"Okay, love you."

"Love you too."

After he hung up, Shaun put his phone in his pocket and started to walk off the bus. He proceeded towards his hotel room where he dumped his bags near the door and went over to his bed. Laying down and closing his eyes, what Bec said was stuck in his mind, he didn't exactly notice what was happening with Mitch last time, so why would things be any different now? And when he thought about it, there had been some serious signs, just little things that didn't add up, but when you put all those little things together, they formulated a big problem.

**Three years ago**

"Shaun!" Bec called from the kitchen.

"Yeah?" Shaun had replied emerging from the bedroom with their newly born son.

"Have you seen the cupcakes that I picked up from the bakery yesterday? I need to get things ready for this afternoon."

"I didn't eat them if that's what your implying."

"It wasn't, but do you know where they are? I wanted to have them set out before everyone gets here."

"I don't, but is it really that important? I mean it's only my family coming, one member of which lives in this house."

"I know that, but it's Austin's big introduction to the world and I really wanted it to be perfect."

"And cupcakes that he can't even eat are a crucial part of this introduction?"

"It doesn't matter that he can't eat them, they were really well decorated and make the table look better."

"Right, well I don't know what happened to them, are you sure you actually picked them up?"

"Yes, I am sure that I picked them up, why would I say I did if I didn't!"

"Baby brain."

"Not pregnant any more, doesn't count."

"Maybe not, but having a newborn adds a whole lot of stress, all i'm saying is that it would be easy to forget."

"Well I didn't." Bec said sternly whilst picking up an empty chip packet and walking to put it in the bin. As she opened the bin her face changed.

"You said you didn't eat them!" She said in a rather loud and somewhat angry voice.

"I didn't eat them."

"Then why are the wrappers of the cupcakes, all twelve of them, in the bin?" Bec said as Shaun glanced over to look at the wrappers in the bin.

"Bec, I swear that I have no idea how those got there."

"You're the only other person that knew they were there Shaun, and I know you, you see something sweet and you just have to have it, you can't help yourself."

Before Shaun had the opportunity to reply the sound of the toilet flushing echoed around the house and Mitch walked out into the living room.

"You do know that you speak really loudly considering there's a baby in the house." Mitch said as he walked over to Bec and Shaun.

"Well I wouldn't have to speak loudly if your brother didn't eat all the cupcakes, which I might add I ordered three weeks ago."

"Why on earth would I eat twelve cupcakes at once Bec?"

"Self control issues, and don't even try to deny that you have any because- Mitch are you okay?" Bec trailed off once she saw Mitch.

"Yeah course I am, why wouldn't I be?"

"You look really pale, you're not getting sick are you?"

"Don't think so."

"You look like you're about to faint, maybe you should go and sit down, i'll bring you tea."

"Having Austin has really turned you into a mother hen, you do know that?"

Bec just laughed and Mitch went to sit in the living room, while she went to turn the kettle on Bec picked up the keys and turned to Shaun, taking Austin from him and placing the keys in his hand she said,

"You, darling husband, can go to Coles and buy a mud cake for this afternoon."

"Sure, but you know that it really wasn't me who ate them right?"

"All I can say is that I hope they tasted nice because now, your son's introduction to the family will not be the perfect event I had planned, in fact, maybe you should pick up some paper plates and cups as well, hell forget the cups, we'll just drink out of the bottle." And with that remark, Bec turned to focus her attention on the boiling kettle and Shaun left the house.

**Present Day**

That was probably one of the first signs that Shaun and Bec had missed. Having twelve cupcakes disappear was a bit odd and even though Shaun knew for certain that he didn't eat them, there was a newborn in the house, and it was easier to let Bec be angry and blame him than continuously deny the accusations and add extra stress. He was eventually dragged from his thoughts by a rather persistent knock at the door which he opened to reveal Mitch Starc who swiftly went on to say,

"You are aware that you were supposed to be at the team meeting ten minutes ago."

"Shit!" Shaun replied as he realised the time, grabbed a jumper on the way out of his room and went to walk with Mitch to the meeting.

"So what had you so deep in thought that you forgot about the meeting?" Mitch asked curiously.

"Nothing much, just something Bec told me when we were talking earlier."

"Ohhhh, trouble in paradise?"

"Nah, she's just worried about something back home wanted to tell me about it in case I knew what to do."

"And do you?"

"I'm not really sure there is a problem, but you know I wasn't last time either."

"Last time?"

"Just something that happened years ago, it's not a problem now, at least I don't think it is, Bec however is convinced that history is repeating itself. Anyway that isn't really something for you to worry about, how was your phone call with Josh earlier?"

"Non eventful. It was basically him just telling me how bored he was at home and how he wishes he was here, and then me telling him that as much as I wished he was here too, he needs to get himself fit and healthy."

"That sounds kind of weirdly sweet."

"You reckon? I like to consider myself a patient person, but him constantly telling me how bored he is, you know he nearly bought a rabbit."

"A rabbit?"

"Yep, thought that he could teach it agility to keep his mind occupied and win us money in some competition he found online."

"That man needs cricket."

"He really does, i'm half convinced that when he comes over here I am going to be told that we now breed exotic cats or that we have a dog he trained to hunt for truffles."

"Well, if you do now breed cats, Austin has been hampering me and Bec to let him get a pet."

"I will keep that in mind." Mitch said just as they were arriving at the meeting room, Shaun walked in the door and while apologising for being late took his seat and began to focus on the plan being explained for their first warm up match.

***

Mitch had been awake for an hour, his mind alive and racing with thoughts, mainly of Pat and their current situation. He shouldn't have yelled, that was clear in his mind, and if Shaun was right and Pat had been crying then he was definitely in contention for worst boyfriend of the year, but Mitch was struggling. He wasn't coping, with anything, he wasn't coping with Pat being on the other side of the world and he wasn't coping with not playing. They had talked about the World Cup for the past year, about how they were going to go through the highs and lows together, ride the wave, but the stark reality was that it wasn't going to happen. Part of the problem may have been that Pat was doing well, unbelievably well, career best form and Mitch wasn't jealous, he was more upset, upset that he wouldn't get to share all Pat's triumphs with him, yes he was going to be there in a couple of weeks time, but he would be on the sideline, and that hurt. It hurt because when Mitch had been doing well Pat had been there for everything, he had been at every training session and every team meeting, he hadn't just been cheering on from the sideline.

Mitch needed to get up, he needed to do something to keep busy, he needed something to keep his mind off the entire situation he had going on. Sitting up and throwing his legs over the side of his bed in preparation to stand, he stretched his back before walking over to his dresser on the other side of the room. Opening the top one he pulled out a pair of socks and dislodged an envelope that was wedged between the front of the drawer and the remainder of his socks, he opened the envelope to reveal a card and as he opened it he saw Pat's rather messy handwriting.

**Eighteen months ago**

Mitch woke up from what had been a rather peaceful sleep and was still in shock, only yesterday Australia had reclaimed the Ashes after only three tests, and it felt amazing. As he went to stretch out he noticed a rather large absence beside him. Pat had snuck into his room late last night like a horny teenager wanting to celebrate privately with Mitch. This morning however, Pat was not lying next to him on the rather large bed, he was, Mitch noticed, after a quick scan of the room, sitting at the small table in the corner tapping a pen against it.

"What are you doing?" Mitch asked startling Pat.

"No, nothing, nothing, I thought you were still asleep." he replied.

"I was, now i'm not, what are you doing?"

"You're quite persistent aren't you."

"I have been told that once or twice in my life, what are you doing?"

"It's really nothing." Pat said whilst moving over to the bed and softly kissing Mitch. "Good morning."

"It is now." Mitch hummed. "What's that in your hand?"

"Nothing."

"It's an envelope, and it looks like it says Mitch, is it for me?"

"No, i'm writing love letters for Mitch Starc, was just about to deliver it." Pat deadpanned.

"Brave man, you'd better hope Josh doesn't find out."

"Oh trust me," Pat leaned in, "He won't." he continued seductively.

Mitch laughed, "So is the thing for me?"

Pat sighed, "It's really stupid, trust me."

"I think I can be the judge of that, give it." Mitch reached out but Pat pulled away.

"Look you really don't want to read it, it's just a stupid card telling you how proud I am of what you did this test."

"That's not stupid, it's sweet, can I have it now?" Pat hesitated, but eventually handed the envelope to Mitch who read it intently.

"To my darling Mitchell," Mitch started reading aloud.

"No Mitch don't!" Pat said reaching for the card as quickly as Mitch pulled it away and continued,

"Words can't accurately describe how proud I am of what you did this test." Pat was visibly blushing now.

"You did so amazingly well and proved to everyone just how great you are." Mitch continued on and Pat's blush deepened. 

"Seeing you out in the middle ignoring what everyone had said and batting with such purpose reinforced why and just how much I love you and I hope that we have many more matches like this one together." Pat's face was now being buried under the pillow he was holding to it.

"All my love Patrick." Mitch finished but Pat kept the pillow to his face making Mitch chuckle slightly.

"That is one of the sweetest things anyone has ever written for me." Mitch said removing the pillow from Pat's face. "Thank you." he said leaning in to softly kiss his rather embarrassed boyfriend.

"Yeah well that doesn't mean that you had to read it out loud for me to hear."

"I'm going to put this in my sock drawer at home."

"Why your sock drawer?"

"People won't look in there, if we get burgled it won't be taken."

"Smart, I think." Pat said whilst laying back on the bed, prompting Mitch to do the same. "You know I mean it, I really do hope that we can have heaps more matches like that one, together."

"We can." Mitch smiled. "The World Cup isn't that far away and after we've finished dominating that, we can dominate the Ashes."

"Together?"

"Together."

"You know... I can think of a couple of other things we can do together..." Pat said manoeuvring himself so he was straddling Mitch's hips.

"Can you just?" Mitch replied whilst leaning in to kiss Pat.

After a few minutes the kiss began to deepen and there was little doubt between the two of them as to where the situation was leading, until a rather loud knock at the door interrupted.

"Fuck." Pat said quietly and rather panicky.

"Who is it?" Mitch called.

"The male role model who taught you most of what you know today." the reply came.

"Muhammad Ali?"

"Fuck off Mitch." Shaun said whilst barging into the room using the key which Mitch didn't remember giving him, "Oh fuck!" Shaun said upon seeing Pat and Mitch on the bed, Pat still on top, "You two really should be more careful." he continued turning around to face the door he had just come through.

"We weren't exactly expecting an audience." Mitch said as Pat moved off him and onto the empty side of the bed.

"You're just lucky I wasn't Steve." Shaun spoke as he turned back around and faced the two of them.

"Because he's so innocent isn't he." Mitch responded in a snarky tone. "How did you get a key to my room?"

"Swiped it from your bag yesterday."

"Why?"

"So I could bring you coffee, wasn't expecting to need three." Shaun said glancing at Pat who swiftly said,

"I should get back to my room anyway." gathering his things he continued, "See you on the bus?"

"Yeah." Mitch replied with a smile, "Love you."

"Love you too." Pat countered as he left the room, shutting the door, Mitch turned back to Shaun,

"Why did you knock if you had a key?"

"The distinct possibility that you two love birds may be doing what I nearly caught you doing." Shaun laughed and Mitch just dropped his head, tightly holding the card Pat had given him and accepting the coffee Shaun had brought him.

**Present Day**

That card reinforced just how supportive Pat had been when Mitch was playing the best he ever had, no matter how he was doing, he always made an effort to make Mitch see just how great he was. And what was Mitch doing when Pat was playing incredibly? Yelling at him, yelling when he was only trying to tell him how great things were going and how the World Cup was everything they dreamed it would be. Pat didn't deserve that, not when he was having the experience of a lifetime and probably didn't even realise that he was telling Mitch how amazing things were without him. Mitch gently placed the envelope back into it's position in the drawer and after grabbing the clothes he needed walked back to his bed and sat down before hearing his door softly open and seeing Bec standing outside with her head poking through,

"Do you wanna come shopping with me today, mum and dad are looking after the kids and we really need groceries." Mitch looked at her knowing that there had to be more to her offer than groceries, "And I saw a really pretty dress in the window of a shop that I want and could use your opinion on."

"Yeah course i'll come, can't guarantee my opinion will be any good though." Mitch laughed and smiled at Bec as she smiled back at him.

"Cool, so leave in half an hour?"

"Yep, fine by me."

The door closed and Mitch continued to smile. Shopping with Bec was always an experience, usually a good one, and it would be a good distraction from everything going on in his life at the moment. Mitch got up from his position on the bed and continued to get dressed before grabbing his wallet off his bedside table and walking out to the living room to meet Bec.

***

Pat was never really one to complain about team meetings, he went, he listened and he was focused on what was being discussed. Today however, his focus could not be further from the bowling tactics that were being talked about by the coaching staff, his focus was on Mitch, on their last conversation, on what both of them had said. The meeting just kept dragging on and after what felt like seven hours, though a quick look at his watch revealed it had only been two, it finally ended, and Pat was free to go back to his room and wallow alone. His plan was briefly halted however when he nearly crashed face first into Mitch Starc, who was clearly a million miles away.

"Whoa Mitch watch where you're going." Pat said and Mitch snapped from his daze.

"Sorry Patty, wasn't really with it."

"You don't say, what's up?"

"Haven't been sleeping that much this past week."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, it may be the fact that i'm the worst person in the entirety of the human race."

"That's a rather drastic conclusion to come to."

"Is it really that drastic if it's the truth?"

"Mind me asking how exactly you are the worst person alive?"

"I left my boyfriend, my injured boyfriend, alone in Sydney and came over to England, to play in a World Cup."

"So the real reason you can't sleep is a lethal combination of loneliness and guilt?"

"No. Maybe. Probably. I don't know." Mitch brought his hands to his head.

"You really miss him don't you?"

"Never been on the opposite side of the world from him put it that way."

"It will get better."

"I doubt that."

"Well, if it's any consolation, you aren't the only member of the worlds worst person club."

"What did you do? Mitch isn't injured, and he lives with Bec and Shaun, so he isn't alone."

"No he isn't, but I did spend a solid ten minutes talking about how great it was here and what a wonderful time I was having without him."

"Well then, welcome to the club."

"Yeah, well I want to call him but I don't think that would go over well."

"Why not?"

"It's two in the morning in Perth."

"Right, time difference." Mitch ran his hands over his face before speaking again, "You know what we need?"

"Alcohol?"

"No. Well yes but i'm not sure how well that would be received by the coaches. No we need a distraction."

"A distraction?"

"A distraction."

"Are you sure that's the wisest idea?"

"Why wouldn't it be, we're both upset and the likelihood of me sleeping is slim to none."

"The warm up match we have to play tomorrow."

"Warm up match, shwarm up match."

"That's the attitude."

"It's not like I was suggesting we go to an underground dance party, more like a quiet night in playing scrabble."

"You brought scrabble?"

"Not exactly."

"How can you not exactly bring a board game with you?"

"Well I didn't bring it, I found it, in the cupboard under the sink in my room."

"There wasn't any board game under my sink."

"That's why I said not exactly."

"Okay then, well I guess I could spare a couple of hours. Wait, you're not one of those people who gets super over competitive and makes up your own words are you?"

"Last time I played with Josh he made me sleep on the couch."

"Seriously?"

"Yep."

"Is it too late to change my answer?"

"It is indeed Patrick, it is indeed."

Mitch wrapped his arm around Pat's shoulders and led them off towards his room. A distraction wouldn't be the worst thing in the world would it? Pat did need to stop thinking about the whole situation with his boyfriend and it seemed like Mitch really needed this. Yes a distraction was exactly what Pat needed.


	3. A Functional Conversation

Pat woke up the next morning and noticed that it was still dark outside, a quick look at his phone revealed that it was only just past five in the morning. Last night had been great and exactly what he needed to keep his mind off his brain fade when he was talking to Mitch last, he was however still questioning some of the words that had been thrown around during the game, smeat surely couldn't be an actual word, could it? It had certainly allowed him an understanding as to why Mitch had ended up on the couch last time he and Josh had played. But now it was morning, and the empty space next to him on the bed was making Pat remember just how much he missed Mitch. Calculating the time difference between London and Perth he realised that it would around midday over there and calling Mitch probably wouldn't be unreasonable, after all, he wasn't really expecting to get back to sleep. He scrolled through to find Mitch's contact information and clicked on the button to call, Mitch answered after three rings.

"Hey." Mitch said upon answering.

"Hey."

"Isn't it like five in the morning over there, why are you awake?"

"Woke up, couldn't get back to sleep, wanted to talk to you."

"Thank you for this high honour." Mitch laughed.

"You are truly welcome, hey quick question, is smeat a word?"

"Smeat? Can't say I've heard of it, why exactly do you need to know this?"

"I ended up playing scrabble with Mitch Starc last night."

"Right, so he cheated then."

"Either that or he genuinely thinks that smeat is a word. So what have you been up to?"

"Currently I am shopping with Bec."

"Shopping?"

"She said we needed groceries and that there was this one dress she wanted to buy, that was about two hours ago and we haven't actually entered Coles yet."

"Is it a nice dress at least?"

"Yeah it is actually, but now she's showing me lingerie options, like how am I supposed to know what would look better out of pink or purple lace?"

"Purple."

"Since when were you the expert on women's underwear?" Mitch questioned.

"I'm not, I just think that the purple would look better."

"You haven't even seen it Pat."

"So?"

"So, how are you supposed to offer a valid opinion without seeing the item?"

"Send me a photo then."

"You want me to send you a photo of my sister in law in her underwear?"

"That wasn't what I meant. So apart from shopping with Bec, how has Perth been?" Pat said in an attempt to redirect the conversation.

"Yeah good, not much ever happens here."

"That's not true, what about that time with the possums?"

"Pat, I hate to break it to you, but two possums having sex in a tree outside my bedroom window isn't exactly exciting breaking news material." Mitch laughed.

"Okay I guess you have a point there."

"Are you playing in the warm up match today?"

"Yeah."

"Promise you won't go hurting yourself?"

"I promise."

"I think Bec may be finally finished."

"Did she get the one with purple lace?"

"You and the purple lace. No she got the pink one."

"Damn, here I was thinking I could start a new career."

"What, advising women on what colour lace they should have on their lingerie?"

"You don't think it would suit me?"

Mitch laughed, "Look I have to go, I think we might finally get to Coles, i'll talk to you later?"

"Yeah, you will."

"Love you."

"Love you more."

Pat hung up the phone and felt all warm inside, conversations like that made him realise how lucky he was to have Mitch and how he wouldn't trade what he had for anything in the world. Pat looked at the time on his phone and noticed that it was already quarter to six, he should get dressed, he should pack his bag for the day, he should really do something productive before he had to be at breakfast in a little over an hour, but he didn't want to, he wanted to stay in bed all day and think about Mitch, because that was what Mitch did to him, he turned his heart to mush. Thinking about Mitch though was creating a rather undeniable situation in Pat's underwear. He shouldn't, he really shouldn't indulge in the situation, for two reasons, one he had to play today, granted it was only an unofficial warm up match but he still had to play, and two, anyone could hear him, anyone could knock on his door at anytime and he really didn't want to be put in the situation where he would have to explain why he was doing what he was doing to anyone. He couldn't stop thinking about Mitch though, and if he was being completely honest with himself he didn't exactly want to ignore the situation he currently had going on in his pants, fuck it, if he gets caught he gets caught, closing his eyes he allowed his hand to move underneath the waistband of his boxers and let out a quiet moan.

Pat sat at breakfast an hour later with a subtle smile on his face, he went about eating his food peacefully until he was disrupted by Mitch Starc sitting next to him,

"Is it safe to sit here or are you still pissed off about losing last night?" Mitch inquired with a rather condescending tone to his voice.

"I didn't lose, you cheated, smeat is not a word." 

"Oh and Namibia is?"

"It's a country in Africa Mitch." Pat stated whilst looking around the table for support from someone.

"He's right Mitch." Steve said and Pat smiled.

"Well then, you learn something new everyday don't you."

The conversation ended there and Pat went back to peacefully eating his breakfast. The smile he had supported since he left his room that morning remained on his face while they were boarding the bus and while he was sitting down. As the bus left the hotel and moved towards the ground Pat was still smiling and he knew that it was going to be a good day.

***

"Are you sure I made the right choice?" 

"Yes Bec." Mitch answered for the tenth time since they had been in the car.

"Why did I get the pink, Shaun doesn't even like pink, does he?"

"You're asking me about my brothers taste in lace?" Bec nodded, "I don't know Bec, what colour lace we preferred on our significant others underwear didn't really occupy a large number of our conversations when we were younger."

Bec sighed.

"If it's any help, Pat thinks you should have gotten the one with purple."

"So that's what that smile is about."

"What smile?"

"You get this particular smile every time you think about Pat, or talk about Pat, or see Pat. Shaun noticed it a couple of months back."

Mitch blushed, "Do I really?"

"Yep, and you've had it since we went into Coles. So you guys have talked then?"

"Yeah we did."

"I'm presuming that it went well."

"It really did."

"So no more impromptu yelling exhibitions?"

"Hope not."

"Good."

"Yeah, it is."

Mitch went quiet then but Bec knew it was only because he was thinking about Pat, the smile on his face gave everything away. Maybe she had been worried for nothing, maybe she had been using her guilt as an excuse to hunt for the signs that something may be wrong with Mitch again. Shaun was probably right, people skip dinner all the time, it didn't mean that Mitch was in trouble again, he was probably just stressed and upset about being away from Pat. After all, he seemed fine now, and Bec hadn't seen him this happy for a while.

**Nine months ago**

"Mitch! That's actually amazing!" Bec squealed, barely able to keep her excitement contained.

"Yeah, you deserve it bro." Shaun added on bringing Mitch into a hug.

"Thanks guys." Mitch smiled.

"So when do you get to start bossing people around?" Bec questioned, still with a rather large smile on her face.

"I don’t think that I do."

"Why not?"

"Because i'm only the co-vice captain." Mitch stated.

"Doesn't mean you can't boss people around."

"I think it does actually."

"Well it shouldn't, I can see you as a dictator of some regime."

"I still don't know why they picked me."

"Because you have talent and you work really hard." Bec said firmly.

"Still, why not just pick Josh, why both of us?"

"Can you stop questioning the decision they have made and roll with it. Now, does this promotion mean better plane seats when you have to travel?" Bec asked.

"It had better not!" Shaun spoke.

"I really don't know, but if it did would-"

Mitch was cut off by a rather persistent knock at the door.

"Is anyone expecting anyone?" Shaun question with a hint of frustration in his voice and Bec and Mitch shook their heads, "Then I say we leave it, it's probably those people trying to get us to change electricity companies again."

The knocking continued.

"Maybe you should just answer the door Shaun, they sound pretty keen." Mitch said with caution .

"They'll just keep coming back if we answer the door, they'll go away sooner rather than later if we ignore them."

After five minutes the knocking was still going.

"Okay that's it!" Bec said as she stormed out of the room and to the front door, "Oh, hey, come on in, in the kitchen."

"No Bec don't let them in the house!" Shaun started but when he saw who came around the corner he stopped and turned to Mitch who had his face buried in his phone.

"Um, Mitch," Bec started and Mitch looked up from his phone.

Mitch barely had time to take in the sight in front of him before a rather excited Pat was running towards him and jumping into his arms, wrapping his legs around Mitch's waist and arms around his neck. When Pat finally let go of Mitch, and stood before him running his hands down the front of his shirt to remove the creases, Mitch just looked at him and took a breath,

"What are you doing here?" he questioned quietly and in disbelief.

"What do you mean what am I doing here? You didn't think that the minute I found out you had been named co-vice captain of the Australian Test team I would get on a plane and come over here to be with you?"

Pat said this as if it were the most obvious response in the world, but in actuality, Perth was a fair way away from Sydney and Mitch wasn't expecting for Pat to fly the distance to see him, but now that he was here, Mitch did the one thing that felt the most natural, he leaned in and kissed his boyfriend. It was soft at first and then Pat started kissing back, Mitch brought his hands to Pat's hips and Pat wrapped his arms around Mitch's neck, they stayed like that for minutes.

"Do you think we should go?" Bec asked Shaun quietly noticing that Mitch and Pat had forgotten they were still in the room.

"I don't know, it's like one of those stupid movies you like to make me watch." Shaun answered.

"You mean romantic?"

"Watching my little brother being about ten minutes away from having sex in our kitchen isn't exactly what I would call romantic, but sure."

"Should we go somewhere?"

"Where?"

"We could go for afternoon tea."

"Do you even want afternoon tea? Besides Austin's sleeping we shouldn't really wake him."

"Austin has been asleep for two hours already, and it's either we wake him up and go out for afternoon tea, or we stay, and listen to whatever they're going to do in about ten minutes time." Bec said pointing to Mitch and Pat who were still kissing.

"I'll go and get the car ready." Shaun said as he was already walking out of the house, and after going to get Austin and leaving a note telling Mitch where they were going, Bec followed.

**Present Day**

That was the happiest Mitch had been since the Ashes and it made Bec smile to think that he could be getting back to a place where he could be like that again. As she pulled into their driveway, Bec looked over at Mitch who still had a rather large smile on his face as he was getting out of the car and going to get the groceries to take them inside the house. She quickly pulled her phone out of her bag and sent a text to Shaun,

_I think I was wrong about Mitch, you were right I was using my guilt to make sure I didn't miss signs that weren't there in the first place, he seems really happy. xx_

Bec smiled as she put her phone away and got out of the car to help the kids, everything was going to be fine.

***

Shaun boarded the bus with the rest of the team at the end of what had been a rather successful day in terms of preparation and took his seat in the middle of the bus. Even though they were only playing in an unofficial warm up match the day had been good, not out for 55 had Shaun pleased, it could have been better, but he was still pleased. As he watched the many buildings and trees pass by him out the bus window, he found it difficult not to fall asleep, he knew sleep was a fair while off however, with all the post match business to attend to, it was likely to be hours before he could actually lie down and rest. As the team bus pulled into the hotel Shaun disembarked with the others and made his way through reception.

The after match business took about as long as Shaun expected it to and by the time it had finished he could hear his bed calling for him. Walking through the halls of the hotel to get to his room and finally get to sleep, Shaun saw Pat and Mitch Starc, who he thought were way too energetic for this time of night after the day of play they had, walking in his direction.

"Hey Shaun." Pat greeted cheerily.

"Hey." Shaun replied yawning.

"Any plans for the night?"

"Sleeping."

"So I take that to mean you don't want to play scrabble with us?" Pat questioned.

"You're playing scrabble again, after last night? Pat, you've been saying all day how he cheated." Shaun said gesturing to Mitch.

"Yeah, but I bought an official scrabble dictionary on my phone so that there won't be any indiscretions as to what is a real word and what is not."

"I told you I didn't cheat, smeat is a word!" Mitch replied to Pat.

"If smeat is a word, give me a definition." 

"Why do you need a definition, why can't you just believe me when I say it's a word?"

"Probably has something to do with the fact that you told me last time you played you ended up sleeping on the couch because you made up words."

"No, I said that I ended up sleeping on the couch, never told you why."

"What other reason would you end up on the couch other than cheating at the game?"

"Guys," Shaun interrupted realising Pat and Mitch were having their own conversation, "I really hope that your game tonight is more successful than your last, and thank you for the invitation, but right now all I want to do is shower and sleep."

"Yeah of course, we'll see you in the morning." Pat said smiling.

"Yeah, night guys." Shaun said.

"Night." Pat and Mitch said in almost perfect unison and continued walking to their rooms, while they were walking away Shaun heard part of their conversation,

"So why exactly did Josh make you sleep on the couch last time you played?" Pat questioned curiously.

"Oh, I told him that if I didn't win i'd leave him for the guy that fixed our toilet when it broke," Mitch replied.

"That's awful!"

"Yeah, I may have a slight problem with competitiveness."

"May?"

Shaun shook his head and sighed at the conversation before continuing to walk down the hall to his room. When he entered his room he placed his stuff on the small table and walked straight towards the bathroom to shower. After he had finished he realised that he hadn't actually checked his phone since he turned it off that morning and decided it was probably something he should do. Turning it on, Shaun saw a message from Bec stating that she was wrong and Mitch seemed really happy, Shaun smiled as he walked over to the sofa in the room and turned on the TV. He knew that Mitch was fine, he knew that Bec had been worried over nothing, skipping one meal didn't mean that Mitch was struggling again, he hadn't shown any other signs and had been doing so well since he and Pat got together, sure it had been a rough eight months, but he was coping, Shaun knew he was.

**Around three years ago**

"Shaun." Bec prodded Shaun from where she was seated on the sofa.

"Yeah." Shaun replied.

"I'm worried."

"Look Bec I already told you mum and dad taking Austin for a few hours tomorrow isn't going to be that bad, they raised three kids and we turned out fine, he'll be safe I promise."

"That's not what I was talking about."

"What then?"

"I'm worried about Mitch."

"Mitch?"

"Yes Mitch, Shaun he's been in there for ages." Bec gestured to the bathroom which Mitch had wandered into about forty minutes ago and Shaun turned to look.

"I'm sure he's fine, he's probably just meditating."

"Often meditate in a bathroom do you?"

"It's quiet."

"So is his room, if he wanted to meditate he could do it in there."

"What exactly are you worried about?"

"He could have collapsed."

"If he had collapsed we would have heard the thump."

"Just because he hasn't collapsed doesn't mean he isn't seriously sick Shaun, maybe you should go and check on him."

"Why do I have to do it?"

"Because your his older brother."

"I fulfilled my older brother duties when I gave him the sex talk."

"I shudder to think how that went."

"It went well actually, it was very informative."

"Tell me you didn't have a power point or something like that."

"No I didn't, but that would have been a good idea."

"Why did you give him the sex talk and not your dad?"

"No one should ever have to go through what I did when dad gave me the talk." Shaun shuddered, "So I offered to give it to him instead, in many ways I saved the kid."

"Well now you can save him again."

"Will you be quiet about it if I go?"

"Probably."

"Fine then." Shaun said as he stood up and went to walk to the bathroom, just as he was about to walk over the sound of the toilet flushing filled the house and he turned back to Bec,

"See, I told you, he's fine."

"Yeah, maybe." Bec said sceptically.

Mitch walked out of the bathroom and towards the kitchen where he filled a glass of water before turning to see both Bec and Shaun staring at him.

"What?" he questioned.

"Are you alright?" Bec said with a worried tone.

"Yeah, fine, why are you asking me this, and staring at me like Shaun did when I was nine he told me my cat had been hit by a truck?"

"Oh I remember that, wasn't it's name Casper?" Shaun asked.

"Yeah." Mitch frowned.

Bec shook her head and proceeded to speak, "You were in there for forty minutes Mitch."

"So how long have you been timing my visits to the bathroom Bec?" Mitch retaliated defensively, like his whole personality had changed suddenly.

"I haven't, but it's hard to miss when somebody is the bathroom for that long, I was worried."

"Well you shouldn't be."

"Why were you in there for so long then?"

"Does it matter?" Mitch scoffed making Bec angry.

"Yeah it does actually, you're living in my house-"

"Our house." Shaun interrupted and Bec turned to glare at him before continuing,

"You're living in our house and we have a right to know what you were doing in our bathroom for so long."

"Last time I checked, I was an adult, and that means that I don't have to tell you every detail of my life." Mitch said rather loudly but felt himself getting dizzy and fell back slightly before regaining his balance.

"You do look pretty pale mate." Shaun said in a softer tone than Bec had been speaking in.

"Alright fine, if you must know, I had orange chicken for lunch, clearly it was dodgy and it made me sick. Now, if the inquisition into my life is over, i'm going to lie down." Mitch said as he turned to pick up his glass of water and walk off towards his room shutting his door once he was inside.

"See, I told you there was nothing to worry about, he'll be fine after he sleeps for a bit." Shaun said.

"Shaun he doesn't have food poisoning."

"What, how do you know?"

"He didn't eat lunch Shaun, he hasn't left the house all morning, we've been out here the entire time."

"Why would he lie Bec?"

"I don't know Shaun," Bec said solemnly, "I really don't know."

**Present Day**

Shaun rubbed his eyes with his hands before bringing them back to his sides. He still couldn't believe that something had been so wrong with Mitch and he hadn't picked up on anything, having a new baby wasn't any excuse for missing flashing warning lights like Mitch was giving off. But Mitch was fine now, he had been fine for ages, Shaun hadn't noticed any signs before he left for England let alone in the past two years and now that Bec was convinced that everything was fine, things could go about their business as usual. Shaun yawned again and concluded that he should definitely go to sleep, he switched off the TV and wandered over to the bed, where he got under the covers and rolled onto his side, closed his eyes and allowed himself to drift into a peaceful sleep.


	4. Silence

Pat was stressed. Pat was very stressed. He wasn't exactly sure at what point he had become the saving grace of the Australian cricket team, but somewhere along the line he had, and now, he was stressed. Everywhere he turned there was an article or an interview about how Australia would win or lose because of him, and if he was being completely honest, he was sick of it, how did anyone actually expect him to play well under that kind of pressure? It was ridiculous.  He had to talk to someone about it, Pat knew that, and from what he could gather he had three options.

One, he could talk to his boyfriend, his wonderful, kind, caring, supportive boyfriend, who he knew was always going to listen to whatever Pat had to say and help wherever he could. But the fact was, Mitch was in Perth, he wasn't in England, and given how their last World Cup related conversation went, Pat didn't think that it was best idea to talk about how much pressure he was under in team that he knew Mitch would give anything to be a part of.

Two, he could talk to Shaun, someone who had been through the pressure of having to perform for your country before and knew how to deal with it. Shaun and Pat had become reasonably close over the past two years, and Shaun did say that Pat could come to him about anything. But Pat knew that Shaun had his own issues to deal with at the moment, he was currently in deep competition as to who was going to bat at number three in the first match in two days time and Pat wasn't about to unload what probably wasn't even a major problem and distract him from the opportunity to play.

That left him with number three, which was why he was standing in the rather bland hallway of the hotel the team had been staying at, in his training clothes, about the knock on the door he was standing in front of. He knocked three times before taking a step back and waiting for a response which came in the form of a rather dishevelled looking Mitch Starc, dressed in his pyjamas at just past four in the afternoon. 

"You look like absolute shit." Pat was speaking bluntly.

"Thanks Pat. You certainly know how to make a guy feel special." Mitch responded.

"So I've been told, can I come in?"

"Oh gee, I don't know, got any more insults to launch in my direction?"

"You know what, it's fine, i'll just go." 

Pat turned and started to walk away, "Pat, i'm sorry, course you can come in." Mitch called after him, realising he must have hit a nerve, and Pat walked into the room.

"This place is a mess." Pat said looking at the unmade bed and rubbish scattered all over the room.

"Cleaning hasn't exactly been high on my priority list."

"Yeah, I guess it hasn't, how's your throat?"

"It's good, better than it was, doctor says I should be able to train tomorrow."

"Good, that's good."

"Are you alright Pat?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know, you seem distant."

"I've just got a few things on my mind."

"Like what?"

"Everyone expects me to be perfect and lead the team to victory."

"And?"

"And it's too much pressure, I can't deal with it!"

"Yes you can."

"I can't, I really can't, so if you're trying the whole blind optimism thing, don't."

"That wasn't what I was doing, but I get why you feel the way you do. You were out of the team for so long and then when you finally got back into it, no one really knew where to play you or if you were a safe bet to play at all, understandable considering Josh and I were more reliable."

"Wow, okay-"

"But, pretty soon you found your feet and proved that you were a genuine threat to the opposition, and since then all you've done is improve. It's really not surprising that everybody thinks you're the one who can win us a World Cup."

"I don't want everyone to think that though, I just wan't to go about my business without all the expectation."

"One thing I've learnt in my career Pat is that they'll always be expectation, you just have to learn how to ignore it."

"And how do you? Ignore it?"

"Don't buy into it, you go out there and you think about you, what you want to do, not what everyone else thinks you should be doing."

"Easier said than done."

"Ultimately it's down to you. You can think about like you have to do this, this and this and over analyse everything, or, you can be out there playing with ten of your best mates and win, lose or draw you know that you did your absolute best."

"Yeah, I guess, thanks Mitch."

"You're welcome."

Pat knew that Mitch's advice was good, and it would probably relive a whole heap of the stress he had been feeling lately, but being the one everyone thought would lead the team to victory wasn't the only thing he had on his mind.

"Was there something else?" Mitch asked, probably sensing the tension in Pat's body.

"Do you and Josh talk a lot? Like have you talked a lot since you've been over here?" Pat replied.

"How much do you classify as a lot?"

"I don't know, when was the last time you spoke on the phone?"

"He called a few hours ago."

"Right, so you talk everyday then?"

"Pretty much. Why?"

"No reason."

"I find it hard to believe that you brought up such a specific subject for no reason.

"It's not that specific."

"It's pretty specific. Now, why the sudden interest in my relationship?"

"It's nothing, just, Mitch and I haven't really spoken that much lately."

"How much is not that much?"

"Excluding a couple of texts, a week."

"A week?!" Mitch yelled probably louder than he meant to, "You haven't spoken to your boyfriend in a week?"

"Technically no."

"Why not?"

"There's like a seven hour time difference, so the times we could speak, i'm either training, playing or in a team meeting. And he has a life too."

"Yeah, a life that pretty much revolves around you, you two do everything together."

"We do not do everything together."

"Two words Pat, South Africa."

**Fifteen months ago**

Mitch's fingers were entwined in Pat's as the two walked down the rather bland hallway towards the hotel restaurant. Mitch opened the door, reluctantly letting go of Pat's hand as he did, and the two moved into the room and over to the table where some of the team were sitting. Mitch jokingly shoved Pat and got a laugh in response as the two of them were sitting down, once they were seated Pat playfully shoved Mitch who feigned offence before laughing softly.

"Well, that's put me off my lunch." Josh spoke from across the table to Pat and Mitch who were continuing to playfully push each other around.

"It's put everybody off their lunch." Mitch Starc spoke from beside him.

"Do you think they're going to stop anytime soon?"

"Probably not, oi you two!" Mitch Starc leaned over the table and clicked in Pat and Mitch's faces.

"What?" Pat asked, slightly laughing from Mitch attempting to tickle him.

"Do you think that maybe you can tone down the whole lovey dovey act when people are trying to eat?"

"Lovey dovey act?"

Josh and Mitch Starc looked at each other before starting to re-enact what Pat and Mitch had been doing just moments prior.

"We don't look like that." Mitch said whilst looking on.

"You really do." Josh spoke.

"And what's wrong with showing affection Josh?" Pat chimed in.

"Nothing, showing affection is great, in moderation."

"Ah moderation, that explains your relationship then."

"Just because we aren't joined at the hip like you, doesn't mean we're not affectionate." Josh turned to Mitch Starc next to him who nodded.

"We are not joined at the hip."

"I haven't actually seen you two be apart for more than five minutes since we got here a weak ago." Josh turned to face Mitch who was next to Pat before continuing, "You've even started to come to all the bowlers gym sessions."

"I always came to the bowlers gym sessions, I am a bowler too."

"You came to a few, but you mostly trained with the batsmen, lately however, you're always there, on the same rotation as Pat."

"I'm only training, it's what we're all supposed to do."

"Okay, how about the team meetings?"

"What about the team meetings?"

"I haven't been at one where you two aren't sitting next to each other and whispering, and you always turn up together, not matter what."

"Those meetings are that boring, and I've seen you two talking to each other during them as well."

"Maybe, but not as much as you."

Josh looked Mitch in the eye as he stood up and pushed his chair out, "I don't have to listen to this, I came to get lunch, not a lecture bout how much affection I should show in public."

Mitch walked off in the direction of the buffet as Pat slowly stood up and went to follow him, not before Josh raised his eyebrows and gave him a knowing look however, "What? I came here for lunch as well." he walked off and caught up to Mitch, shoving him in the back and resuming their earlier antics.

"So do you think they're gonna stop?" Mitch Starc asked leaning in.

"Look at them Mitch, do you think that they're gonna stop anytime soon?"

"It's gonna be a long series, isn't it?"

"That it is." Josh picked up his fork and started to eat again as Mitch placed a comforting hand on his lower back, "A very long series."

**Present Day**

"South Africa doesn't count." 

"It does."

"No, we were coming up to our one year anniversary, meaning everything we did was over affectionate. And I think you're forgetting that we can't do everything together, we live on opposite sides of the country."

"Don't get all technical, the point is, you two are close, going a week without speaking just doesn't seem right."

"I know that, but I can't find the time to have a conversation with him."

"That's when you make time Pat, Josh stayed up until three in the morning so we could talk one time."

"I'm not going to make Mitch stay up late just so we can talk."

"Then why don't you stay up late?"

"Because i'm not sure how the coaches would feel about me turning up to training the next morning exhausted because I stayed up late to talk to my boyfriend."

"You need to talk to him Pat, it doesn't matter when."

"Yeah, look I should go, thanks for all the advice."

"It's all good, just take some of it on board yeah?"

"I will, see you later."

"Bye."

Pat made his way to the door, opening it he waved goodbye to Mitch before walking into the hallway and closing the door behind him. He began to make his way back to his room further up the hallway, arriving at the door he pulled out his swipe card and unlocked it before entering his room. Turning on the lights he walked to his bed and carefully lay down across it. Pat's mind was racing, he needed to talk to Mitch, he knew that, but they hadn't spoken properly in nearly a week, and Pat didn't know what to say when they did, part of him knew that if they started talking the conversation would pretty soon navigate itself into cricket, and Pat didn't want their first proper conversation in that long to be about how he was struggling with being in a team Mitch wasn't. Pat wouldn't put Mitch through that, not again, not after the last cricket related conversation they had ended with him being so upset, no he wouldn't do that to the man he loved more than anything. Pat took his phone out of his pocket and put it onto the charger on his bedside table, leaning back onto the bed he closed his eyes and lay in complete silence, hoping to drift off to sleep.

***

To say that Bec was worried wouldn't be entirely accurate, she was however, quickly becoming more and more concerned. She had been sitting at the dining table for the past half hour, the tea she had been drinking was still in her hands and the magazine she was reading had long been forgotten and pushed aside, her focus now solely ahead of her in the living room, where Mitch had been sitting since the party had ended, in complete silence. It wasn't unusual for Mitch to want his own space, he was an adult after all, but this was different, Mitch hadn't moved since he had sat down. He had been great at Austin's party preparing everything and keeping the kids entertained even spending an hour afterwards helping Bec clean up everything, but the moment he had finished, he moved to the sofa where he sat down and proceeded to stare out the window blankly without saying anything at all, and that had been an hour ago. 

When she thought about it, Bec realised that Mitch had been a bit off all day, he just hadn't been his normal bubbly self. She knew that there was probably a perfectly reasonable explanation for that though, he had stayed up to whatever hour to watch Australia's opening World Cup match, she had watched some of it with him. So yes, Mitch could have just been tired, but him being different all day coupled with the complete silence he was sitting in now was creating an uneasy sensation in Bec's stomach. She brought her mug of rapidly cooling tea to her mouth and took a sip, keeping her eyes looking firmly ahead of her.

**Two and a half years ago**

"He's been like that for two days Shaun." Bec said with worry evident in her voice.

"They said that was normal in situations like this." Shaun replied in a calm manner.

"Yes, because staring at a wall and being completely silent for two whole days is completely normal, isn't it?"

"They know more about this then we do Bec."

"Really? What makes them experts exactly? Tell me Shaun, because i'm fairly certain that we know him better than they do!"

"Look, I know that you're worried I am too, but criticising the doctors and nurses isn't really going to help anything." Shaun said as Austin squirmed in his arms, "I think Austin's hungry. Why don't you-"

"No, i'm not leaving." Bec interrupted.

"We can't just stop looking after our son because this happened Bec, he still needs us."

"Us looking after Austin all the time is clearly one of the reasons why he thought he couldn't come to us about anything Shaun." 

Bec spoke with tension and sadness, before casting her gaze to the centre of the room. In a hospital bed sat Mitch, a cannula in his arm and a hospital gown covering his chest, the faint beeping of the heart monitor was counteracting the complete silence he sat in, staring blankly at the wall ahead. Nausea started to overcome Bec as she observed the sight in front of her and she was entirely certain she was going to be sick before she heard Shaun speak softly,

"He didn't want to come to us Bec."

"We should have realised that something was wrong, all those times-" 

Bec found herself struggling to hold back tears and let herself fall into Shaun's side, he placed a comforting arm around her and a kiss to the top of her head.

"There was no way we could have known how bad things were."

Just as Bec was about to respond the door leading to the hallway opened to reveal a nurse.

"Sorry to interrupt guys, I just need to take some obs and run a few tests." 

"Oh okay." Bec responded.

"You're welcome to stay."

"That's alright, we should probably get some fresh air." Shaun spoke to the nurse before turning to the bed, "Do you want anything mate?" he asked Mitch, who in response pulled the blankets up over himself before lying down and rolling onto his side to face away from Bec and Shaun, who left the room with Austin, concern on both their faces, shutting the door behind them.

Mitch stayed silent for days after, he stared at the wall ahead of him blankly, not acknowledging anyone or anything that may enter his room. Bec and Shaun were there every day, for the entirety of the visiting hours, they had decided that it was probably for the best if Austin stayed with Bec's parents while they were at the hospital. About a week after Mitch had been admitted Bec was sitting in the rather uncomfortable chair that was situated beside the bed, she had come alone that morning because Shaun had a meeting. She was reading some article in a magazine when she heard a soft sniffling coming from beside her, she didn't think too much of it at first but the sniffling became progressively louder and when she looked up at the bed she saw Mitch, eyes red and tears streaming down his cheeks. Quickly placing the magazine on the floor, Bec leaned forward and grabbed Mitch's hand through the railings on the bed, squeezing it softly and with comfort she spoke,

"Hey, hey it's alright, i'm here." Mitch squeezed back.

They stayed like that for ten minutes, Bec softly rubbing her thumb over the top of Mitch's hand to calm him while he continued to cry. Mitch used his free hand to wipe away the tears on his face before turning his head and looking at Bec.

"I'm sorry." he spoke quietly, barely above a whisper.

"You have nothing to be sorry for Mitch." Bec said with a comforting tone.

"You've barely left since I've been in here, you should have been with Austin."

"Austin's with mum and dad, he's fine."

"I never meant for it to get this far."

"That doesn't matter, now that we know, we can help you."

"This isn't your and Shaun's responsibility. I'm not your and Shaun's responsibility."

"Mitch, you're family, we love you. We're going to get through this together, okay?"

"Okay."

**Present Day**

Bec went to take another sip of her tea, which she noticed was now completely cold, seeing more sense in making a new cup she stood up from her position at the dining table and walked the short distance to the kitchen. Tipping what was left of her original cup down the sink and placing the mug on the bench, she grabbed another from the shelf and placed it next to hers. Filling the kettle with water and putting it on to boil, Bec turned back towards the living room where Mitch was still silent and staring through the window in front of him, the uneasy feeling had settled in her stomach and she was becoming increasingly unsettled by the situation. The sound of the kettle having finished boiling startled her and she turned to make the tea, picking up both cups Bec turned to walk in the direction of the living room, being careful not to spill or drop anything as she did. She arrived at the living room and proceeded to place both mugs on the coffee table in the centre, sitting in the armchair next to the sofa Bec went to speak, just as she opened her mouth however Mabel started crying in the distance, breaking the silence which had filled the house for the past hour. Standing up once again, Bec turned to walk in the direction of Mabel's room, just as she reached the start of the hallway she turned back to the living room, Mitch was still sitting silently, staring through the window ahead, not making any attempt to reach for the mug Bec had placed in front of him. Sighing, she started to walk down the hallway and in the direction of her crying child.

***

Mitch had always appreciated silence, ironic considering he was usually the loudest in whatever room he was in, there was just something about sitting quietly and choosing something to focus on that made him calm. That was probably why whenever he felt stressed or anxious or upset or confused he would sit in complete silence, barely acknowledging anyone or anything, that was also probably why for the past hour he had been staring at the tree across the street through the window in the living room. The thing was, he knew that it probably freaked people out and made them worried, and he knew that was exactly why Bec had been observing him for half an hour, and had Mabel not have started to cry, she definitely would have tried to talk to him, and that wasn't what Mitch wanted. He wanted to sit quietly and forget about how anxious and upset he had been since he woke up. Austin's party had been a great distraction, though the sight of a bunch of three year olds hyped up on chocolate crackles was probably going to be permanently ingrained into his memory, the minute the party had ended however, everything came flooding back, and he just wanted it to stop.

The steam that was once rising from the tea Bec had placed in front of him was rapidly disappearing and it seemed that she had finally managed to settle Mabel, Mitch however, was very far from being settled, he could feel the anxiety in his chest and it wasn't likely to disappear any time soon. He wasn't stupid, he knew what was causing it, he was in Perth and Pat hadn't called, Pat hadn't even texted. Mitch knew that he was busy, and it wasn't like he expected an update every five minutes, but it had been a week since their last actual conversation and since then he had counted about three texts and one voicemail, but today, nothing. Australia had won their opening match and Mitch understood that Pat couldn't call or text him straight away, even for a couple of hours afterwards, but to hear nothing, he didn't understand. Granted, their last cricket themed conversation hadn't particularly ended well, but that wouldn't happen again, Mitch knew it wouldn't, because he could control his emotions so that his boyfriend could talk to him about what's happening in one of the most important tournaments in cricket.

Mitch stood up from his position on the sofa slowly, picking up the mug on the table in front of him, he walked to the kitchen where he tipped the liquid down the sink before rinsing and placing the mug on the drying rack. He turned and walked in the direction of his room, closing the door carefully when he was inside, he allowed himself to slide down until he was in the sitting position, back against the wall. Pulling his phone from the pocket of his jeans, he turned it on and the screen brightened to reveal no message from Pat, but the photo Mitch had set as his background. The photo was of Mitch and Pat the last time they went to the beach in Sydney, Mitch lying on a towel and Pat behind him, wearing sunglasses, kissing his neck. Mitch momentarily smiled at the memory before the sadness he had been feeling all day returned. He and Pat had always been close, even before the got together they were best friends, and since they got together they were even closer, people constantly joked that they were in fact joined at the hip, and they weren't necessarily wrong. Pat was the first person Mitch looked for in the field when they were playing together, even when they weren't playing Mitch wanted to be around Pat, which was hard considering they lived on opposite sides of the country, but they made it work, and the times they were together they made count.

Take the time they had spent in Brisbane before Pat flew to England, whenever Pat wasn't training or playing in the practice matches against New Zealand, the two of them were together. Mitch wasn't playing and that was difficult, but Pat had wanted him to be there, so he was. They had mostly stayed in Pat's hotel room, but they had dinner together, and talked, and did all the things that they did so well. They had promised that they would constantly talk, stay in touch, it had all seemed so simple a month ago, they could facetime and call whenever and sooner than either of them knew it they would be together again, but it hadn't been that simple, far from it, and now Mitch was struggling. He just wanted to be with Pat, to hold him, kiss him, but he couldn't, not for another two weeks, he felt sad and anxious and angry all at the same time, and he hadn't felt that way in a long time. 

Trying to shake the feelings and thoughts from his mind, Mitch closed his eyes and tried to focus, but before he knew it, he found himself slowly standing from his position against his door and walking to the corner of his room. Opening the plastic bag full of food that Bec had put there when she needed more room for the party, Mitch reached for the loaf of bread and walked back to his earlier position on the floor behind his door. He opened the bag and the rather flimsy clasp fell to the ground, reaching into the plastic Mitch pulled out a slice and brought it to his mouth. One slice turned to two, which turned to seven and soon the bag was empty. Mitch sat in silence for ten minutes before he got up from his position, opened his bedroom door and made his way to the bathroom. Closing and locking the door behind him, he made his way over the tiled floor to the toilet in the corner of the room. Opening the toilet lid and kneeling down, Mitch brought his fingers to his throat and watched everything he had worked to avoid over the past three years disappear into the water below.


	5. The Perfect Reunion

Mitch had never really noticed it before, but his bedroom ceiling had three separate areas where the paint was starting to fade. He had been lying on his bed, head resting on his pillow, staring upwards for the past twenty minutes, his throat was burning, a consequence no doubt of his actions over the past hour. He had been packing his bags that he was taking to England in two days time, sorting through the rather large pile of shirts when he found one that didn't belong to him, it was long sleeved, dusty grey in colour, and the same one that Pat wore to bed whenever he was in Perth. 

It was the point at which he had found the shirt that he had started to become anxious, it still smelled like Pat and reminded Mitch just how much he was missing him. Emotions had quickly overcome him and after about ten minutes of trying to control them without success, Mitch found himself walking from his position on the floor to his dresser and opening the first drawer. Pushing his socks to one side, he found the packet of lamingtons he had stashed there days ago and moved himself back to his bed where he sat cross legged on the mattress. The sound of the plastic opening had filled the room and completely disregarding the fact that anyone could storm into his room at any time, Mitch began to eat.

That had become the pattern. Mitch would get overwhelmed or upset or anxious, and he would eat, and eat some more, until he was walking down the hallway to the bathroom and bringing everything he had eaten back up. It had been two weeks, he knew that it wasn't healthy, and he knew that he was throwing away everything he had done to come through it last time, but there was a part of his brain telling him it was the only way, the only way he would stop feeling like he was completely failing at everything he was supposed to be good at.

Mitch was brought from his racing thoughts by a soft knock at the door and the creaking that came when it opened. Bec poked her head through the opening and smiled in his direction,

"Aren't you supposed to be packing?" she asked.

"Yeah, just taking a break."

"You good to go?"

"Yep, all good."

Mitch jumped to his feet and grabbed a hoodie off the top of his dresser before following Bec out of the room. She had asked earlier that morning if he wanted to go shopping to pick up some last minute things for the trip, and he had agreed. There was something about hanging out with Bec and talking to her that made Mitch forget about how far away he was from Pat and how wrong everything was in his life, for a few hours he would be able to feel like his normal self again, something he hadn't felt for a while. The drive was quiet, uneventful, and soon Mitch was pushing Mabel in her pram through the busy shopping complex, Bec with a tight grasp on Austin's hand beside him. Stopping to get coffee, Bec was going through her comprehensive list of exactly what they needed and Mitch was starting to think that they would need more than a couple of hours. Twenty minutes later the four of them were walking through the kids section of Kmart, Mitch making faces at Mabel who was smiling back at him.

"Share adores you." Bec smiled and looked at Mitch.

"She's not even six months old Bec, i'm not sure she has the capabilities to adore me." Mitch laughed.

"Still, you're really good with her."

"Well that isn't hard when she's this cute, is it?" Mitch leaned down and smiled while Mabel waved her arms and legs in response, Bec laughed.

"Mum!" Austin spoke as he pulled at Bec's arm, "I want that one!" he pointed at the rack across the aisle to a blue and white striped shirt.

"We already have everything you need sweetie, we just need to get a couple more things for Mabel." Bec explained and Austin frowned, "Well, I guess maybe one more shirt can't hurt." She continued once she saw the look on her son's face.

Forty five minutes and three stores later they were in the men's section of the jeans department, Bec sitting on what was really an oversized sofa for a change room with Austin happily distracted beside her by his toy dinosaur and Mabel asleep in the pram on her other side.

"So I guess you're excited to see Pat again."

"Yeah, course I am, can't wait." Mitch replied from the change room  he was in, a smile evident in his voice.

"Anything special planned for the big reunion?"

"What do you mean something special?" Mitch's voice got louder as he unlocked the change room and walked out towards Bec.

"No." She said sternly.

"No?" The confusion was evident in his voice.

"No. Not those ones."

"Why not?"

"They're beige."

"So?"

"Not with your skin tone."

"I actually kinda liked them." Mitch said as he turned to look at himself in the mirror.

"And this is why I insist on picking what you wear on dates."

"Okay okay." Mitch countered as he returned to the change room, "What did you mean by something special?"

"Oh, what's the plan when you actually see him?"

"I don't really have one, probably just a hug."

"You can't do that, you haven't seen each other in over a month!" Bec sounded mortified.

"If you're such an expert, what's your grand plan with Shaun?" Mitch emerged from the change room once again, "These ones?"

"Getting closer." Mitch sighed before once again returning to the change room, "And my plan is actually quite impressive." Bec continued.

"Oh please, enlighten me."

"All you need to know is that I went shopping two days ago for the occasion and your uncle services will be needed at some point."

"Okay, slight overshare Bec."

"The point is, you need to do something extravagant, blow Pat away, show him exactly what he's been missing."

Mitch emerged from the change room once again and just stood in front of Bec, a plain expression on his face, signalling to the jeans he now had on.

"Yep, perfect, those are the ones."

"Finally."

Mitch returned the the change room for a final time and emerged two minutes later. After handing over and obscene amount of money for jeans, they left the store, Mitch pushing the pram and Bec holding Austin's hand, about twenty metres away from the store Bec resumed their conversation,

"So, like I was saying you need to do something extravagant, exotic even."

"That really won't work."

"Why not?"

"Because the most extravagant and exotic thing Pat and I have ever done is had sex at lunchtime."

"Like the lunch break in a match, Mitch!" Bec said in surprise as she used her free arm to slap his.

"No, like at home, in my bedroom, with the curtains pulled, while no one was there. I don't think we've actually ever had sex when you and Shaun have been home."

"Oh." Bec said, "You know that you can right? I mean Shaun and I have." Mitch gave her a confused look, "Had sex when you've been home." She clarified. 

"I know."

Bec blushed slightly before regaining her composure and smiling in Mitch's direction.

"We just need to think of something to make this the perfect reunion."

"Perfect reunions only exist in fairy tales Bec, it's not worth wasting the time on."

"If you think that I am giving up on this that easily, then you don't know me at all."

***

"Okay no." Pat said in a serious tone, "No, no, no, no, no, no."

"What?" Mitch Starc questioned.

"I have been putting up with this for the past hour. No."

"What?" Mitch was laughing now.

"Datish, is not a word."

"Seriously? This again?"

"Yes, yes this again."

"I find it truly amazing that this only comes up when you're losing."

"I'm only losing because you keep making up words! I mean seriously afafa?"

The two were interrupted by a knock at the door and Mitch stood up looking down at Pat on the floor,

"That'll be the scrabble police to take me away." Mitch joked laughing as he moved to answer the door.

Pat stayed seated and took out his phone in order to check the authenticity of datish as a word. Seemingly fascinated by the screen in front of him, it was after two minutes that Pat noticed the room was completely silent and Mitch hadn't actually come back to the game, still firmly focused on his screen Pat spoke,

"So I looked it up, and no dictionary anywhere, in any language, including that scrabble one I bought, lists datish as a word, so I think we should just minus the one hundred and forty five points you claim you won from it and move on."

Mitch still didn't respond, worrying Pat.

"Look I can't believe that I have to say this, but if by some chance the actual police are at the door, complete and utter silence might not be the best way to-"

Pat eventually looked up from his phone and immediately smiled at the sight in front of him. Mitch still had one hand on the handle of the door which was wide open, and outside the door stood Josh, dressed on jeans and a hoodie, hands in his pockets and a smile on his face.

In a sudden movement which startled even Pat, Mitch launched from his position and practically jumped onto Josh who nearly fell backwards into the wall behind him. Standing up from his position on the floor, Pat placed his phone in his back pocket and walked over to where Mitch was quickly pulling Josh into the room.

"I'll leave you guys to it, good to see you Josh." Pat said.

"Yeah you too, we'll talk tomorrow."

Pat nodded and smiled and with that left the room, the door closing behind him. Standing in the hallway he took a moment before beginning to walk in the direction of his own room, and unlocking his door when he arrived. Moving inside, Pat turned on the light and walked over to the bed in the centre of the room, allowing himself to fall onto the cushioned mattress below.

Closing his eyes he allowed himself to think about the events of the night. He was happy for Mitch and Josh, of course he was, but seeing someone fly across the world to surprise their significant other was making him realise just how much he was missing his own boyfriend. The thing was, Pat still hadn't spoken to Mitch that much, they had spoken more, but not as much as they should, and he was missing him. Opening his eyes and rolling over he looked at the clock and saw it was eight o'clock at night meaning it was probably three in the morning in Perth, meaning Mitch would be asleep. Not letting this dissuade him, Pat picked up his phone from where he had placed it on the bedside table when he entered the room and typed out a message to Mitch,

_Hey, I know you're not awake, I just needed to tell you how much I missed you._

He put his phone down next to him and not even thirty seconds later his message tone went off.

_Call me._

Pat hadn't expected a response, in fact it was the last thing he expected considering the current time in Perth, but he still dialled Mitch's number and listened to the phone ring.

"Hey." Mitch's voice came through the phone before Pat had the chance to start the conversation.

"Hey, I didn't expect you to respond, it's so early, if my message woke you-" Pat spoke.

"I've been awake for hours, it's hard to sleep when you're not here."

"Yeah, I miss you so much Mitch."

"I miss you too. We haven't spoken that much since you've been over there."

"I know, I should have called you."

"I could have called you, but I get it's hard with the whole time difference thing and your training. You've been playing well."

"Thanks, I could be playing better."

"You're doing your best, that's all people can ask of you."

"I know, I just want to do well."

"You are, i'm proud of you."

"What have you been up to?"

"Not a lot, been packing these past two days."

"You excited?"

"To get on a plane with what is bound to be a screaming infant, yeah."

Pat laughed softly, "You'll be okay."

"What about you? What have you been doing?"

"Not much, training. Oh, Josh flew in early to surprise Mitch."

"That's sweet, kind of the perfect reunion for them."

"Yeah, it was, I don't think Mitch could believe it when he opened the door."

"I can imagine he couldn't." Mitch yawned.

"You're tired."

"A bit."

"You should go to sleep."

"I don't want to, can't we just talk for a little longer?"

"Yeah, course we can."

And that's what they did, the two continued to talk for the next twenty minutes, catching up on everything and talking about anything until Pat noticed that Mitch's yawns were becoming much more frequent.

"Okay, now you really do need to sleep Mitch." he said with concern slightly lacing his voice.

"I know, we'll talk tomorrow?"

"Yeah, call me before you get on the plane."

"I am excited Pat."

"Huh?"

"To see you, to come to England, I am excited."

"I never doubted you were, goodnight Mitch."

"Night Pat."

Pat hung up the phone and sat up, that was what he needed, he needed to talk to Mitch and hear his voice, and now that he had, he felt so much better about things. They would be together again soon and everything would go back to the way it had always been. Reaching for the TV remote to his side, Pat turned it on and allowed the room to be filled with the noise, though his thoughts were firmly on his boyfriend and how good everything would be once they were together.

***

Mitch had always found flying to be tedious, it was probably the only thing he disliked about playing international cricket, spending upwards of ten hours basically sitting in the same position drove him mad. He was usually okay, but this flight was different, because usually he had Pat there, sitting next to him, distracting him from the fact that he was thirty five thousand feet in the air with no way to escape, even if it was with questionable methods, but Pat was already in England, and five hours into his current flight Mitch was struggling. Austin had fallen asleep about an hour in, Mabel had followed suit about ten minutes after she had been fed half an hour ago, and Bec had drifted off in the past ten or so minutes leaving Mitch to stare out the window at the ocean below with his music softly playing in his ears and thoughts racing through his head.

**Fifteen months ago**

"Watch."

"Huh?"

"Give me the watch."

"Why exactly do you need my watch?" Mitch asked as he undid the watch around his wrist and handed it to Pat's outstretched hand.

"The phone."

Mitch took the phone out of his backpack pocket and handed it to Pat.

"The iPad."

Mitch once again delved into his bag and took the iPad out, handing it to Pat who was mounting quite the collection.

"And the laptop."

"Okay no, I am not giving you all my electronic devices."

"The laptop Mitch."

Mitch reached into his bag one final time pulled out his laptop which he handed to Pat who opened his own bag and put all Mitch's things he had just collected inside before zipping it up and placing on the ground on his side away from Mitch.

"Now that you have basically everything I own, do you want to tell me why you took it?" Mitch asked.

"I only took everything that you could check the time on."

"Why?"

Before Pat had the chance to reply a female voice came over the speaker system,

"Ladies and gentlemen, your flight to Durban South Africa is about to depart. Please ensure that your seat is in the upright position and your seat belt is fastened. We hope you enjoy your experience with us today."

Ten minutes later the plane was in the air and the fasten seat belt light had been turned off, not forgetting their earlier conversation Mitch turned to Pat and proceeded to speak,

"So why exactly did you take all my stuff?"

"Because Mitch we all know how it would have gone, you would have checked the time every ten minutes and then complained about how there's no way it could possibly be going that slowly. I'm doing everyone in the team and on this flight a favour."

"So what do you suggest I do for the next twenty hours if I don't have any of my stuff genius?"

Pat smiled before leaning down and picking up his bag, out of it he pulled a small book and a pen and placed them on the tray in front of Mitch. Examining the book that had been placed before him Mitch read the title, Sudoku.

"This is your big plan to keep me entertained?" 

"It says hours of fun." Pat said as he pointed to the smaller text below the title on the book.

"I don't even know how to do sudoku!" Mitch spoke with a slightly raised voice.

"Relax, we're going to do it together." Pat smiled again but Mitch had a frown indented onto his face.

Some people claim that puzzles like sudoku are supposed to make you feel calm and relaxed, Mitch was ready to openly say that those people had rocks in their heads, because it was anything but a relaxing and stress free game, no matter how hard he tried there was no way that the numbers would fit. Sighing loudly and dropping the pen Mitch turned to Pat,

"I quit."

"You quit?" Pat asked.

"Yep, it's too hard, there is no way that there is a solution to that." Mitch pointed with disgust to the open page of the book.

"This probably isn't the right time to tell you that that's the easiest one in the book."

"No?!" Mitch gasped in surprise.

"Yeah, they go from easiest to hardest, and we're only on page one." Pat said with a smile and a slight laugh as he pointed to the small number one in the bottom corner of the page.

Mitch felt something rise inside of him, he wasn't sure if it was anger or frustration, but it definitely wasn't the calm or relaxed feeling the quote on the back of the dammed book said the puzzles would bring you.

"Okay, that's it, give me my phone." Mitch said as he moved to reach over Pat to the bag that was on his other side.

"No." Pat said as he grabbed the bag and defended against Mitch who was desperately trying to get at it.

"Patrick, give me my phone!" Mitch's voice was getting louder as he made more desperate attempts to get at the bag.

"Mitch no!" 

"I swear to-"

"Guys!" The two of them turned to where Steve was sitting, papers in front of him and a rather frustrated look on his face, "Quit it."

Both Mitch and Pat turned around and slumped back into their seats, Pat put the bag back on the ground away from Mitch before he turned to face his boyfriend.

"I'm doing it for your own good Mitch, as well as everyone else on this flight." Pat spoke gently.

"Taking my phone just seems controlling, and you know that I will complain for however long left we have of this flight."

"It's probably best that you don't know Mitch." Josh chimed in from two seats down the row as he paused the movie he was watching and turned towards Mitch.

"Yeah well I disagree, oh excuse me," Mitch drifted off when he saw a brown haired flight attendant walking past him down the aisle.

"Yes sir, how can I help?" She responded in a friendly manner.

"This may seem like a strange question, but can you possibly tell me how long we've been in the air for?"

Mitch smiled and Pat immediately sunk his head to his hands in embarrassment. 

"Certainly." The attendant looked at her watch, "We have been flying for forty five minutes."

"Thank you so much."

Mitch smiled again whilst the flight attendant continued walking down the aisle. Once she was far enough away, Mitch immediately turned to Pat with a look halfway between shock and disgust on his face.

"You cannot seriously tell me that we've only been on this plane for forty five minutes!?"

"And you cannot seriously tell me that you just asked some poor woman trying to do her job to tell you how long we've been flying for?" Pat said with disgust evident in his voice.

"I'm just being resourceful, what did you expect when you took all my things?"

Pat opened his mouth to respond but was interrupted by Josh leaning over and handing something to Mitch.

"Here Mitch take this." Josh said as he handed Mitch a pill still enclosed on the card.

"What is it?" Mitch asked sceptically.

"I don't know, it's been in my wallet for about a month."

"Hold up." Pat interluded, "You're giving him a pill when you have no clue what it actually is?"

"What's the worst that could happen?"

"He could die!?"

"Well we all want him to shut up."

"Nice Josh, nice." Mitch said, "Don't think that we don't all know what you're doing over there."

"You mean watching a movie on my phone that no one confiscated from me?" Josh retaliated smartly.

"Ha ha. No, under the blanket. No point in faking being asleep anymore Mitch." Mitch spoke louder in the direction of Mitch Starc who was curled up under the large airline blanket that was covering both he and Josh, facing away from Mitch and Pat. Suddenly Mitch stirred from under the blanket and leaned forward,

"I'm gonna be sick." He mumbled quietly.

Standing up from his position, he quickly brushed past Josh with a hand over his mouth and made his way hastily up the aisle in the direction of the bathroom.

"Nice one Mitch, he's been feeling sick all morning!" Josh said with clear frustration as he leaned back in his seat and turned to face the front of the plane.

Mitch himself leaned back in his seat and faced the front while Pat turned in his direction and gave him a stern look that he caught out of the corner of his eye.

"Happy with yourself are you?" Pat asked.

"I'd be happier if I had my phone."

**Present Day**

This flight had been pretty much the same, monotonous, and Mitch had found himself checking the time more often then not. He was brought back from his thoughts by the sound of Bec shifting beside him, he turned to see her stretching her arms and legs as much as she could in the confined space. Asking with her face for him to take Mabel, who had woken as well, from her, Mitch held his arms out and took the child while Bec leaned down and grabbed something out of her bag. When she sat back up, Mitch saw a packet of tim tams in her hand which she proceeded to open.

"Do you want one?" She offered Mitch the packet, already eating one herself.

"Nah, i'm good." Because he knew if he took one, the whole packet would soon be gone.

Mitch had noticed over the past few hours he had been on the plane that the further he got away from home and the closer he got to England, the more nervous he got. He and Pat hadn't seen each other in over a month, and whilst the majority of him was excited to finally see his boyfriend again, there was a small part of him that was dreading the reunion. A month was a long time,  what if everything had changed between them? What if they didn't click as well as they always did? With hypothetical's running through his head, Mitch could feel himself starting to panic, he could feel his breathing becoming more laboured, and he could feel the space around him start to spin. It was the sound of Bec's voice that broke through his thoughts,

"You okay?"

"Yeah."

"You sure, you look a little pale."

"I guess, I don't know."

Bec signalled for Mitch to hand her back Mabel and once he did she took the time to resettle the child before speaking again.

"Come on, tell me what's going on."

"It's really nothing I can't deal with."

Bec gave Mitch an all knowing look and he sighed before talking again.

"What if everything's changed between us?"

"You and Pat?"

Mitch just nodded in response.

"Why would things have changed?"

"It's been more than a month Bec. What if he doesn't want to see me? What if he doesn't want me to come to England at all?"

"Of course he wants you to come to England, he loves you, misses you like crazy."

"Does he though? I mean we spoke last night, and he never told me that he wanted me to come."

"Mitch." Bec spoke sternly, "Listen to me, Pat loves you, he misses you, and when we get to London you two are gonna see each other and click the same as you always do."

"I know, I-" Mitch stopped and started to nervously tap the heel of his foot on the ground at pace.

"Try and get some sleep yeah, you'll feel better about the whole situation after."

"Yeah, thanks Bec." Mitch smiled at her and she smiled in response.

Hours passed and when Mitch awoke he saw that the sky outside the plane had shifted from night to day. Bec was next to him gently bouncing Mabel on her knee and Austin was playing with his toy dinosaur next to her. Mitch felt calm and at peace with himself for a while, but the beeping sound signalling that seat belts must be fastened and the feeling of the plane descending brought back his panic, and the feeling of the wheels hitting the ground beneath the plane caused this panic to peak. Mitch took a deep breath in an attempt to control it and felt Bec's hand tightening around his own, turning to face her she smiled causing a similar response from him. The plane gradually stopped moving and the sound of the pilots voice came through the speakers above,

"Ladies and gentlemen we have arrived in London."


	6. When Things Don't Work Like They Should

"Thank you so much."

Bec waved at the taxi which was driving off, leaving her, Mitch, Austin, Mabel and their luggage standing on the sidewalk. They turned around and as they did looked up at the tall building which was now in front of them.

"Well, here we are." Bec said.

"Yep, here we are." Mitch replied with apprehension in his voice.

"Mummy, can we go inside, it's cold." Austin spoke.

"Yeah sweetie, let's go." 

The three of them plus Mabel strapped to Bec's chest started walking towards the large gold door entrance of the hotel they would be calling home for the next week, dragging their suitcases behind them. Once inside, Bec took the kids to the seating area of the lobby while Mitch went to the desk to ask about their rooms, when he walked back over after about ten minutes, he sat down on the sofa next to Bec.

"So apparently it's going to be at least half an hour." he said with frustration evident in his voice.

"That's okay, isn't it?" Bec replied.

"I mean, you'd think that in a hotel this fancy-" Mitch gestured to the surrounding features, "They would have the rooms ready to go as soon as people arrive to check in."

"They can't run things perfectly all the time, there are bound to be problems with a hotel this size."

"I never said I wanted them to be perfect, I just want to be able to go to my room as soon as I arrive. It's cold and i'm tired and I just want to be sitting in peace in my room, not sitting in the lobby listening to this irritating music that keeps playing. Like, how hard is it to play music that people actually want to listen to, if you're going to make them wait for half an hour the least you can do is make the wait tolerable."

"Whoa, okay, take like six steps back." Bec said, surprised by the rampage Mitch was going on.

"Why, it's ridiculous, they make you wait here and they don't even put out refreshments, can you even see a water cooler anywhere? And would it kill them to put out a plate of biscuits or something." 

"Are you even hungry?"

"No, but that doesn't matter. They can't claim to be some big shot hotel if they can't even do the little things right. Fuck this, I need coffee, you want one?"

"Yeah, thanks." Bec spoke cautiously as to not irritate Mitch any more.

"Caramel latte?"

Bec just nodded and watched as Mitch walked out of the hotel and presumably to the Starbucks they had seen down the road. Bec felt something nudge at her arm and turned to see Austin, who had been happily playing with his toy dinosaur just a few moments ago, looking up at her.

"Mummy, why is uncle Mitch angry?"

"I think he's just tired darling."

"From the aeroplane?"

"Yeah, why don't you play with dinosaur some more, we'll be in our room soon."

"Okay." Austin said with a smile before continuing to play.

"Good boy."

Ten more minutes passed and after checking her phone, Bec looked up to see Mitch walking through the door with two takeaway coffee cups on top of a small box. He walked over to the sofa they had been sitting on and handed Bec her coffee before sitting down and beginning to drink his, the box he had been carrying resting on his legs. They sat in silence until Bec finally spoke up,

"What's in the box?" 

"Doughnuts." Mitch replied coldly.

"I thought you weren't hungry."

"They're not for me."

"Right." Bec looked down at her cup, unsure of what to say next, "Shaun texted, the bus is still about two hours out."

"Lucky them, maybe they won't have to wait for half a fucking hour before they can get into their rooms."

"I thought that Pat would have told you, you texted him when we landed didn't you?"

"Yes, I told him that we were here, but he didn't reply, because unlike you and Shaun, we aren't codependent on one another."

"I'm starting to think that this mood you've got going on has nothing to do with the fact that we have to wait, and everything to do with you thinking that Pat doesn't want you to be here."

"I don't have a mood going on." Mitch spoke sternly, but when Bec caught a glimpse of his eyes, she saw worry behind the anger.

"Mitch, there could be a million reasons why he didn't text you back, he probably has his phone off, it's not because he doesn't want you here, you don't need to worry."

"I know that, and i'm not worried, i'm pissed off that we have to sit here, when I could already be in my room."

As if on queue, the receptionist walked over to where the four of them had been sitting for the past half hour and smiled.

"Sorry for the delay, here are your room keys, we hope you enjoy your stay with us."

Mitch took the key from the woman's hand and proceeded to walk towards the lifts, pressing the button a great deal harder than he needed to, he heard Bec come up next to him with Austin and Mabel, and it was just his luck that the lift was on the top floor of the building and took what felt like forever to come down. When they were finally inside, the lift moved them to the sixteenth floor reasonably quickly, not quick enough in Mitch's mind, and they walked the hallways trying to find their rooms. Bec ended up being in a different section of the floor to Mitch, probably because she had a family room for her and the kids, and ended up finding her room a lot quicker than he did. Nearly an hour after they actually arrived at the hotel Mitch was standing outside his door, putting the key card in the slot to open it and walking inside.

It was a nice enough room, not that Mitch expected anything less for the amount it was advertised for, but he was still frustrated, and no amount of complementary food baskets would make up for the fact that he had to wait an hour before he could get into the room. Sighing, he walked further to the foot of the bed and placed his bags there before falling back and lying down, his feet still touching the ground. He should unpack, but unpacking had never been something Mitch saw the point to, especially when you travelled around as much as he did, you took all of your stuff out of a bag, and then a week or so later you were putting it back in, it was pointless, but he did need something to occupy the time, and Pat was always on at him about it. Sighing again Mitch stood up and leaned down to unzip the first of his suitcases.

**Fifteen months ago**

Mitch opened the door after a rather persistent knock but didn't even have to chance to speak before Pat was brushing past him and walking over to the bed in his hotel room.

"I mean that's fine, make yourself at home." Mitch spoke as he shut the door and Pat laughed.

"I think your room might be bigger than mine." Pat said as he looked around curiously.

"It's because they value me more."

"Is that so?"

"Yep, i'm the guiding light of the team."

Pat snickered and shook his head before changing the course of conversation, "Can I borrow your jumper?"

"Is that the only reason you came here?"

"No, not the only reason."

"Where's your jumper?"

"In my room."

"Then why do you want mine?"

"Because it's better."

"How can it be better? They're the exact same."

"It smells like you."

"I can't tell if that's cute or creepy, but if you want it it's in one of those suitcases." Mitch pointed to three suitcases on the opposite side of the room.

"Suitcases- why is it in your suitcase?" Pat asked with confusion, although Mitch didn't understand why.

"Well that is how people transport their things when travelling."

"We've been here since eight this morning, and you still haven't unpacked?"

"I don't unpack." Mitch said bluntly.

"You don't un- what do you mean you don't unpack?" Pat was speaking with alarm.

"I mean, I don't waste hours taking stuff out of a bag and putting it in the wardrobe, because if I did, I would just have to repeat the process when we leave, it's pointless."

"Okay no."

"No?" Mitch asked laughing.

"No. That's weird. And don't you waste the same amount of time you would spend unpacking looking for clothes every morning?"

"I have a system."

Pat didn't reply to this, instead he walked over to where Mitch's suitcases were laying on the ground and sat down. Unzipping the lid and opening the first bag he started to pull out Mitch's shirts and lay them neatly on the bed before going to get coat hangers from the wardrobe and hanging them up.

"You realise that you can't convince me that unpacking is worth the time and effort."

"Maybe not, but at least you can see how easy it is having your clothes organised in a wardrobe for the next two weeks." Mitch laughed before he moved over to sit opposite Pat and pulled a pair of jeans out of the bag.

An hour passed, and Mitch was hanging the last of his shirts in the wardrobe. When he turned around he saw Pat zipping up his last suitcase and putting it in the corner of the room before he walked over to where Mitch was standing. Just as he was about to say something smart about how the time they just spent unpacking could have been spent doing something much more productive, Mitch was stopped by Pat wrapping his arms around his waste and pressing a kiss to his lips. When he pulled back after a few moments, Pat was smiling.

"And what was that for?" Mitch asked as he returned Pat's smile.

"That was the other reason I came here." Pat spoke as he leaned back in and resumed the kiss.

**Present Day**

Zipping up his final suitcase, Mitch moved it to the other side of the room with his others and walked back to his bed, lying down. After a while he turned to the side and saw the box he had placed on the bedside table, sitting up and reaching for it, he opened the box, nutella filled doughnuts, Pat's favourite. He wasn't sure why he had bought them, Pat wasn't expecting anything, he wasn't even sure if he had bought them for Pat, he had just seen them, remembered his boyfriend liked them, and forked out the extra cash to get them.

Thinking about Pat's fondness for a ball of deep fried dough made Mitch feel the calmest he had been since he stepped of the flight. Maybe Bec was right, maybe he had been a bit snappy and maybe his anger hadn't actually been at the hotel for making them wait. Maybe Pat did just have his phone turned off, he was probably just talking to one of the coaches and had forgotten to turn it back on, because there was no way he would ignore a text from Mitch, was there? Because he wanted him to be in London with him, didn't he?

Mitch reached his hand into the box he was holding and pulled out one of the doughnuts, bringing it to his mouth he felt the cinnamon sugar that coated it stick to his lips and the chocolate hazelnut mixture that filled it slowly seep into his mouth. He finished one doughnut, and then went back for another, and another, until all that was left in the box he was holding was the residual cinnamon sugar. Standing up from where he had been seated on the bed, he closed the box and gently placed it in the bin near the door to his room. Wandering over to the bathroom he paused for a moment before walking inside and closing the door behind him.

When he emerged from the bathroom Mitch felt weaker, his throat burned from the acid that had risen with the doughnuts and he felt the long flight starting to catch up with him. Walking to the bed, he removed all but one pillow and lay down. He felt his eyelids begin to droop and just as he was about to allow himself to drift into what he knew would be a less than satisfactory sleep, he heard his phone buzz. Reaching out to where it had been placed on the bedside table, Mitch allowed the screen to light up and read the message that appeared,

_Hey, so sorry about not texting you straight back, completely forgot to turn my phone back on after the meeting this morning. Glad your flight landed safely. We're still about twenty minutes out from the hotel and have a few things to do before they'll let me be free. I'll text you my room number after everything's done, can't wait to see you! xx_

Mitch felt guilt swirl in his stomach, of course Pat had wanted him to come to England, of course he wanted to see him again, because there was no reason for him not to, they loved each other. Reaching out and putting his phone back on the bedside table Mitch allowed himself to fall back to the bed with a heavy thud, he closed his eyes, and for a moment, allowed himself to drift off into the darkness surrounding him.

***

Mitch didn't end up sleeping, at all, he wanted to, but there was something about switching time zones that made that task very difficult. So after two hours of laying on his back staring at the ceiling, the sound of his phone buzzing with a message was a welcomed relief, and that message was how he ended up where he was now, room 447, four floors above Mitch's own. Holding his arm out in front of him he knocked slowly, three times, and waited for an answer. When the door did open, Pat was standing there, a smile as wide as London Bridge on his face, dressed in jeans and a t shirt. The two stayed still until Pat jumped forward and wrapped his arms around Mitch's neck, ignoring the huff of surprise his action got in response. Finally loosening his grip, Pat grabbed hold of Mitch's hand and walked him into the room, the sound of the door closing behind them signalling they were in private, Pat leaned in and kissed Mitch softly on the lips before pulling away gently,

"I missed you so much."

"Yeah, I missed you too." Mitch responded feeling slightly relieved to hear his boyfriend say those words, though he wasn't entirely sure why.

"How was the flight? How's your room?"

"You mean the room I had to wait half an hour to get into."

"Really? In a place like this?"

"Yeah, but that isn't important, the main thing is that i'm here with you." Pat smiled and walked hand in hand with Mitch over to the bed in the centre of the room, turning the TV on they lay side by side and focused on the screen in front of them, falling into their regular routines.

After a while Pat turned to Mitch and lifted himself up slightly so he could place a kiss on his lips. The kisses started of being slow and soft, the two of them remembering what it was like to be with each other, not that they really forgot, but those kisses soon morphed into a blend of passion and heat. Before long, Pat was kissing down Mitch's neck, he had lost his shirt and the button on his jeans was undone. Both dressed only in their underwear, the two had manoeuvred so that Pat was on top of Mitch, grinding against him, making those little moaning noises that Mitch loved so much. The kissing continued and pretty soon Mitch's hand had worked its way to the waistband of Pat's boxers, just as it was about to enter, Pat sopped kissing and pulled back slightly so he was looking at Mitch,

"You okay?" Mitch asked, his voice slightly laced with concern.

"Yeah, yeah i'm good."

"Then why-?"

"I was just thinking that we don't have to do this now, you're here for the next few months, we have heaps of time."

"I know, but I want to, and i'm presuming you do too, so why wouldn't we?"

"Your not-" Pat gestured to Mitch's groin, "If you're not into it it's cool, you can tell me, I won't be upset."

Mitch sat up slightly before looking down and seeing what Pat was referring to, he felt the redness forming in his cheeks and quickly moved his legs over the side of the bed in preparation of getting up.

"I'm gonna go." He said picking up his jeans and starting to pull them on.

"No Mitch, you don't have to, it's okay." Pat said as he worked his way into the sitting position, "We can just hang out."

"Yeah, no, I just- I should- I'll see you tomorrow."

Mitch sounded flustered and had already pulled his shirt over his head and was opening the door when Pat called out,

"Come on Mitch, don't go."

The door shut, and Mitch proceeded to walk as quickly as he could in the direction of his room, a walk which felt ten times longer than when he had done it an hour earlier. When he made it back to his room he opened the door before shutting it behind him quickly, he slumped his back against the inside of the door and fell down into the sitting position, elbows on his knees and face in his hands. Mitch internally cursed whatever deity had decided that the night he was finally going to be with his boyfriend again was the night to cause problems in that department.

Looking up and to the side, Mitch's eyes caught sight of the rather large food basket the hotel had left in his room. Standing up, he walked over to the chest of drawers it was sitting on and took a closer look before bringing his hands to untie the ribbon that was holding the plastic covering together. Just as he was about to untie the final knot there was a knock at the door, Mitch paused momentarily before there was another knock and he walked to open the door, behind which he found Bec standing with a smile and what looked like a bag of marshmallows.

"So I thought that we could continue the tradition?"

Bec phrased her words as a question while holding up the bag of marshmallows and Mitch smiled, in the time they had been at home the two of them had gotten used to sitting down in front of the TV at night after the kids had gone to bed with a hot chocolate and marshmallows, talking about anything and everything.

"It's your first night with Shaun in over a month, you should be with him and the kids."

"Mabel's sleeping and Austin kind of kidnapped Shaun and is making him play dinosaurs, so really you'd be doing me a favour, and i'm sure that we could find something on TV to watch."

"Do you even have hot chocolate?" Bec smiled and reached into her pocket pulling out two sachets of hot chocolate waving them at Mitch, "Well, I mean if you're sure you want to hang out with me instead of Shaun, come on in."

Bec's smile widened as she handed the sachets and marshmallows to Mitch before kind of skipping over to the bed in the centre of the room and retrieving the TV remote from in front of the device. Mitch walked to the small kitchenette near the door and started to boil the kettle, when he turned around he caught sight of Bec sitting on the bed resting against the headboard, legs crossed, attempting to find something for the two of them to watch. Tipping the marshmallows out of the packet and into a bowl he found in a cupboard, Mitch took the hot chocolates and walked over to the other side of the bed, giving Bec one mug and placing one on the bedside table before walking back to get the marshmallows and sitting down himself. The two sat watching some soap opera Bec had found when Mitch spoke,

"I bet Austin was excited to see Shaun again."

"Yeah, he was over the moon. You should have seen him, his little eyes lit up, it was adorable."

"And Mabel?"

"It's a miracle she's sleeping, the whole switching time zones thing."

"Yeah jet lag's hard enough for an adult to deal with, let alone a baby."

"I'm sure we'll manage, in a couple of days everything will be back to normal." Bec brought her mug to her mouth and took a sip of her drink before reaching into the bowl and grabbing a handful of marshmallows and stuffing one in her mouth, "So, what are you doing here by yourself, I thought you would be with Pat."

"Yeah well- hold on, if you thought that I would be with Pat, why did you come here?"

"Um."

"Bec." Mitch said sternly, wanting an answer.

"Alright, Pat called me."

"What did he tell you?" Mitch sounded defensive.

"Nothing, he didn't tell me anything, just said that maybe you needed someone to talk to."

"So this was just some scheme to make me spill my guts?" Mitch gestured to the hot chocolate, marshmallows and television.

"No, I wanted to hang out."

"Really?"

"Yes, I was going to come by a bit later, but then Pat called and said that you weren't with him so I came earlier."

"Okay."

"Do you believe me?"

"Yeah."

"Good, now, do you want to tell me why you're here instead of smooching with Pat."

"Did you just say smooching?"

"Don't try and change the subject."

"It isn't important."

"I think that it is, Pat sounded genuinely worried on the phone."

"Okay then, it isn't something that I want to talk about."

"Okay."

And with that, the two returned to watching the TV in silence. Noticing that they had run out of hot chocolate, Bec took her own and Mitch's mug over to the kitchenette and filled them with tea before returning to the bed and resuming her place next to Mitch who was firmly focused on the new soap opera that had come onto the screen, after hesitating for a moment she spoke,

"Did something happen with Pat? Is that why you're not there?"

"You aren't going to give up, are you?"

"Probably not no."

"Why are you so hell bent on talking about this?"

"Because, if Pat was worried enough to tell me to come and talk to you, whatever happened must have been at least a little serious."

"Pat gets worried about everything. You were there when he came to Perth before the India series last year."

**Seven months ago**

Pat softly closed the door behind him and walked down the hallway and to the kitchen where he found Bec chopping vegetables, presumably for dinner in a couple of hours. Looking further he saw Shaun seated on the sofa with Austin in the living room, watching the TV.

"How's Mitch?" Bec asked putting down the knife and looking at Pat.

"His temperature's gone up again." Pat said sitting down on the stool opposite Bec.

"Can he have any more paracetamol?"

"Not for another two hours."

"What's he doing at the moment?"

"Sleeping."

"That's good, the more sleep he gets the better."

"I know."

"Wanna help with dinner?"

"Sure."

Pat moved to the other side of the counter and started to help Bec chop the remaining vegetables, after a couple of minutes he spoke again,

"Do you think we should take him to see a doctor?"

"That's a bit of an overreaction don't you think?" Pat turned towards the fridge to see Shaun had moved from the living room and was opening a bottle of water while giving Pat a look.

"How's it an overreaction?"

"He has a cold. It's not like he's on death's door."

"No, we think he has a cold, but it could be something much worse."

"He has a cold."

"And how can you be so sure?"

"He's been grumpy the past couple of days, snapping at everyone but Bec."

"What does that have to do with anything?!" Pat spoke slightly louder and with a hint of confusion.

"I've known him for twenty seven years, whenever he's getting sick he always gets grumpy in the days before."

"I've never noticed that."

"Yeah, because you didn't grow up with him."

"Maybe, but I have had sex with him." Pat snarled back.

"Okay boys, no need to get the measuring tapes out." Bec interrupted, "Let's just agree that you both know Mitch pretty well."

"Yeah, because seeing him naked a couple of times really matches twenty seven years of brotherly bonding doesn't it? Guess what Pat, you aren't the only one to have seen Mitch without clothes on!"

Shaun looked smug, but Bec shot him a glare and he continued speaking, "Fine, look all i'm trying to say is that Mitch doesn't need to see a doctor, load him full of cold and flu meds and in a couple of days he'll be right as rain."

"And what if you're wrong and he actually has some time sensitive disease?"

"Then i'll jump out of a plane without a parachute. The only thing you have to worry about with Mitch is him being a complete pain in the ass for the next few days and expecting everybody to wait on him hand and foot."

With that, Shaun left the kitchen and walked back to the living room confidently before resuming his place on the sofa next to Austin. Pat went back to chopping the remaining vegetables with Bec, who after a few moments spoke,

"I wouldn't be too worried about Mitch. But if he's not any better tomorrow or he gets heaps worse we'll take him to a doctor."

Pat smiled at her, "Thanks Bec." He was just about to go back to the chopping when he spoke again, "Shaun wouldn't actually jump out of a plane would he?"

Bec laughed, "No. But sometimes he gets that confident he's right about things I wouldn't put it past him to try."

**Present Day**

"Okay yes he worries about you, a lot, but that's only because he loves you." Bec said.

"So how do you know that this isn't just one of his worried for nothing moments." Mitch replied.

"The way he was speaking, it was different, he was genuinely concerned that something may be going on with you."

"He shouldn't be, i'm fine."

"You know you can tell me anything right?"

"I do, there just isn't anything to tell."

"Okay, you and Pat are fine, completely fine, nothing happened, you just mutually decided that after more than a month apart what's one more night in the scheme of things."

"Alright smarty pants."

"I just want to know what's going on Mitch, Pat isn't the only one who's worried. You were all angry when we arrived and now you're being all cagey and defensive."

Mitch saw the look in Bec's eye, it was one he had seen before, two and a half years ago, he sighed, "If I tell you, you have to promise not to tell another soul."

"You know that I won't."

"Okay. We were talking and stuff, you know saying how much we missed each other." Bec nodded, "Then we started kissing and that quickly progressed, but just as we were about to go further Pat stopped, and pointed out that I wasn't getting hard." Mitch blurted quickly.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Well, I mean, Pat isn't the kind of guy that would make a big deal out of something like that."

"No he isn't, he didn't, he was actually really sweet, but it was so embarrassing Bec, I just had to get out of there."

"So you came back here."

"I just wanted things to be perfect, but as usual I screw everything up! Pat probably doesn't even want me to be here anymore."

"Okay no, come on you haven't screwed everything up, and Pat wants you to be here, why else would he call me to come talk to you?"

"Obligation."

"No, it was because he loves you."

"Yeah, I guess." Mitch sounded deflated.

"Look, i'll text Pat now and tell him everything's okay, and tomorrow morning you can go over to his room and sort this whole situation out so you two can get back to normal."

"You really think so?"

"I know so. Now, let's get back to watching whatever this country claims to be a good soap opera."

Mitch smiled as he and Bec turned back to face the TV. He kept thinking about Pat though, how he had been so sweet and understanding, whereas Mitch had been irrational and only thinking about himself, sure it had been embarrassing, but that wasn't any reason to walk out on the boyfriend you haven't seen for almost six weeks. If Pat had wanted Mitch to be in England before this, he probably definitely didn't now. Mitch's eyes drifted over to the almost open food basket on the other side of the room and stayed there for much longer than they should have.

***

"Just a minute!" Mitch heard the call come from the inside of the room of the door he had knocked on about fifteen seconds ago. "Hello- oh hey hi."

"Hi."

"Do you wanna- you should come in." Pat was stumbling on his words.

"I can come back, if you're busy."

"It's okay, I was just watching some videos Justin sent me, nothing I can't do later."

"If you're sure."

"Yeah, course I am, come in."

Pat retreated back into his room and Mitch followed. Closing his laptop and walking over to the foot of the bed, Pat sat down and after hesitating for a moment, Mitch did the same.

"Do you have training today?" Mitch asked.

"This afternoon."

"Cool."

"Are you feeling better this morning?"

"Yeah, yeah i'm good. Look i'm sorry, I was a bit of a dick last night."

"You were a bit."

"I shouldn't have just cut and run."

"No, you shouldn't have."

"I wouldn't blame you if you were angry with me."

"I'm not angry with you Mitch, i'm upset. I've been looking forward to seeing you for the past two days, and I kind of thought that when we did see each other again, we would sleep in the same bed, not on opposite floors of the hotel."

"You don't think that I wanted that too?"

"I know that's what you wanted, but you left without saying more than five words."

"I was embarrassed Pat. I wanted everything to be perfect, but then you pointed out what you pointed out and it seemed easier to leave than stick around and sit in awkwardness."

"Things would have been perfect Mitch, because it would have been you and me. It wouldn't have mattered what we did or didn't do, as long as we were together."

"I'm sorry."

"I know you are."

"What can I do to make it up to you?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"You don't need to make it up to me, there's nothing to make up for, everything's good, we're good."

"Are you sure?"

"Yep, now, are you free to hang out?"

"I am."

"Good, what do you want to do?"

"We could watch a movie?"

"Sounds good."

Pat got up to get his laptop off the small table in the room while Mitch pulled back the covers on the bed and moved to get under them.

"You're on the wrong side." Pat noted as he turned around and started walking towards the bed.

"No i'm not, I sleep on the left."

"Yeah, but the bed's the opposite way to the one at home."

"Right, good point."

"Scoot over."

Mitch moved over to the other side of the bed as Pat got in and placed the laptop in front of them both before loading up a movie and settling in to watch. If Pat were being completely honest, he would admit that he wasn't really that focused on the movie, rather the fact that he was finally with Mitch again after all these weeks, and it felt amazing.


	7. A Day Off Together

Pat wasn't stupid, he knew that when a day off came around during an international cricket tournament, you had to take it with both hands, and that was what he planned to do. His plans for the day were simple, he was going to spend it with Mitch, every single moment, because it had been too long since they had last spent the day together. It wasn't like he had a strict schedule they needed to stick to, there never really was one when they were hanging out, they would probably just end up walking around Nottingham and looking at random things.

Pat suddenly heard a knock at the door and immediately jumped to go and answer it, once he did he saw Mitch standing outside and looking down at his phone intently and typing something before looking up and smiling.

"Hey." Pat said returning Mitch's infectious smile.

"Hey, so Bec just texted, apparently her and Shaun are taking the kids to a field to see a bunch of deer."

"Deer?"

"Yep."

"Did you want to go and see the deer?"

"No, God no, I hate the things."

"Right, is there a reason for that?"

"Not really, just don't like them. Are you ready to go?"

"Yep let's get out of here."

Pat returned into the room briefly to get his jacket and wallet before picking up his phone on the way out and closing his door. He walked with Mitch through the floor of the hotel and in the direction of the lifts, which was a fair way away considering Pat's room was on the opposite end of the hotel floor. About halfway to the lifts, Mitch was in the middle of explaining the soap opera he had gotten hooked on since he had been in England when the two were confronted by Josh and Mitch Starc walking towards them in what seemed to be a rather heated argument.

"I already told you, no, I am not playing golf with you." Josh said.

"Why not?" Mitch Starc asked in response.

"You know why, I've told you hundreds of times, it's a stupid game, you literally hit a ball and try to get it in a hole."

"There's a bit more skill involved than that."

"Well I can't see where that skill would come into it."

"Come on, you know that I like it."

"And I don't, you know that, I honestly don't know why you keep asking me to play with you, you know what the answer's going to be."

"Okay fine, you don't have to play golf."

"But you're still going to?"

"I mean yeah, I was invited, I think it would be a bit rude not to turn up."

"A bit rude- oh for god sakes."

Josh turned around and started to walk in the opposite direction towards the lifts as Mitch Starc turned around throwing his hands up and calling after him,

"Josh, come on, where are you going?"

No response came and Mitch Starc just turned back to where Pat and Mitch were standing in the hallway, he looked confused as Pat turned to Mitch and gave him a look.

"I'll go see if he's okay." Mitch said as he moved from Pat's side.

"Okay, i'll meet you in the lobby after?" Pat replied.

"Yeah."

Mitch started to walk down the hallway and caught up with Josh just as he was turning the corner. As this was happening, Mitch Starc was looking intently at Pat who was looking straight back before the former spoke,

"Okay, I don't even know what that was about."

"Are you being sarcastic?" Pat asked.

"Sarcastic? No, why would I be being sarcastic?"

"Okay wow, so you genuinely don't know why Josh is upset?"

"No."

"Wow."

"Do you maybe want to give me a hint?"

"You practically just told him that you'd rather spend your day off with a bunch of guys you've been seeing everyday for the past two months than with him."

"Okay, I definitely didn't say that."

"You kinda did."

"How? I asked him to come with me."

"Yes, you asked Josh to go and play golf, a game that everyone knows he hates, with about ten other people."

"I'm still not sure what you're getting at."

"Okay, let me put it as simply as I can possibly can for you. Your boyfriend wanted to spend the day with you, only you, no one else, doing something that you both like."

"Oh, right."

"Now that you have this information, are you going to go apologise?"

"Probably best to leave it for a couple of hours. When he's in a mood like that, it's best to leave him to cool off, you've seen what happens if anyone tries to talk him when he's angry."

"I have a few memories."

**Six months ago**

"Why is Josh sitting in the corner by himself?" Pat asked as he walked through the tea room in the direction of Mitch Starc.

"He's pissed off."

"At what?"

"Everyone and everything."

"Right then, should someone go and make sure he's okay."

"Not a good idea, he prefers to be alone when he's in a mood, he's fine, just needs time to cool off."

"What exactly happened to make him this mad?"

"No clue. He mumbled something about the umpire."

"The umpire?"

"Like I said, I really have no clue."

Pat was just about to reply when his boyfriend came up behind him and spoke, "Hey."

"Hey."

"So Mitch what's up with Josh?"

"He's grumpy." Pat didn't even give Mitch the chance to answer for himself noticing the frustrated look that came on his face when the question was asked.

"At what?"

"Life in general it would seem."

"Okay then. Did you want something to eat?" Mitch turned his attention to Pat.

"Yeah, just pick anything and i'll be there in a minute."

"Cool."

Mitch smiled and walked off in the direction of the food leaving Pat and Mitch Starc.

"Thanks." Mitch spoke with gratitude.

"All good."

"Did you need me for something else, or were you just here to ask about Josh?"

"Yeah, I actually needed to talk to you about-"

"Oh god, that's not good."

"What?"

Pat turned to where Mitch's eyes were directed at where Josh was sitting, Travis Head approaching him and seemingly saying something. All of a sudden, Josh's loud voice filled the smallish room.

"Why, why can't people not just leave other people alone?!"

Josh promptly stood up and stormed out of the room, and after looking slightly shocked for a moment, Travis made his way over to where Pat and Mitch were standing.

"Mitch, what's up with Josh?"

"For the love of- do I have a sign on my head or something? Josh is fine, he just wants people to leave him the fuck alone!"

"Sorry I asked." Travis said before walking away and Mitch sighed loudly.

"Should you go after him?" Pat asked.

"No. When he's storming out of rooms you definitely need to leave him to be by himself."

**Present Day**

"I'll talk to him later, do something special tonight." Mitch spoke.

"That sounds like a good idea." Pat responded.

"Look I should go, thanks Pat."

"It's all good."

Pat smiled as Mitch walked off and he continued in the direction of the lifts to meet his boyfriend in the lobby. When he arrived he saw Mitch sitting in one of the chairs near the entrance and as he walked over Mitch stood up and the two went out the door. They walked down the street for a bit before Pat spoke,

"So how's Josh?"

"He's okay, I think he just needs time to cool off."

"Yeah. So what did you want to do today?"

"I don't know. Are there actually any sights to see here?"

"I don't know, hold on." Pat pulled his phone from his pocket and started typing and scrolling on the screen intently, looking back up at Mitch after a few moments, "So apparently there's a heap of museums and castles, and some cave thing."

"I mean, the cave thing doesn't sound all that bad."

"Alrighty then, to the City of Caves we go."

***

"That was shit." Mitch spoke as he emerged from the exit of the cave.

"Come on, it wasn't that bad." Pat followed.

"We got lost three times!"

"I told you, we weren't lost."

"We were Pat."

Mitch walked ahead and towards the reasonably peaceful street ahead of him, Pat following diligently behind him.

"Okay, we may have taken a couple of wrong turns, but at least we made it out."

"Yeah, half an hour after we should have."

"At least we get why they call it a city now." Pat laughed, something which Mitch didn't return, "Are you okay?"

"I'm just-" Mitch didn't know how to explain the anxious feeling that had settled in his stomach, it was the same one that had been there for pretty much all of the past month, "I'm good." he lied, "What's next on the agenda?"

"Don't know, do you just want to roam the streets for a bit?"

"Sounds good."

Mitch and Pat started to walk the streets together, looking at whatever they found interesting, it was after about twenty minutes that they had ended up in a street full of shops and Pat stopped suddenly, startling Mitch.

"What, what's wrong?" Mitch asked slight worry in his voice.

"I just figured out our next stop."

Pat was smiling as he pulled Mitch by the arm into the ice cream shop he had stopped in front of and five minutes later the two of them were sitting at a small table across from one another outside the store.

"Do you want some?" Pat asked gesturing towards the cup of ice cream in front of him.

"Nah, i'm good." Mitch replied.

"You sure? I mean, you love ice cream."

"Yeah, i'm just not hungry."

"Okay if you're sure."

But Mitch wasn't sure. The anxious feeling which had settled in his stomach was becoming more and more prominent and he knew that eating the ice cream would probably make it go away for a while, but he was with Pat, and he knew that eating a little bit of ice cream would quickly turn into a lot, and that would really ruin the one day they got to have together. Instead he decided to settle in silence and try to redirect his thoughts, but he quickly found his eyes moving in the direction of the ice cream Pat was eating.

"Here." Pat pushed the half full ice cream cup towards Mitch.

"Pat." Mitch spoke sternly.

"Come on Mitch I can see you looking at it, and strawberry's your favourite."

"Seriously Pat."

"Can you just have some, please? Because if I have to eat the rest of this, i'm probably going to be sick."

That last sentence hit a nerve with Mitch and all of a sudden he felt his anger rise to the surface, "I said I didn't want it and I still don't want it, so why can't you just leave it!"

"Okay, alright, i'll leave it." Pat sounded slightly shocked at the outburst.

"Good."

Pat took the spoon from the cup and brought it to his mouth, eyes not leaving Mitch who now had a rather angry look on his face. They sat in silence for the next ten minutes before they left the table and resumed walking the streets. They were walking in silence for a while, Mitch slightly ahead of Pat until a yelp stopped him in his tracks.

"Ow, fuck me, ow."

"Pat!" Mitch called with worry turning back and seeing Pat sitting on the ground, "What happened?"

"I stepped in a hole, rolled my ankle."

"Jesus." Mitch said as he looked around at the surroundings, "Come sit on this rock."

"It's okay Mitch, i'm fine."

"Don't be stupid Pat, you have a match to play in two days, just sit on the rock so I can take a look."

Mitch moved to help Pat up and sit him on the rock, taking off his shoe and sock he started to check his ankle.

"I don't think anything's broken."

"I didn't think it was, thanks for checking." Pat smiled and reached for Mitch's hand, grabbing hold of it and squeezing gently he felt Mitch do the same in return.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For snapping at you. You didn't deserve it."

"Not that there's really anything to forgive, but I forgive you, and i'm sorry too, I shouldn't have pushed you."

Mitch shook his head softly, how could Pat be so kind and understanding when he had completely gone off his head at him. The fact that he was being like that only intensified the anxious and guilty feelings which were swirling around in his stomach.

"Does your ankle feel any better?" he asked in an attempt to redirect the feelings.

"A bit."

"I think that we should just call it a day."

"No, we were supposed to spend the whole day together, it's not even that bad."

"Again, you have a match in two days, you should rest it to make sure you're one hundred percent."

"But-"

"We can still spend the rest of the day together, we can watch a movie or something, better still we can watch my new favourite TV show."

"Yeah, okay."

"Do you think you can walk? It is a fair way."

"I don't know, you may need to carry me."

"May I? Good thing I've been working out then isn't it."

"I mean yeah, you wouldn't want to drop me, I do have a match in two days." Pat laughed and this time Mitch did share the response.

"Come on you." Mitch extended his hand and offered it to Pat who used it as leverage to pull himself to his feet and after a moment started to walk along the path in the direction of the hotel, leaning on Mitch, though more for dramatic effect than anything.

Half an hour of walking later and Pat and Mitch had arrived back at the entrance of the hotel they were staying at, walking through the lobby and getting into the lift they made the short journey to their floor before stepping out into the hallway. Pat leaned back against the wall and dramatically sighed before looking to Mitch with a sly smile and speaking,

"Okay, now you really will have to carry me."

"Seriously Pat, you're telling me that you managed to walk all the way back to the hotel but you can't walk the hundred something metres to the room?"

"I'm tired, and mortally wounded. Please?"

"Mortally wounded?"

"Yes. Be a good boyfriend, carry me, please?"

"I can't guarantee that you won't get more hurt during this endeavour but fine, get over here."

Pat smiled as he walked over to where Mitch was standing. Mitch picked him up and held him in the position to do a bridal style carry while Pat wrapped his arms around his boyfriend's neck.

"Okay, when did you get so fucking heavy?"

"I'm not!"

"You are, like i'm struggling here."

"Just start walking you idiot."

"A piece of advice Patrick, don't start making fun of the man who could drop you at any moment." Pat laughed and Mitch started to walk, albeit with difficulty, in the direction of his hotel room. Twenty metres into the walk and Pat had broken out into what Mitch considered hysterical laughter,

"Why on earth are you laughing?"

"You're struggling so much."

"Yeah, I don't think you realise how heavy you are."

"Maybe you're just weak." Pat was still laughing.

"Can you just stop laughing, or I seriously might drop you."

"You wouldn't."

"Well not on purpose no, but you being in hysterics makes this task that much more difficult."

"I don't even want to know what's going on here."

Mitch turned around to see Shaun, Bec and the kids walking towards him and Pat, rather confused looks on their faces, and Shaun speaking.

"Hey, how were the deer?" Pat asked with a smile.

"Pat, if you're going to start a conversation, you're gonna need to get down." Mitch spoke and Pat frowned before allowing Mitch to lower him to his feet, "Thank the lord I can feel my arms again." Pat started laughing once again.

"So, there deer?" Pat turned towards Bec and Shaun.

"Yeah, they were cool." Bec said, "You two look cosy, what's the whole bridal style thing about?"

"Pat stepped in a hole, rolled his ankle." Mitch chimed in.

"He what?!" Shaun spoke loudly more out of concern for the team than anything.

"Relax, it's all good, i'm fine, completely fine." Pat said.

"Completely fine? You told me you were mortally wounded!" Mitch spoke.

"I may have exaggerated a bit."

"A bit?"

"Yeah."

"Well, we should get back to our room, this one needs a nap." Bec gestured to a rather dreary Austin beside her.

"Okay, see you later." Mitch spoke.

"Yeah, have fun with- whatever this is." Bec and Shaun walked off in the direction of their room taking the kids with them and Pat turned back to Mitch smiling.

"Come on then, pick me up."

"Oh no, you can walk."

"Come on Mitch, please, my ankle actually does kind of hurt."

"Then hop." Mitch called, not looking back, as he was walking away from Pat and in the direction of his room. Five minutes after he had gotten to his room and was sitting on his bed there was a knock at the door and Mitch smiled before getting up to answer it.

"You bastard, you absolute bastard." Pat said as he walked past Mitch and into the room.

"Don't be so salty, it doesn't suit you."

"I don't care if it suits me or not. You made me walk all the way back here with a busted ankle!"

"It was less than one hundred metres, and you're completely fine remember?"

"Don't go using my words against me. You'll just have to spend the afternoon making it up to me."

"And how am I going to do that?"

"Cuddles."

"Cuddles?"

"Yep, for the next however many hours, we are going to lie on that bed, watching whatever shitty soap opera you claim to be the best thing since home and away, and you are going to cuddle me."

"You do know that that isn't really much of a punishment."

"Try saying that when you need to pee and I refuse to move."

***

Mitch leaned back against the cold tiled wall of the bathroom and brought his knees to his chest, the sound of the toilet flushing filled the room as he swallowed hard. He had been in his room by himself for about an hour and a half after Pat had left, and the minute his boyfriend had walked out the door, all the anxious and guilty feelings he had been attempting to suppress all day had risen to the surface and he quickly became overwhelmed. When the sound of the toilet finally stopped it was almost instantly replaced by that of a knocking at the door. Mitch slowly stood up and splashed water on his face before leaving the bathroom and walking to answer the knock at the door.

"Hi." Pat smiled as he leaned in to kiss Mitch on the lips, taking him by surprise, "I brought dinner."

"Dinner?"

"Yeah. Why, is that a problem?"

"No, it's just we've been together all day, I kind of figured you would want a break, spend the night alone."

"I could never want a break from you, besides, I missed you."

Mitch smiled and moved aside so that Pat could enter the room, "What's on the menu then?"

"Chinese food that if the coaches found out I was eating, well they would definitely murder me."

"Sounds good." Mitch laughed softly through the burning feeling that was in his throat.

Pat moved to get plates and serve the food and pretty soon the two of them were seated opposite one another at the small table in the corner of Mitch's hotel room.

"What's wrong?" Pat asked with concern.

"Nothing, why?" Mitch responded.

"You've been pushing that piece of chicken around that plate with your fork for the past ten minutes."

"Sorry, just not really that hungry."

"You haven't been hungry all day, are you getting sick? You do look a little pale."

Mitch's stomach flipped, "I just don't feel great."

"You should have told me."

"It really isn't that major, i'll be fine after a good night's sleep."

"Okay." Pat said as he stood up and took Mitch's plate and his own over to the sink.

"Pat finish eating, you don't have to stop because of me."

"It's fine, I'm full anyway."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive, now, find something interesting on TV for us to watch." Pat said as he went back to sorting out the dishes, moving to tip the leftover food in the bin he spoke again, "Did you have cupcakes?"

"Huh?" Mitch asked as he looked up from the TV screen.

"There's an empty packet of cupcakes in the bin."

Mitch paused for a moment before answering, "Oh, I found the packet in one of the cupboards earlier, I figured I should probably throw it out." he lied through his teeth.

"The cleaners actually left rubbish in one of the cupboards?"

Mitch couldn't tell if Pat didn't believe him or if he was just disgusted, "Guess so."

"You should complain, that really isn't acceptable for a hotel with such a high rating." Mitch silently breathed a sigh of relief, it wasn't like Pat could actually know where the cupcakes really came from, or what happened to them.

"It's fine, it really wasn't that much of a hassle to get rid of it."

"Still." Pat was walking over to the bed where Mitch was sitting and searching through the TV channels.

"Did you have any preference about what you wanted to watch?"

"Not really."

"Okay then, well, welcome to the rather large world of British soap operas."

Mitch smiled as he worked his way back on the bed to be leaning up against the headboard, Pat followed and was soon nestled in against Mitch's chest in his arms. An hour passed and Pat started to notice that Mitch was yawning more regularly, looking at the clock, he saw that it was a quarter to ten.

"Bed time?" Pat questioned.

"Mmmm?" Mitch responded drearily.

"Come on, let's get ready to sleep."

"Are you staying?"

"Yeah, we did say we were going to spend the whole day together." Pat said as he wormed his off the bed and allowed Mitch to do the same. 

"You don't have your pyjamas." Mitch pointed out while stretching.

"I'll sleep in my undies."

"As much as I would enjoy that sight, you'll freeze, you can borrow some of my pyjamas."

"Thanks."

Pat moved over to the chest of drawers in the room and pulled out two pairs of pyjamas, one for Mitch and the other for himself. Quickly showering, he emerged from the bathroom and allowed Mitch to get ready as well before the two of them were unmaking the bed together.

"You can be the little spoon." Pat stated as he moved a pillow.

"Really? You're letting me be the little spoon? You love being the little spoon." Mitch responded slightly shocked.

"You're not feeling good, and when you're not feeling good, you're the little spoon, it's basic relationship etiquette Mitch."

Mitch chuckled before pulling back the blankets and getting under them, Pat following his actions. He rolled onto his right arm and allowed Pat to lie behind him and wrap his arms around his waist. Pressing a soft kiss into the side of Mitch's neck, Pat allowed his head to drop to the pillow and tightened his grip around his boyfriend's waist.

"You know that I love you right?" Mitch asked.

"Yeah, I love you too." 

Mitch allowed himself to smile at the response from Pat and felt himself relax ever so slightly.


	8. Time Gone By

Night had fallen over the city of London, the streets were illuminated with the city lights and in a hotel not far from the city centre was where Bec and Shaun were in their room getting ready for bed at just past ten.

"Did you see Pat and Mitch earlier?" Bec asked whilst she was applying her hand cream and looking down at Shaun who was already in bed reading a magazine.

"When they were chasing each other through the halls of the hotel? Or when Pat was attempting to jump on Mitch’s back and they both fell to the ground in hysterics?"

"Mitch seemed so happy." Bec said as she climbed under the covers on the bed and rested up against the headboard next to Shaun.

"Well when you're with the person you love you're gonna be happy."

"I know that, he seems like he's in a really good place though."

"This coming from the woman who three months ago was convinced he was having a relapse." Shaun moved to place the magazine next to him on the bedside table and turned to face Bec, a smile on his face.

"Okay, so I got a bit caught up looking for signs that weren't there. But when you think about how far he's actually come in the past two and a bit years, it's incredible."

**Two years and seven months ago**

As Mitch turned the key in the door and opened it the cool gush from the air conditioner was a welcomed relief from the searing Perth heat. Placing his keys on the side table in the entrance of the house he made his way towards the living room where he was immediately confronted by Bec and Shaun sitting side by side on the sofa looking straight at him.

"Come sit Mitch." Bec gestured to the armchair beside the sofa.

"What's going on? Why are you two staring at me like that? Did I do something? I know that I definitely remembered to unpack the dishwasher this morning." Mitch started to ramble.

"Just come and sit mate." Shaun spoke.

"Okay, now i'm worried, did someone die?" Mitch walked across the living room and sat in the armchair, Bec and Shaun turning so they could face him, "Can someone please tell me what this is all about."

"No one died." Bec said.

"Okay good, now can you answer my question?"

"We think that you should get yourself out there." Bec gestured in the direction of the front yard.

"What, in this heat? Bec it's like forty degrees!"

"Not like that. You should show the world what you have to offer."

"I'm not following."

"We think that you should go on a date." Shaun intervened. 

"Oh no. No, no, no, no, no. Not happening."

"Why not?" Bec queried.

"Because I don't want to, like really don't want to."

"Come on, you have heaps of great qualities, and I mean you aren't that bad looking."

"Would it really be the worse thing in the world to see what's on offer?" Shaun spoke again.

"Yes." Mitch replied bluntly.

"Wasn't a big part of your recovery embracing everything, the real you?"

"It was. And I can do that- I have done that- alone, in my bedroom, over the internet."

"Porn can only get you so far Mitch."

"Yeah, far enough for me to be satisfied."

"Eventually you're gonna have to get out there mate."

"Yeah eventually, not now."

Cut to two days later and Mitch was pushing a trolley through the aisles of Coles with Bec. The two were going about their business, Mitch picking food up off the shelves and Bec crossing the item off the shopping list. Mitch was picking up a packet of biscuits and turning back to the trolley when Bec suddenly spoke,

"He's pretty cute."

"What?"

"That guy over there." Bec pointed to the end of the aisle where a blonde haired man was browsing the shelves, "He's good looking."

"Seriously Bec?"

"What?"

"I said I didn't want to go on a date."

"I just said he was cute, but if you did want to talk to him, or ask him out-"

"No Bec, no."

"Okay, alright. What about him?" This time Bec pointed to a slightly darker haired man who was walking past them.

Mitch looked the man up and down subtly, pausing when he saw his hands, "He's married!"

"No he's- oh yep there's the ring." Bec frowned and Mitch just shook his head and continued walking.

Another three days passed and on a rather fine evening in Perth Mitch was seated in front of the TV next to Shaun, who was more focused on his iPad than the AFL match that was playing. Bec had been in the kitchen getting stuff ready for dinner but was now walking behind the sofa and stopping behind Shaun.

"What are you looking at?" She asked looking at the iPad over Shaun's shoulder.

"Mitch's dating profile." He replied in a rather nonchalant manner.

"My what?!" Mitch spoke loudly and with shock.

"Your dating profile."

"I don't have a dating profile!"

"Apparently you do. 'Twenty five. All round good bloke. I play a bit of cricket. You can get caught in my slips.', Shaun!" Bec sounded horrified as she read aloud over Shaun’s shoulder.

"What? That's some of my best work."

"It's disgusting is what it is."

"Please tell me you didn't actually make me a dating profile Shaun." Mitch spoke.

"I did, and I found some potential candidates for you to look at."

"I don't want to look at them."

"Just look at this one." Shaun shoved the iPad in Mitch's face and he had no choice but to take it and look at the screen, "I mean men don't turn me on, at all, but that is a fine specimen right there."

"Pretty sure that's a catfish."

"Okay then, what about this one?" Shaun said as he swiped onto another profile.

"I'm a master on the streets and a demon in the sheets." Mitch read aloud, "That's just- where did you even find these people?"

"My guess is he looked for the ones he found the most entertaining." Bec intervened but just as Shaun was about to reply the sound of Austin crying filled the house and Bec went to go and console the crying child.

"Can you just delete it Shaun." Mitch said.

"Come on, some of these are legit, if you just look through them I think you'll find a suitable candidate."

"I don't want to look through them and I don't want to find a suitable candidate."

Shaun turned off the iPad and placed it aside before turning back to Mitch, "Why are you so against the idea of going on a date?"

"I'm not."

"Every time Bec or I bring it up you get all sheltered and defensive."

"I'm not object to the idea, I just don't think i'm going to find my soulmate in Coles or on some weird dating website."

"Who said anything about finding your soulmate? This is about seeing what's out there, finding out what you like and what you don't. No one's suggesting that you go out and sleep with twelve different guys, just meet a couple and see where things go."

"I don't want to meet a couple and see where things go."

"Why? Why do you have such a problem with the concept?"

"Because then I'd have to admit that-" Mitch stopped.

"That what?"

"That i'm-" He stumbled.

"That your what?"

"That i'm gay, alright, I'd have to admit that i'm gay."

Shaun paused for a moment, "You've never said that before."

"Not even to my counsellor."

Shaun suddenly leaned in and pulled Mitch into a hug, after a few moments he leaned back and looked his younger brother in the eyes.

"I am so proud of you Mitch."

**Present Day**

"He has come a remarkably long way. It's good to see him being able to be himself." Shaun said.

"You know you're a big part of that, why he's been able to come so far." Bec spoke.

"Not really, I mean, you were there for him so much more than I was, and his counsellor really was amazing."

"Shaun, he trusted you enough to be the first person he told he was gay, not me, or his counsellor, you. You're a better brother than you give yourself credit for."

"Thanks."

"You don't need to thank me, i'm only telling the truth."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

With that, the two began to settle into the bed for the night, Shaun placing a soft kiss on Bec's forehead before they both lay down and their heads hit the pillow. The cool London air was circulating the room through the open window as they wrapped themselves in each others arms.

***

"It's gonna get infected." Mitch stated.

"It's not gonna get infected." Pat replied from where he was kneeling in front of Mitch who was sitting on the end of the bed.

"It is, that carpet was not clean. Ow! That stings!" Mitch yelped as Pat moved the antiseptic soaked cotton bud across the substantial graze on his boyfriend's knee. 

"Not that it was ever going to, but if you want to stop it from getting infected, you're gonna have to let me put this stuff on it."

"Okay, but do you have to use so much? There has to be half a bottle of the shit on it by now."

"Stop exaggerating. Now stay still while I go and get the band aid."

Pat stood up from his position on the floor and walked towards the small kitchenette where on the bench was a rather large band aid to cover the wound. Mitch was looking up at him as he proceeded to speak,

"How is it me who's being told not to exaggerate, it's your fault this happened."

"And how do you figure that?"

"I wouldn't have fallen if you hadn't have gone all rogue and tried to jump on my back."

"Hey I gave you warning."

"Yeah, all of five seconds."

By this point Pat had made his way back in front of Mitch and was carefully placing the band aid over the graze and sticking down the edges before looking up and smiling, "All done. Sorry, I don't have any jelly beans."

"Oh fuck up."

"But for being such a brave little soul, I shall reward you in other ways."

"Oh yeah, like what?"

"Well I was thinking that I might-" Pat leaned in and kissed Mitch on the lips.

"Really, because i'd like it if you-" Mitch leaned in and kissed Pat on the lips.

The two continued kissing softly with Pat moving to sit next to Mitch on the end of the bed after a few minutes.Ten minutes later and the two of them had worked their way up the bed so their heads were in line with the pillows. The kissing had become deeper and Pat's hand had found its way into the front of Mitch's pants, staying there as the embrace became more heated. Pat was in the middle of attempting to undo the button on Mitch's jeans when the latter pulled back slightly and spoke,

"Mmmm, Pat?"

"Second drawer on your side."

"I know where you keep the condoms, no, are you sure you wanna do this?"

"Yes i'm sure, why, don't you?"

"I do, god I really do, but you have a match tomorrow."

"That doesn't matter." Pat leaned back in to resume kissing but Mitch once again pulled back gently.

"It does Pat, it's against New Zealand, you need to be on your game."

"I will be, tomorrow, tonight I wanna be with you."

"That's a bit cute, isn't it?"

"Please Mitch." Pat smiled and tightened his grip in the front of Mitch's pants, "I'll do that thing you like, you know, the one where I-" Pat moved his hand slightly and Mitch moaned.

"Mmmm, okay, just, don't stop."

"I wouldn't dream of it." Pat smiled again as he continued to move his hand and Mitch continued to moan in response.

Some time later Pat and Mitch were naked on the bed, covered only by a thin sheet and breathing heavily, their hands entwined.

"I mean, that was fun." Pat spoke.

"Yeah, it was." Mitch sounded dreary and dazed.

"You all good?"

"You ask that every time we have sex."

"Yeah, because I care about you."

"I'm all good Pat."

"Good."

"And you? You all good?"

"How could I not be? I love you."

"I love you too." Mitch yawned and Pat smiled.

"You always get so sleepy afterwards."

"Mmm sorry."

"Don't apologise it's cute, makes me love you even more than I already do." 

"Really?"

"Yeah, if we exclude that one time you fell asleep five minutes into the foreplay."

"Don't bring that up."

"I thought you were dead."

"You were the one who completely disregarded the fact that we had been playing cricket for five straight days because you wanted to do it! What did you expect? I was exhausted!"

Pat laughed at the outburst and allowed his hold on Mitch's hand to tighten, "That's another reason I love you so much."

"What?"

"You always know how to make me laugh."

Mitch leaned over and kissed Pat softly on the lips, pulling back after a few moments and smiling. After a while Pat had made his way out of the bed and was pulling on a pair of trackies before chucking another in the direction of Mitch.

"Are these mine?" Mitch asked curiously examining the navy blue trackies Pat had thrown him.

"They could be." Pat replied innocently.

"They are! I left these at your place!"

"Yeah, you're not getting them back."

"I kind of figured I wasn't. It's fine, I have about six of your shirts at home that you aren't ever going to see again." Mitch smiled as he pulled on the track pants he had been holding and Pat started to walk over to him.

"That's hot." Pat stated casually and Mitch gave him a confused look, "You, going commando, it's hot."

"Is it just?" Mitch smiled.

"Yep, makes me wish I never gave you the pants."

"You're like a horny teenager tonight." 

Pat smiled as he moved onto the bed and straddled Mitch, knees on either side of his boyfriends thighs, arms coming to wrap themselves around his neck as he leaned in to passionately kiss the man in front of him. "You know that you love it." He said pulling back.

"Maybe a little bit."

Pat brought his arms down and rested both his hands on Mitch's shoulders, "I had fun this afternoon, probably the most fun since I've been over here."

"You mean an afternoon with me actually managed to beat all those nights you stayed in playing scrabble?" Mitch joked.

"They were a very close second, I mean, how can someone not enjoy being demolished by seven hundred odd points because their opponent has a tendency to cheat every single round?"

"Oh my god. You're still angry about that, aren't you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." Pat said as he moved himself into Mitch's left side and reached for the remote to turn on the TV. As the sound of a movie starting filled the room, Pat allowed his head to rest on Mitch's bare shoulder beside him and smiled, this is where he wanted to be.


	9. Freak Accident

"Oh fuck!"

That was all Pat heard as the ball left his hand and bounced once before making its way to the other end of the crease.

"You right?" Pat called out as he looked up at Shaun who quickly shook his head before clutching at his wrist. "Shit."

***

"I'm so sorry Shaun."

"Honestly Pat it's fine, it was an accident, you couldn't have controlled what happened."

"Still, now you're out of the World Cup and you have to have surgery- when are you having the surgery?"

"About an hour and a half."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"You don't need to do anything, it's all good."

"Seriously Shaun, i'll do anything, just let me make this up to you."

"Well, if you're that keen-" Shaun started to speak but was interrupted by the door opening to reveal Mitch, Bec and the kids who proceeded to walk into the room, Austin quickly scurrying over and climbing onto the bed next to Shaun. "Why don't you and Mitch take the kids back to the hotel."

"Oh no, i'm not leaving." Mitch stated.

"Mitch you know that I want you to stay, but Bec's here and the kids really need a nap and you know their routines better than anyone."

"I can call you when the surgery's finished." Bec said.

"I'm really not sure, what if something happens?"

"Nothing's likely to happen it's a really straightforward operation. Besides, the kids need their favourite uncle and the hospital really isn't a place for them to be in for too long."

"Okay fine, but you have to promise me the minute you know anything you'll call." Mitch turned to Bec.

"I promise I will."

"Okay."

"Right, if Mabel gets hungry just use the formula, there's bottles on top of the cupboard and the formula mix is next to them, but you've fed her before so you know what to do." Bec said as she handed Mitch the baby, "Austin, come on sweetie time to go."

"Where are we going?" Austin said from where he was snuggled into Shaun's side.

"You and Mabel are going to go back to the hotel with uncle Mitch and Pat."

"No! I want to stay with daddy!"

"I'm okay buddy. You go and help uncle Mitch and Pat look after Mabel like a good big brother." Shaun spoke.

"Okay."

"Good boy."

"Come on Austin." Pat said with an outstretched hand as Austin worked his way off the bed and grabbed hold the hand on offer.

"Will you play dinosaurs with me?"

"I would love to play dinosaurs with you. Come on let's go." Pat smiled as he led Austin towards the door, waving to Bec on his way out and following Mitch down the corridors towards the exit.

***

The four of them had been back in Shaun and Bec's hotel room for about an hour and a half. Pat and Austin were sitting in the middle of the floor surrounded by a variety of stuffed toy dinosaurs and Mitch was attempting to settle Mabel in Bec and Shaun's room, her crying filling the rest of the room.

"So who's this?" Pat said as he held up a blue and yellow toy dinosaur.

"That's Leo." Austin replied with what was a mixture of a serious expression and a smile on his face.

"Okay, so is Leo friends with this dinosaur?" Pat held up a slightly smaller purple and green dinosaur and Austin nodded, "Right, so what's his name?"

"He doesn't have one."

"He doesn't? That's not right, should we give him one?"

"Yes."

"What should we call him?"

"You can choose."

"Can I?" Austin nodded smiling, "Okay, how about we call him- Sam, is that a good name?"

"Yes."

"So what are Sam and Leo going to do today?"

"Have a picnic."

"That sounds fun." Pat said as he saw Mitch emerge from Shaun and Bec's room with a rather tired and frustrated look on his face, Mabel was still crying in the background. "Hey Austin, why don't you go and get a pillow from your room so that Sam and Leo have something to sit on."

"Okay." Austin said as he smiled and got up before walking off in the direction of his room.

"Is she not going down?" Pat asked as Mitch walked towards him.

"No." Mitch replied looking down at Pat who was still seated on the floor.

"You've fed her?"

"Yeah, and burped her and checked her nappy."

"Is she running a temperature?"

"No, I checked, she's fine, I just don't understand why she won't settle."

"Maybe she's overtired?"

"Yeah, but I tried rocking her for like ten minutes and it did nothing, she just kept screaming."

"Purple elephant." Austin said as he walked back over to where Pat was sitting with a pillow from his bed. Mitch and Pat both looked at each other slightly confused.

"Sorry Austin, what did you say?" Pat asked turning to face the child who had resumed his seat and had picked up Leo.

"Purple elephant." Mitch and Pat were equally as confused.

"Purple elephant?"

"Yes, purple elephant." The two adults looked at each other once again, both completely oblivious as to what Austin was trying to say until after a few moments Pat had an idea.

"Does Mabel need her purple elephant to sleep?"

Austin nodded and a look of relief made its way onto Mitch's face, "Do you know where purple elephant is mate?" he asked Austin.

"No." Austin responded though by now he was completely distracted by the toy dinosaurs and setting them up in their positions for the picnic he was preparing, "Can we play dinosaurs now?" he asked Pat.

"Yeah, we'll play in just a minute. You keep setting the picnic up, I just have to help uncle Mitch with something." Austin smiled and happily went about playing while Pat stood up and he and Mitch made their way to the opposite side of the room, talking quietly.

"Do you know what this thing looks like?" Pat asked.

"I'm presuming it looks like an elephant and it's purple. I think mum and dad might have given it to her when she was born." Mitch replied. "But we need to find it, and quickly, because if I have to listen to that crying for one more minute-"

"Okay, you take this side of the room and i'll take the other."

Pat walked back to the other side of the room and the two started searching for the toy. They lifted up pillows and couch cushions and even the couch, looked in all the kitchen cabinets and every hollowed out space a toy could find its way into, but to no avail.

"It's nowhere!" Mitch said with clear frustration.

"Maybe we could just buy a new one?" Pat suggested.

"Oh yeah, let me just call mum and dad and get them to ship one over in the next half hour!"

"Okay. Maybe it's in Bec and Shaun's room."

Mitch and Pat went into the room where a crying Mabel was lying in the cot. They searched through the entire space and just when it seemed they were destined to have to listen to a screaming infant for the rest of the afternoon, Pat spoke from where he was half under the bed,

"I've got it!"

"Really!?" Mitch shouted with excitement as Pat wriggled free and held the toy up in the air before throwing it to Mitch who took it over to the cot and held it above the child. Five minutes later the crying had stopped and Mitch and Pat gently shut the door behind them as they left the room and went back to where Austin was still playing with his dinosaurs.

"Can we play now?" Austin asked whilst looking up at Pat with a pleading expression and Mitch looked at the clock on the wall before frowning.

"It's your nap time buddy."

"No! I'm not tired! And you promised we would play after you helped uncle Mitch!" Austin yelled, directing the last part to Pat.

"Austin, you can play with your dinosaurs after you have a sleep." Mitch spoke calmly.

"No! I want to play now!"

"Austin-"

"No!"

Mitch looked at Pat with a pleading expression.

"You know Austin," Pat began to speak moving to sit down next to the pouting child, "Sam and Leo told me that they're very tired and that they wouldn't be able to enjoy the picnic because they'd just fall asleep."

"No they didn't! You just don't want to play!"

"They did, so how about you take Sam and Leo with you to have a sleep and then when you wake up all of you can enjoy the picnic."

"Will you come and tuck me in?"

"Yeah, come on grab Sam and Leo."

Austin picked up the two toy dinosaurs and stood up grabbing hold of Pat's outstretched hand, the two made their way in the direction of Austin's bedroom and Pat smiled at Mitch on his way past receiving a thankful smile in return. Once Pat had taken Austin to his room, Mitch made his way to the sofa in the room in front of which Austin had set up his dinosaur picnic. Being careful not to disturb the set up Mitch sat down on the sofa and pulled his phone out of his pocket. Ten minutes late Pat emerged from the room and softly closed the door behind him before walking over to the sofa on which Mitch was sitting and taking his place next to him.

"Kids are exhausting. I think that I may need a nap after that, honestly I don't know how I'm going to stay awake for the team meeting in a couple of hours." Pat said.

"Yeah." Mitch said with his eyes still focused on his phone.

"Has Bec called yet?"

"No, not yet." Mitch said turning off his phone and Pat noticed an anxious tone in his voice.

"Shaun's going to be fine, he's a trooper, give him two weeks and he'll probably be trying to bat again." Pat said in an attempt to reassure his obviously worried boyfriend.

"I know he will, I just can't help but worry about him, he's my brother."

"I know." Pat pulled Mitch in so he was resting on his shoulder.

"If you're that tired why don't you go back to your room and try and get some sleep before the meeting."

"It's fine, I'll just text Mitch Starc and ask him to pick me up a coffee before he gets there."

"You'll just be even more tired after the meeting then."

"It'll be fine, besides I can't leave you here alone with the kids when you're all stressed and worried about Shaun, what sort of a boyfriend would that make me?"

"The kids are sleeping and i'm sure Bec will call soon. Besides, the only kind of boyfriend you'll be if you don't go and get some sleep is one that's being yelled at by a bunch of coaches and teammates because you fell asleep mid meeting."

"Are you sure? I really don't mind staying."

"Seriously Pat, go and get some sleep, you need it."

"Okay, well can we see each other later then, after the meeting?"

"Yeah, I'd like that."

"Okay good. I love you." 

Pat spoke as Mitch moved off his shoulder and allowed him to stand up. Walking towards the door Mitch followed him and planted a soft kiss on his lips before opening the door and allowing Pat to exit.

"I love you too."

Pat smiled and the door closed behind him leaving Mitch in the room alone. The minute he was alone however Mitch felt the panic rise in his chest and all the anxiety that he had managed to push aside for the past two hours was coming back in droves. As he tried to focus on his breathing his mind raced with thoughts, Shaun would be fine, it was only simple surgery after all, but then again sometimes it was the most simple surgeries that resulted in death. He shook his head, Shaun wouldn't die, he was a fit and healthy man, he tried, he desperately tried to get the thoughts out of his mind, but whatever Mitch did, they kept coming back stronger and stronger, until he finally decided he had had enough.

He walked over to the kitchenette in the room and went straight for the cupboard he had been looking for the purple elephant in earlier. Opening it he pulled out the almost full loaf of multigrain bread and quickly walked back to the sofa, clutching the food to his chest with both arms. He sat down, and he opened the bag and brought the bread to his mouth slice by slice until all that was left was the crumbs. As he was walking to the bathroom and even as he was bringing the food he had just consumed back up his throat, Mitch wasn't thinking about all the things that could be going wrong with Shaun, he wasn't really thinking about anything, and for even the slightest of moments he felt completely free of the anxiety which had been plaguing him.

A little while later Mitch was flushing the toilet and washing his hands before splashing water on his face and proceeding to open the bathroom door, when he did he was greeted by a rather concerned looking Austin, neck slightly straining as he looked up at Mitch who was standing in the doorway.

"Austin, buddy, I thought you were sleeping."

"Pat forgot my sippy cup."

"Oh, okay, come on let's get it then." Mitch said as he extended a hand for Austin to hold on to as the walked out to the kitchenette.

"Are you sick uncle Mitch?" Austin asked and Mitch felt all the panic, anxiety and guilt he had been rid of for the past ten minutes come back.

"No mate i'm fine."

"But you were being sick, I heard you."

"Yeah. I was." Mitch said realising he couldn't tell the child he was wrong, "I just have a bit of a funny tummy at the moment."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah i'm okay." Mitch said as he filled the sippy cup up with water and screwed the lid on.

"You should tell mummy. When I get sick she makes me feel better, she has special medicine."

"It's okay, I don't need to tell mummy, and you don't either yeah, I'll be okay in a little bit. Now, shall we get you back to bed?"

Austin nodded and grabbed a hold of Mitch's hand before the two walked back to his bedroom. Five minutes later after the child was all tucked up back into bed and sleeping peacefully, Mitch walked back over to the sofa and sat down. After a few moments he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and pulled it out to answer not bothering to check the caller ID.

"Hello." Mitch spoke into the phone.

"Hey, it's me." Mitch recognised Bec's voice.

"Oh hey, how's everything going?"

"Yeah good, great, the surgery went really well, they're just bringing him back from recovery now."

"So no problems?"

"None whatsoever, the surgeon said it was really straightforward. They want to keep him in overnight though, just to make sure everything sets properly."

"Alright." Mitch coughed and felt his throat burn at the action.

"You alright?"

"Yeah fine, just a tickle."

"Okay good, well I might stay here for a couple of hours and just make sure he's all good for the night, but then I'll be straight there."

"Take as much time as you need, the kids are fine, they're both sleeping."

"I hope they weren't too much trouble to get down, I forgot to warn you that Mabel has quite the attachment to her purple elephant and Austin needs his sippy cup for his naps."

"All things we figured out, it's all good Bec, just tell Shaun I love him yeah?"

"Yeah I will. See you in a couple of hours."

"Bye."

Mitch hung up the phone and placed it on the coffee table to the side of the sofa, he leaned his head back and sighed, of course Shaun was fine, it was a simple operation, the likelihood of anything going wrong was extremely slim. Mitch could feel the guilt swirl around in his stomach and reached for the remote in order to turn on the TV, the background noise would surely help everything stop in his head. The opening credits to some soap opera filled the screen and Mitch settled in to watch.

***

Mitch was starting to notice that the state of British television at five in the afternoon wasn't really that good. He was on to his third soap opera in the two hours since he had turned it on and this one had the exact same plot line as the one before, only with different characters. Just as he was starting to seriously debate whether or not it was worth changing the channel a faint beep signalled that someone was unlocking the door and he sat up a little straighter. When the door opened he saw Bec walking in with a smile,

"Hey." She said as she closed the door behind her.

"Hey. How's Shaun?" Mitch responded.

"He's good, keeps pestering the nurses about going home."

"That doesn't surprise me."

"Me neither. How were the kids?"

"They were good, a few problems getting them to sleep but nothing major."

"Good, where's Pat? I thought he would be here with you still."

"He was pretty worn out after we got the kids to sleep so I told him he should go and get a couple of hours sleep before the team meeting, he's probably there now actually."

"Okay." Bec said as she moved over and sat next to Mitch on the sofa, "So is there anything decent on?" She gestured to the TV.

"Not really, a bunch of soap operas."

"The one we like?"

"No, it doesn't come on till tonight."

"Bugger, oh well, this will have to do."

The two sat watching the TV for the next twenty minutes, it was during a rather intriguing scene that Bec turned to Mitch and proceeded to speak.

"Is it just me, or is this not at all believable?"

"What part are you referring to?"

"Okay so you're telling me that five years ago he was brutally murdered by some serial killer and everyone had accepted it, and now he's back from the dead when in fact he was never really dead, no, apparently he was kidnapped by some woman as an act of revenge, she brainwashed him into believing he was her dead son and now he's back and can't remember a single person from before he was kidnapped."

"No, it's not really that believable, but it's a soap opera."

"Okay point taken, but if an actor wants to come back to a show but they were killed off, I think the directors can come up with a better re-introduction than that."

"They were probably just trying to be different."

"Well their idea of different is just plain stupid." Bec stood up from her position and started walking over to the kitchenette turning back to Mitch when she got there, "Did you want hot chocolate?"

"Yeah, thanks."

Soon after, Bec was walking back to the sofa with two mugs in her hand and a bag scrunched up under her arm. Giving one mug to Mitch she sat down placing her mug on the table and opened the bag which was now in both her hands.

"Marshmallow?" She offered the bag to Mitch.

"Nah thanks."

"You love marshmallows."

"Yeah I do-" Mitch paused for a moment to think, "I just have a sore throat." It wasn't really a lie.

"You're not getting sick are you?"

"No i'm good."

"Okay then." The credits had started rolling on the TV and soon a new soap opera was starting, "We can only hope that this one is at least a little believable."

Mitch smiled and brought his mug to his mouth to take a sip, he felt a prominent burning sensation as the hot liquid made its way down his already burning throat but nevertheless continued to smile. He and Bec stayed seated on the sofa for the next hour and a bit with the latter only moving and going to her room once Mabel started to cry, after she had settled the child and brought her out to the living room Austin woke up and Bec went about setting him up with a movie on the iPad in his room. As she was in Austin's room Mitch heard his phone buzz and swiftly picked it up to see a message from Pat.

_[Pat]: So the team meeting has somehow turned into a team dinner at a restaurant down the street._

_[Mitch]: Really?_

_[Pat]: Yeah. I don't know how long we're gonna be though so we might not get to see each other again tonight like we'd planned._

_[Mitch]: It's all good, the team is important. You just stay and have fun, we can hang out sometime tomorrow._

_[Pat]: Are you sure? I can just make an excuse and leave. I'd much rather be with you anyway._

_[Mitch]: Don't do that, i'm okay, Bec and I are watching shitty soap operas._

_[Pat]: Sounds fun. Are you 100% certain you don't mind?_

_[Mitch]: 200%._

_[Pat]: Okay, i'll text you when we're done, maybe we could still see each other tonight._

_[Mitch]: Yeah. I love you._

_[Pat]: Not as much as I love you. Have fun with Bec._

Mitch put his phone down and sighed. He knew that Pat being in the team when he wasn't meant that they would have to spend time apart, like when the team all went out for dinner, he didn't know if he was bothered by it or not because he wanted Pat to be a part of the team and get along with his teammates, but he also wanted to spend time with Pat as selfish as that may seem. Just as he was starting to stew on his thoughts he heard the door to Austin's room closing and saw Bec walking out with a smile.

"What's up? You look a little deflated." She asked as she walked back over to Mitch.

"You don't mind if I stay here a little longer do you?" Mitch replied.

"Course not, why?"

"Pat's team meeting has turned into a team dinner down the street."

"Oh, you can stay as long as you like. It's a bit boring without Shaun here anyway."

"Thanks."

Mitch turned back to the television which was now playing yet another soap opera and allowed himself to get lost in the world of crappy plot lines and bad acting, anything to take his mind off how much he was realising he wanted to be with Pat.

***

Mitch was sitting on the end of his bed scrolling through Instagram trying to find something to distract him from the pit of anxiety and guilt his stomach had become. He had left Bec's room at about eight the previous night and as it usually happened, the minute he was alone and without a distraction he could feel the anxiety start to overwhelm him. The thing was, Instagram wasn't exactly a great distraction method, after all there are only so many memes you can laugh at before you realise they aren't actually that funny. The worry that had been building in him for the past however many hours was reaching its peak and as a result Mitch grabbed him room key from the bedside table and was just about to leave to go to the convenience store a couple of blocks away when there was a knock at the door. Placing his room key back where he picked it up from he walked over to the door and opened it.

"Pat, hey." Mitch said albeit a little flustered.

"Hey." Pat replied as he leaned in to kiss Mitch on the lips before moving his way into the room.

"How was the team dinner?"

"Yeah good actually, I had fun."

"That's good."

"Did you have a good night with Bec?"

"Yeah it was good, we mostly just watched TV."

"Anything good?"

"Not really. Didn't you have training?"

"It's not for a few hours so I thought we could hang out now since we didn't get to last night."

"I'd like that. Did you have anything in mind?"

"I did actually." Pat had a suggestive look on his face.

"Do you want to tell me what this activity is?"

Pat smiled as he reached into his pocket and along with his phone and wallet pulled out a packet of playing cards, "We're playing snap."

"Snap?"

"Yes snap."

"Where did you get this idea from?"

"Do you not want to?"

"Oh no, I do, I mean hello, Marsh family champion 2008 right here."

"Are you really?"

"Shaun would argue with the fact, but yes, yes I am." Mitch said proudly as he took the cards from Pat's grasp and walked over to the small table in the room to set up. Five minutes later he and Pat were sitting opposite one another both intently focused on the game.

"So how does one become a snap champion in the Marsh family?" Pat asked curiously.

"We did it on a round by round basis so we all started off playing and then we would play one round until a person got out. Then the remaining four would play another round until another one got out and this would continue until there were only two of us left. Then the two would play and the winner would take all." Mitch answered.

"That actually sounds like a decent system."

"It was."

"So why would Shaun argue you were champion?"

"He thought that because I was the youngest mum and dad were deliberately ignoring snaps so I could win. To this day he still claims that I didn't win and mum and dad won't admit whether or not they did anything. He was more a sore loser than anything else."

"I would have loved to be there for some of those matches."

"I really don't know that you would have, it got pretty cut throat."

"How cut throat can a game of snap actually get?"

"One year Mel covered her hands in deep heat so that if any of us tried to snap with her at the same time we would have to pull away and she would win."

"Wouldn't that burn her hands?"

"This is the point where I mention that game night came to a premature end when mum had to take her to the hospital because her hands got all blistered. She hasn't actually used the stuff since that night."

"I don't blame her. But that's the worst thing that happened right?"

"Not by a long shot. The kids betting circle was pretty brutal, I lost two hundred dollars and three signed posters, but mum and dad shut that one down pretty quick once they found out about it."

"This all sounds very aggressive for a family card game."

"It's just how it went. Tell you what, we'll have a game night with Shaun and Bec and then you can see just how intense things can get."

"Okay. The thought scares me slightly, but okay."

Pat placed down a card on the pile and before his eyes even had time to read what was on it Mitch's hand was slamming down on the table and he was yelling,

"Snap!"

"That was quick, how did you even read what was on the card?"

"Another trait of the Marsh family snap tournaments, it's the quick or the dead."

"Right."

Pat and Mitch continued to play for the next half hour with Mitch winning the majority of the games and Pat sneaking the odd one here or there. Mitch was shuffling the cards and about to deal them out when Pat spoke again.

"I almost forgot to ask, how's Shaun."

"He's good, Bec went to pick him up a little while ago, they'll probably be back pretty soon."

"So the surgery went well?"

"Yeah, really well apparently."

"That's good. I still feel awful about what happened."

"You shouldn't, it was just one of those freak accidents that happen, and Shaun forgave you."

"Do you? Forgive me?"

"Why would I need to forgive you?"

"I saw how worried you were Mitch, and I was the reason."

"Not really."

"You know what I mean, Shaun was having surgery because of me, and you were worried because Shaun was having surgery."

"Yeah I was worried, but I never blamed you, what happened wasn't your fault, you couldn't have controlled the ball once it left your hand."

"I know that."

"Good. So stop thinking this whole situation is all your fault and prepare yourself for another onslaught."

Mitch gestured to the dealt out cards and smiled at Pat who smiled back. Picking up his pile of cards and starting the game Mitch was thinking to himself, being with Pat and having fun was a much better distraction than hopelessly scrolling through his Instagram feed. Deep in the back of his mind however, his thoughts were still fixated on the gnawing anxiety and guilt in the pit of his stomach.


	10. Celebrations

The sound of knocking filled Mitch's hotel room and he made his way over to the door to answer it. "Bec?" He said as the door opened to reveal the smiling figure.

"You sound surprised to see me. You're still in your pyjamas?" Bec spoke as she gestured to the flannel red chequered pyjama pants and grey t shirt Mitch was wearing.

"I am surprised to see you, and it's like seven in the morning of course I'm still in my pyjamas, I only just got out of bed."

"You seem oddly awake and alert for someone who's only just gotten up."

"Well I've been awake for a little bit, what are you doing here this early anyway?"

"I came to get you for breakfast."

"Breakfast?"

"The family breakfast we were having this morning, I texted you about it last night."

"Did you?" Mitch walked back into his room, "Come on in." He called to Bec who shut the door softly before walking into the room herself and standing back while Mitch picked up his phone from the bedside table and opened his messages tapping on Bec's name when he found it.

_Hey, so we're having a family breakfast for Shaun's birthday tomorrow and you and Pat are coming. I'll come to your room around seven that way we can be there around seven thirty._

Mitch turned his phone off and placed it back on the bedside table before turning to Bec and smiling, "Sorry. I mustn't have heard it go off and then didn't bother to check it before I went to bed. I thought we were doing lunch for Shaun's birthday."

"We were, but then I figured that since Pat's practically a member of the family he should be there and they have training at lunch."

"Right then, well I guess - don't!" Mitch spoke loudly and suddenly as he saw Bec about to sit down on his bed.

"What?" Bec responded, obviously confused by the outburst.

"Don't sit on my bed, please." Mitch said in a calmer tone.

"Why not?"

"It's made the way I like it and if you sit on it I'm just going to have to make it again."

"Okay then, sorry."

"No, it's alright." Mitch said as he walked over to where the wardrobe was situated in the room and opened the wooden doors to start going through his clothes. He pulled out a black and white striped shirt and a pair of jeans and placed them on the end of the bed before looking back to Bec who spoke,

"So if you were unaware of this breakfast I'm going to guess that Pat knows absolutely nothing about it."

"You would be correct. I'll text him and see if he can come."

"Cool." Bec smiled as she walked over to the small table in the room and pulled out one of the chairs before sitting in it and leaning back. Mitch went to pick up his phone once again, this time opening the string of messages between him and Pat and typing a new one.

_[Mitch]: Good morning._

_[Pat]: Morning._

_[Mitch]: Did you have any plans before training?_

_[Pat]: No._

_[Mitch]: Okay, good. Bec is having a family breakfast for Shaun's birthday and wants us to be there._

_[Pat]: Yeah cool, when?_

_[Mitch]: Now._

_[Pat]: Now?!_

_[Mitch]: Yeah._

_[Pat]: Did you know about this?_

_[Mitch]: Not exactly. She texted me about it last night but I didn't check my messages before I went to bed._

_[Pat]: Right then._

_[Mitch]: So are you free? Can you come?_

_[Pat]: Yeah, you'll have to give me time to get ready though, I'm still in my pyjamas._

_[Mitch]: All good. Just meet us in the lobby when you're ready._

_[Pat]: Okay see you then._

Mitch smiled and turned his phone off before putting it back on the bedside table and turning to Bec.

"Pat's all good to come."

"Excellent!"

"He's gonna meet us in the lobby so did you guys wanna go down there now and I'll meet you there when I'm done?"

"Sounds like a plan."

Bec smiled as she stood up from the chair she had been sitting in and walked over to the door and left. After she had, Mitch closed the door and sighed loudly before walking to the bed and pulling back the doona to reveal twelve empty muesli bar wrappers. He picked them up and put them in the bin before walking to the bathroom, the clothes he had picked still in their positions on the end of the bed as he closed the door behind him.

Half an hour later the lift doors were opening to reveal the ground floor and lobby of the hotel and Mitch was making his way across the tiled floor to where he saw Bec, Shaun, Pat and the kids standing around one of the many sofas in the room. As he got closer he could see a look on Shaun's face that he didn't really know how to describe but the words that came out of his brothers mouth when Mitch came to a stop helped somewhat.

"I know you've always had shocking issues with time management Mitch but it doesn't take half an hour to get dressed to go to breakfast."

"Yeah well I had a shower."

"It's fine, you're here now so we can get going." Bec said with a smile as she started walking out the door and onto the path. The rest of the family followed with Pat walking beside Mitch, they walked in silence for a moment before Pat spoke.

"I thought you said that you guys were doing lunch for Shaun's birthday."

"We were, but then Bec thought that you should be there so then she had to change it to breakfast otherwise it would clash with training."

"Really? She changed the plan just so I could come?"

"Yeah."

"That's really nice."

Mitch just smiled in response and allowed Pat to ramble on about the intricacies of what makes a good blanket and how the one he currently has to sleep with is much worse than the one on Mitch's bed at home. His throat was burning and his stomach hurting, and all Mitch could think about was the fact that he was about to spend an hour with his family making up some excuse about why he couldn't eat his breakfast, because he knew that if he started he wasn't going to stop.

After a couple more streets of walking they were walking through the doors of a cafe and sitting down at a table near the window. After reading the menu and ordering, the adults had settled into comfortable conversation while Mabel was sleeping and Austin was watching a movie on Shaun's phone.

"Surely that didn't actually happen?" Pat said with surprise.

"No, no, no, it did, it was like the funniest moment of the year." Bec said only just containing her laughter.

"It wasn't that funny." Shaun said.

"It was, it was. Mitch, tell your boyfriend how funny the pancake batter incident was."

"I can't really remember it." Mitch said in a voice that indicated he was a million miles away.

"How can you not remember? It was so funny, Shaun was trying to make pancakes and then tripped over Austin's firetruck and ended up with batter all over him!" Bec was now nearly in complete hysterics.

"Hilarious." Shaun deadpanned.

Bec was starting to calm down from her outburst of laughter when the waitress came over with everyone's food. Five minutes later everyone was eating their breakfast in reasonable silence, well, everyone but Mitch, who had taken one half hearted bite for show and had then taken to pushing the scrambled eggs around his plate with his fork.

"You right Mitch?" Shaun asked.

"Yeah all good, why?" Mitch responded looking up from his plate and at his brother.

"You've barely taken one bite of your food."

"It just- tastes a bit funny."

"Did you want some of mine?" Pat asked as he offered a piece of toast with avocado on it.

"No thanks, my throat's a bit sore anyway, just feels like I'm swallowing razors."

"Still? Maybe you should go and see a doctor, you might have tonsillitis or something." Bec intervened.

"Still? How long has it been sore for?" Pat asked with concern.

"A couple of days, a week." Mitch responded.

"Then maybe you should see a doctor."

"I'm good, I'll just call into the chemist and pick up some lozenges on the way back to the hotel."

"I'll come with you."

"You have training."

"Which isn't for another few hours."

"Okay."

After another half hour everyone had finished eating and Bec, Shaun and the kids had started to walk back to the hotel while Pat and Mitch had made a detour to the chemist. The two of them were walking through the store with Mitch explaining the pancake batter incident in more detail to Pat.

"So to cut a long story short Shaun was completely and utterly- Pat?" Mitch trailed off as he turned around from picking a box of lozenges off the shelf and noticed Pat was no longer beside him. "Pat?" Mitch continued to call out walking through the store until he saw Pat walking towards him with a small box in his hand, the contents of which Mitch was unable to decipher until he was right in front of him.

"Condoms?" Mitch asked.

"We're out." Pat responded without any hesitation.

"How are we out? Last time I looked there was still half a packet."

"There was. That was until I caught Mitch Starc rummaging through my bedside drawers last night when he claimed he was only in my room to drop off my jumper- which wasn't actually my jumper. Anyway, after he left I was curious so I went looking in the drawers and the packet was gone."

"So if he took them why isn't he buying you new ones?"

"Oh, I intend to make him pay."

"Like with revenge?"

"No, like with money. You got what you need?"

"Yeah." Mitch held up the box of honey flavoured lozenges and Pat smiled.

"Good. Let's pay then."

***

Mitch was half lying across the bed in Bec and Shaun's room entertaining Mabel who was lying on her back next to him while Bec was pulling clothes out of the wardrobe and putting them back in just as quickly. Shaun had taken Austin with him to the training session leaving only the three of them in the room.

"Nothing. Nothing. I have nothing to wear!" Bec said exasperatedly.

"The six dresses you've pulled out of the wardrobe in the last ten minutes would beg to differ." Mitch said as he smiled down at Mabel and tickled her stomach.

"Let me put it this way, I have nothing to wear that's right for the occasion."

"You'll have to find something then won't you."

"There is another option."

"And what would that be?"

"We could go shopping."

"We?"

"Please Mitch, we haven't had a day out since we got here, I miss us hanging out outside a hotel room. We can go for coffee after."

"You have become quite the expert in convincing haven't you?" Bec nodded with a smile, "Okay fine. I guess looking around could be kind of fun."

"Great!"

Bec smiled as she shut the wardrobe and picked Mabel up from where she had been lying next to Mitch who himself stood up and stretched. A taxi ride and a short walk later the three of them were roaming the Birmingham Shopping Centre looking through the shopfronts until they were walking through the entrance of a clothing store and browsing the racks.

"You haven't actually told me what occasion we're shopping for." Mitch said holding a pile of clothes Bec had picked out.

"Shaun and I are going out to dinner tonight for his birthday." Bec replied as she placed another dress on the pile in Mitch's arms.

"How romantic. So will you be needing my supreme babysitting skills?"

"We will not. Pete and Sarah Handscomb have offered their services as a present to Shaun."

"Oh. How nice of them." Mitch suddenly sounded deflated.

"Yeah, I thought it was. Anyway I think we have enough now so let's go try these things on."

Bec started walking in the direction of the fitting rooms and Mitch followed still holding the pile of clothes she had selected and soon he was sitting on the chair outside the cubicle Bec was in with Mabel on his lap. Twenty minutes and seven dresses later Bec was walking out to where Mitch was sitting in a long sleeved above the knee lilac lace dress.

"I think this is the one." She said with a rather large smile.

"Yeah it's nice."

"Do you not like it?"

"No I do, Shaun will love it."

Bec smiled as she walked back into the cubicle and changed back into the clothes she had on before and emerged a short time later to pay for the dress. Once they left the store she and Mitch were once again walking in front of the shops and in the direction of the food court.

"Did you want to have coffee now?" Bec asked.

"Sounds good." Mitch responded without much emotion and Bec noticed. 

Pretty soon the three of them were seated at a table in a cafe with coffee's in front of them, Mitch was playing with the spoon they had given him and dragging it along the table aimlessly. Bec was placing her mug back on the table after taking a sip when she spoke,

"What's up? You've been all sad and mopey for the past twenty minutes, since I told you about dinner."

"It's nothing, I'm good."

"Clearly. Come on, tell me what's going on."

"I just thought that I was your first choice babysitter, I mean I love looking after the kids they are my niece and nephew after all, and I think they like me looking after them."

"They do, they love you, and usually yeah you are my first point of call when it comes to babysitting, but Pete and Sarah offered, it's not like we could say thanks but no thanks."

"I guess not."

"Why don't you spend the night with Pat instead?"

"We were already going to."

"Okay, why don't you and Pat go out tonight."

"Because he has a semi final to play in two days and he's probably tired from training."

"I'm sure you can find something to do that doesn't require large amounts of energy."

"I know."

"So why don't you?"

"I like staying in and cuddling on the bed, and so does Pat, we don't need to go out."

"Don't you want to do a proper date night?"

"Well yeah but-"

"Then go out tonight, find something that you both feel like doing and do it."

"It's that simple is it?"

"Yep."

"Do you know how hard it is to argue with you sometimes?"

"I have an idea."

Mitch laughed and Bec did the same, "Okay, I'll ask Pat if he wants to go out tonight."

"Good. Now, will you be needing a new outfit for this occasion?"

"I should be fine, I'll just wear those jeans we spent forever picking back home and I'm sure I can find a shirt to go with them."

"Which one were you thinking?"

"I don't know, that beigy chequered one."

"You mean the one that you wore to Austin's birthday party?" Bec questioned with a hint of concern in her voice.

"Yes, why, what's wrong with it?"

"It should be burned. Come on, I'll help you pick out a new one."

Bec finished off the last of her coffee and stood up, after securing Mabel to her chest she picked up her bags and stood behind the chair she had been sitting in waiting for Mitch to finish. He quickly drank the remainder of his drink and stood up before walking around so he was next to Bec and the three of them then proceeded to leave the cafe and walk through the shopping centre in the direction of the men's clothing stores.

***

A couple of hours after training had finished Pat and Mitch were walking through the halls of their hotel floor on their way to see a movie when they rather fortuitously ran into Mitch Starc and Josh. Pat had a sheer look of determination on his face when he spoke in the direction of Mitch Starc.

"You owe me thirteen dollars and ten cents."

"No I don't, you said that coffee yesterday arvo was your shout."

"Yeah I said I would shout you a coffee, not coffee and a toasted sandwich. But that isn't what I was talking about."

"What then?"

"I'm referring to the packet of condoms I had to buy to replace the ones you stole last night."

"Right. Those."

"You said you were going to the chemist!" Josh suddenly spoke with slight horror.

"And have to deal with the awkward situation when I had to pay for them? No thanks."

"But it's different when I had to do it?" Pat asked.

"That's not what I was saying. How about the next time I'm in a supermarket with a self serve checkout I'll buy you a replacement packet."

"I don't need a replacement packet because I already bought a replacement packet. What I want is for you to give me the money I had to spend to buy that replacement packet."

"Okay look I'm a fair person, so how about I give you six dollars and we call it even."

"They were thirteen."

"Yes, but I only stole half a packet so really it's fair for me to only pay half."

"Oh for god sakes." Josh said with frustration as he reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet, "You're such a tight ass."

Mitch leaned in closer to Pat and spoke quietly, "I think that might be what got us into this situation in the first place." Pat struggled to stifle the laugh that came in response.

"Here Pat." Josh handed him a twenty dollar euro note, "That should cover the condoms and the toasted sandwich."

"Thanks Josh." Pat smiled kindly before he turned to face Mitch Starc and that smile turned smug, "Now we can get the jumbo drinks. Come on Mitch, we'll be late for the movie." Pat reached for his boyfriends hand and the two started walking off, as they were they heard Josh say something as he and Mitch walked off in the other direction.

"I cannot believe that you stole condoms."

"It was purely for convenience, they were there, I knew they were there, we needed them."

"Well they're going to go to waste aren't they, we can't use the rest them."

"Why not?"

"I'm not explaining that to you, if you want to have sex then you're going to have to go to the chemist for real."

Pat and Mitch laughed softly as they continued walking towards the lifts and the exit of the hotel. The two of them were walking on the footpath through the streets of Birmingham and in the direction of the cinema in reasonable silence for the first couple of minutes until Mitch broke it by speaking,

"You haven't told me how training went."

"No."

"So? How did it go?"

"It was alright." Pat stopped in his tracks after he said this and put his hand on Mitch's upper arm encouraging him to stop as well, "Let's make a deal, tonight we don't talk about anything to do with cricket, we forget about it all and have the best date night ever."

"Sounds like a plan."

Mitch smiled and Pat did the same as they started walking again. About ten minutes later they were getting closer to their destination when Pat spoke,

"Is that a new shirt? I haven't seen it before." He gestured to the short sleeved maroon button up shirt Mitch was wearing.

"It is, Bec helped me pick it out, claimed the one I was going to wear needed to be burned. Do you like it?"

"I love it, it suits you."

"Thanks. I like your shirt as well." Mitch said in reference to the short sleeved black button up shirt with small white dots.

"I've had this shirt for ages, I wear it all the time."

"I know, and each time you do it looks better."

As Mitch finished speaking they had arrived outside the cinema and pretty soon he and Pat were inside purchasing their tickets and snacks and making their way to their seats inside the room. Once they had been seated for a couple of minutes and the cinema was gradually filling up Pat opened a bag and took a handful out of it before offering it to Mitch,

"Jaffa?"

"No thanks."

"Is your throat still hurting? Have the lozenges not worked?"

"They have a bit, it's much better than it was, I just don't think swallowing any more than I have to is a great idea, I'm fine with my lemonade."

"Okay, I guess we're going to have jaffa's to take back to the hotel."

"Oh please, you'll have demolished that packet halfway into the movie." Mitch said with a laugh.

"Maybe."

"Definitely, it's just like how you say we can share the popcorn when we're back home, but somehow you always end up eating about three quarters of the bucket." 

"I have no clue what you're talking about." Pat said innocently.

"Right." Mitch said as he looked around the room to see seats filling up but the screen at the front was still blank, "When is this movie supposed to start?"

"Well it said six thirty and it is currently-" Pat looked at his watch, "Six fifteen."

"Why do they even let people in this early, like what are we supposed to do for the next fifteen minutes while we wait?"

"Have a conversation."

"Okay, what do you want to converse about?"

"My brother once got kicked out of a movie back in Sydney."

"Which one? Wait was is Tim? Did he get kicked out for protesting?" Mitch said with a slight laugh.

"That happened one time and it had nothing to do with movies, it was about animal rights."

"He still nearly got arrested. So it wasn't Tim?"

"No it was."

"What did he do?"

"You know how the lights go out and you can't really see what's happening?" Mitch nodded, "Well he was there with his girlfriend who thought it would be a good idea to try and jerk him off once the movie started." Mitch started laughing, "Anyway the theatre guy was walking around and caught them, kicked them out, banned them for six months."

"Six months seems a bit steep."

"There were kids in the room."

"Oh."

"Yeah, they didn't last long after that, a month later they had broken up."

"Because of the movie thing?"

"No I think she cheated on him."

"Right then."

Pat smiled as he reached into the bag of jaffas, pulling out a handful he out them in his mouth before looking up at the screen to see it was still blank. He turned back to Mitch to see he was sipping at his drink through his straw, he laughed softly before speaking,

"You get up me for eating most of the food but you're just as bad when it comes to drinks, how much of that have to actually consumed so far?"

"About half. But what else would you expect when we have to wait this long to see a movie."

"Well don't think that you're going to be able to steal any of mine when you run out."

"It's cute that you think that."

"Oh I know you won't be stealing any, I got lemon lime and bitters."

"You what?!"

"Shh, the movie's starting." Pat said with a rather smug smile as the lights dimmed and he turned to the front of the theatre to see the advertisements coming on the large screen. Just as the sound was radiating around the room Pat felt another hand clasp his and smiled.


	11. The Calm And The Storm

Mitch was in his hotel room lying on his bed watching the soap opera that was currently on the television in front of him. It had been a reasonably uneventful day, he and Bec had met for tea in the morning but apart from that the day had mainly consisted of him lazing around the hotel while the team trained and Bec and Shaun went on an afternoon family outing. The soap opera that had attained his attention for the past twenty minutes was becoming quite boring and repetitive leading Mitch to look at the clock on the wall and discover it was quarter to six. Thinking to himself that it wouldn't be completely unreasonable to get changed into his pyjamas now and settle in for a solid few hours of television watching, Mitch was startled by the sound of his phone going off on the bedside table beside him. Leaning over he reached for the phone and turned on the screen to see a message, he quickly unlocked the device to read it and reply.

_[Pat]: Hey. Can you come to my room?_

_[Mitch]: Why? Is something wrong?_

_[Pat]: No. I just want you here._

_[Mitch]: You sure that's a good idea? It's gonna be a big day tomorrow, wouldn't want to distract you._

_[Pat]: I'm sure. I need you here._

_[Mitch]: Okay. I'll be there in five minutes._

Mitch turned off his phone and worked his way off the bed, once he was standing beside it he put his phone in the pocket of his pants and turned the television off so the room was silent. Picking up his room key from the chest near the door he turned off the lights so the room was completely dark and made his way out to the hallway, closing the door behind him. As he started walking in the direction of the lifts to go to Pat's room on the floor above him he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and pulled it out unlocking it and looking at the screen when it was in his hand.

_[Shaun]: We're having dinner at that restaurant a couple of streets away. Did you want to come?_

_[Mitch]: I can't. I'm on my way to see Pat._

_[Shaun]: I thought that you two weren't seeing each other tonight, because of tomorrow._

_[Mitch]: We weren't going to. But he just texted me a couple of minutes ago and asked if I could come to his room._

_[Shaun]: Okay well have fun, but just remember how important tomorrow is, no sex.  
_

Mitch sighed and shook his head as he turned his phone off and put it back in his pocket, that was Shaun, always managing to put the team first even when he wasn't technically in it. He continued his walk through the halls of his floor of the hotel and noticed just how vibrant some of the paintings on the walls were. A couple of minutes later he was on the eighteenth floor of the hotel and navigating his way to Pat's room, when he arrived outside room 456 he knocked on the door softly and only had to wait a couple of moments for an answer. Mitch noticed that Pat looked tired, probably a result of the intense training the team had been doing for the past two days to get themselves ready, he smiled as Pat did the same and moved aside to allow his boyfriend to enter the room. Once he was inside Mitch saw that the bed was already unmade and ready to sleep in and the television was providing substantial background noise.

"How has your day been?" Pat asked as Mitch turned to face him.

"Alright, how was yours?" Mitch asked in response.

"Pretty crappy, training was as tiring as ever and the team meeting which doubled as an extremely early dinner dragged on for ages."

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah fine."

"Okay. So what did you want to do tonight? Although I have to warn you that Shaun has given us strict instructions, we can't have sex." 

Mitch laughed at the words that came out of his mouth and expected Pat to do the same like he always did, but Pat didn't laugh as well, probably a pretty good indication of just how tired he was.

"Maybe we can just get under the blankets and watch whatever shit passes as reality television in this country?"

"I haven't heard a plan that good in a while."

Pat smiled as the two of them walked over to their sides of the bed and got under the blankets, he allowed himself to snuggle into Mitch's side and place his head on his boyfriend's chest. Mitch wrapped his arm around Pat's body and started to comfortingly move his hand up and down Pat's upper arm, his eyes looked ahead at the screen in front of them on the opposite side of the room and observed that Love Island UK was on. He looked down at Pat and saw that his eyes were fixated on the screen, smiling Mitch felt their breathing synchronise and looked back up at the screen, relaxing into the situation he thought about all the times he and Pat had ended up like this during a test series.

**Six and a half months ago**

Mitch extended his arm and knocked softly on the door he had ended up in front of after five minutes of navigating the floor of the hotel the team had been staying on for the past couple of days, he waited patiently for a response which eventually came in the form of a rather deflated looking Pat and Mitch understood why. It had been a long and frustrating two days, and even though he wasn't playing in this test Mitch understood what it felt like to be trying your absolute best and for nothing to be going your way.

"Hi." Mitch said in a soft tone.

"Hey." Pat replied in a tired voice.

"How are you doing?"

"Do you really need to ask?"

Mitch smiled sympathetically as Pat moved aside and allowed him to enter the room, once he was inside Mitch saw that Pat had moved a pillow and the doona off the bed onto the sofa which was opposite the television in the room. Pat moved into the room himself and walked immediately to the kitchenette where he filled a glass with water and quickly drank it before turning to Mitch.

"What's wrong with your bed?" Mitch gestured to the pillow and doona on the sofa.

"Nothing. I just felt like staying on the sofa for a bit and wanted to be comfortable." Pat responded as he started walking back across the room to where his boyfriend was standing.

"Okay, so were you planning to fall asleep? Because that can't be good for your back."

"I was just gonna watch some shitty reality shows to fill in the time."

"Want some company?"

"Depends, are you going to spend the whole time preaching about how tomorrow's another day and how if we believe anything could happen?"

"No. I was gonna sit down and let you lie all over me."

"Then I guess you can stay."

Mitch smiled as he moved to sit on one end of the sofa, once he was comfortably positioned Pat moved so that he was lying down and his head was resting on the pillow on Mitch's lap, soon after he pulled the doona up so it was covering him and he turned the television on to some channel showing reruns of The Bachelor. Half an hour passed and the two had stayed in their same positions the entire time with Mitch starting to run his fingers through Pat's hair soon after the television had come on. Pat shifted so that he was lying on his side and facing towards the television when he spoke quiet enough that Mitch had to strain to hear him over the sound coming from the television.

"Why are we so crap at everything?"

Mitch guessed he was talking about cricket, "You're not crap at everything, the team isn't crap at everything."

"We're down by over six hundred runs, and that was only their first innings."

"Okay yes we're not doing well, but the team is in a rebuilding phase."

"Rebuilding isn't an excuse to be playing as badly as we are."

"I know you don't want all the blind optimism, but it really will get better, not this test match, but soon."

"I know it will."

"And for tonight at least you can forget about it all and be with me."

Mitch smiled and looked down at Pat who had rolled back onto his back and was smiling as well, Mitch resumed running his fingers through his boyfriend's hair and focused his eyes on the television in front of them. After a couple of minutes he could feel Pat starting to relax beneath him, allowing both of them to focus on the now, not on the past two days or tomorrow, just on the fact that they were together.

**Present Day**

Three hours had passed and Mitch and Pat were still snuggled in the same position they got into when they first climbed into the bed. As the credits started rolling for the fifth episode they had watched Mitch looked down at Pat who was completely still and focused on the screen in front of him, Mitch leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of his head before speaking.

"I think it might be time for bed."

"Yeah, you're probably right."

"Can I borrow a pair of pyjamas? I don't really want to walk all the way back to my room and then have to come back."

"Of course you can."

Mitch smiled as he moved himself out of the embrace and walked over to the drawer he knew Pat was keeping his pyjamas in, picking out a pair he walked into the bathroom and had a quick shower before walking back to the bed and allowing Pat to do the same. Half an hour later the two of them were ready to climb back into bed, Mitch reached for the television remote on the bedside table and turned it off whilst Pat flicked the light switch to turn off the sconces above the bedside tables. The room was completely silent and dark when Pat and Mitch got into the bed and under the covers, moving so their heads were resting on the pillows and they were facing each other, Mitch reached for Pat's hand and brought it up so it was in line with his chest. The small space between them now filled by their entwined hands the two looked into each others eyes.

"How are you feeling about tomorrow?" Mitch asked in a voice just above a whisper.

"Honestly?" Pat replied just as quietly.

"Mmhm."

"I'm nervous. It's a semi final, all or nothing, if we lose then everything we've worked for these past six weeks is going to crumble into a heap."

"Maybe, but you've played so well for the entire tournament, even if you do lose you've got nothing to be unhappy about, and I'll be proud of you either way."

"I love you so much."

"I love you too."

Mitch leaned in and closed the gap as he kissed Pat softly on the lips, after a couple of moments he pulled back and rested his head on the pillow. He allowed his eyes to once again find Pat's and felt all the stress and worry evaporate into the air as the two of them stayed staring into each others eyes and clasping each others hand until they fell asleep.

***

Looking out over the balcony Mitch could see that the stands were pretty much full to capacity, mostly with England supporters but that was to be expected. The players were starting to walk onto the field and he could clearly depict who was who from where he, Bec and Josh were sitting in the front right corner of the room the players partners were watching from. Austin was off playing with some of the other kids while Mabel was happily sitting in a high chair next to Josh. 

"I didn't tell you what happened while we were at dinner last night did I?" Bec asked as she turned to Mitch who was sitting next to her on one side.

"No you didn't." Mitch responded.

"Well there was this waitress, she wouldn't have been any older than seventeen, anyway she was walking with like three plates stacked up her arm and someone had left their bag way out in the walkway and she tripped over it, ended up with salad all over herself in a packed restaurant and everybody was staring at her, someone even laughed."

"That would have been traumatising for the poor girl."

"It could have been worse, she could have dropped the food on a customer and then in an attempt to make things better also spill water all over them." Josh casually inserted himself into the conversation.

"I feel like there's a story that comes along with that statement." Mitch spoke.

"There is, but I was told that if I ever shared that story my life would become a living hell."

"Oh come on you have to tell us, cone of silence I promise." Bec said with enthusiasm.

"No can do sorry."

"Don't be boring, you've already told us half the story anyway you might as well finish it."

"Actually what I told you doesn't even cover a quarter. Oh look play's starting!" Josh said as he turned to face the front and look out at the field where Australia's opening batsmen were making their way to the crease.

"By the end of the day I will have found out the rest of that story Josh mark my words."

Josh stayed silent and continued looking out at the field as Mitch leaned in front of Bec and spoke to him, "If the rest of that story contains any intimate details I would be worried because she can be very persistent when she wants to know something." 

"How about we just focus on watching the match? You know, the reason we're here." Josh said as a slight blush crept onto his cheeks. Mitch and Bec both laughed softly as they turned to face the field where play had just gotten under way.

It wasn't even five minutes into the match when Australia lost their first wicket and had barely passed it when they lost their second. This wasn't the way any successful semi final campaign should have started and Mitch could feel the all to familiar feeling of angst and worry settle in the bottom of his stomach. Only a short time later the third wicket fell and the feeling was becoming more and more prominent, this wasn't the way things were supposed to go, Australia was supposed to win and then go on to the final and win that as well, not be three wickets down inside ten overs. Just as Mitch was starting to stew on his thoughts, the sound of a plastic bag opening came from beside him and he turned to see Bec who spoke,

"Would anyone like a marshmallow?" She said in a tone far to positive for the current situation.

"Why do you have a bag of marshmallows?" Josh asked as he took one from the bag.

"I like to come prepared." Bec offered the bag in Mitch's direction and he shook his head before she took the bag and placed it on the floor in the pile of stuff the three of them had brought. "Now Josh, care to share the rest of that story yet?"

"Not really no."

"I'm going to guess that it had something to do with Mitch, probably a date night went wrong."

"Mitch how do I make her stop?"

"I find that if you give her a clue it can help." Mitch responded to Josh's question and allowed himself to become involved in the conversation, hoping that the feeling would by some chance disappear.

"Okay, yes it was during a date with Mitch."

At that moment Mabel started crying from the high chair she had been sitting in and Bec stood up to attend to her. Picking her up she quickly determined that the child's nappy needed changing so picked up the pink and purple spotted bag and walked off in the direction of the parents room leaving Mitch and Josh alone.

"Bec's very persistent isn't she?" Josh asked.

"Persistent's one word for it." Mitch replied.

"Why is she so keen to find out what happened on one of my dates?"

"I think it might be the journalist in her, you know, investigating something until you find out what happened."

"Is she likely to give up?"

"No, she'll either figure it out or you'll give up and tell her, it's how things usually go."

"Great."

"Even if she does find out what happened she'd never tell anyone else. I've told her heaps of things I don't want other people to know and she's always kept them to herself, never even told Shaun."

"You two are pretty close, aren't you?"

"Yeah we are, apart from Pat she's probably my best friend."

"You're really lucky to have someone like her in your corner."

"I am."

Mitch smiled as he turned back to face the field, a couple of minutes later Bec came back and placed Mabel in the high chair before resuming her seat in between Josh and Mitch. The next half an hour passed and things seemed to be looking better for the Australians, they had formed a partnership and were gathering runs at a reasonable rate. Mitch could feel the anxiety and worry in his stomach start to fade slightly but just as he thought everything was going to get better, bam, the fourth wicket fell for Australia and they were back into the hole Mitch thought they had somehow worked themselves out of. 

The fifth wicket fell in the same over and it seemed that hope was quickly fading, if they couldn't post a decent score then they wouldn't win, and that was something which wasn't sitting well with Mitch and was causing the feeling he thought he had managed to shake to cement itself in the pit of his stomach. It wasn't long until the sixth wicket fell and Pat was walking out to the middle, in a way Mitch was grateful because it meant he could focus all of his attention on his boyfriend rather than the gnawing sensation in his stomach. Just as play was about to start again and Pat was getting ready to face his first ball Bec leaned over towards Mitch and spoke quietly,

"So you know how Pat's always saying that he can't bat to save his life, is he being serious?"

"He thinks that he can't but he isn't actually that bad, he just needs to get into a rhythm and he'll be okay."

Bec smiled as she leaned back and resumed watching the match. Pat didn't get into a rhythm, he didn't really have the chance to, he was out for six and whatever slim hope there was for the Australians to turn this around was fading by the minute. Pat getting out meant that Mitch didn't really have anything to focus on anymore and the anxious feeling which had ingrained itself into his stomach was now slowly rising up into his chest.

Mitch Starc was next in after Pat and it seemed that he and Steve were forming a reasonable partnership that would make it slightly more challenging for England to chase down. But like the majority of the innings had panned out another wicket fell, this one in the form of a spectacular run out that even Mitch thought he should applaud, he didn't though. Things pretty much went to shit from that point on, the very next ball Mitch was out and the next over Australia had been bowled out for two hundred and twenty three. It wasn't like it was an impossible total to defend, they had done in before this tournament, but there was that ever present feeling inside of Mitch that told him everything was going to crumble into a heap.

"Well, the only good thing about this situation is that now it's lunch time." Bec said as she snapped Mitch from his swirl of thoughts. 

"How is that a good thing?" Josh asked.

"The food they provide us with at these grounds is incredible, nothing really compares to Lord's, but it's still fantastic."

"Okay then, can't wait to try it."

Josh and Bec both stood up, "Are you coming Mitch?" Bec asked looking down at him.

"You guys go, I'll get something after."

"Cool, can you watch Mabel then?"

"Yep."

Mitch smiled and Bec and Josh walked over to the table in the back corner of the room which was now covered with platters of food. Ten minutes later they had come back and much like everyone else in the room were sitting with plates in front of them eating and involved in a conversation. Mitch was now wondering around the table and examining the rather large dish positioned in the middle, butter chicken, not exactly something he was overly fond of but he needed something, anything, to take away the anxiety which over the past few hours had become a permanent fixture. Grabbing a plate and filling it until it was full, Mitch grabbed a fork and spoon and walked off in the direction of the bathrooms, he made his way into what was a small storage room and shut the door behind him, making sure he locked it before sitting on a wooden crate and starting to shovel the food into his mouth.

A short time later Mitch was unlocking the door and walking back out to the main room, noticing everybody was still involved in their conversations, including Bec and Josh, he placed his plate in the pile with all the rest and turned around once again and walked back in the direction of the bathrooms. This time he turned to his right and entered the male bathroom, it was surprisingly nice and the charcoal coloured tiles felt cool under his knees as he knelt down in front of the toilet and lifted the lid. He brought his fingers to his throat and as he did allowed the food he had just eaten to fall into the bowl beneath, he continued until he was sure there was nothing left.

As he lifted his head up Mitch opened his eyes and glanced down into the bowl beneath his face, throughout the undigested food he had just brought up he could see an abundance of bright red spots, blood. Quickly moving so he was able to flush the toilet, Mitch did so and stood up shutting the lid, he moved over to the basin in the room and washed his hands before splashing water on his face. He allowed himself to panic for only the briefest of moments before rationalising with himself, Pat was about to bowl in the biggest and most important innings of Australia's World Cup campaign and that was where his focus and attention needed to be.

***

Mitch was slowly walking back across the room to where Bec and Josh were sitting side by side looking out at the field on which the Australian players were walking out and getting ready to start the second innings, he took a deep breath and a moment to compose himself before sitting down in the vacant seat next to Bec. He looked out onto the field and could see the players taking their positions as the England openers walked out, he felt himself getting lost in a daze and was brought back to earth by Bec lightly tapping his shoulder.

"I was thinking that you and Pat should come out to dinner with me, Shaun and the kids tonight, as a celebration." Bec said.

"What happens if they don't win?" Mitch replied.

"We can still go, we'll just be celebrating what a great tournament it was and how well they played throughout."

"Okay yeah, I'm sure Pat will be up for that."

"Good." Bec smiled as she turned back to the front and looked out at the field where play had just gotten underway.

There were some days as a batsman or team in cricket where things just went your way, whether it was a bunch of bad balls or you were just in form, some days everything went right and you knew you could post any score or chase down any total, and much to Australia's detriment, England's day seemed to be today. From the first ball they were stating their intentions, scoring runs where Australia couldn't and forming a decent partnership, pretty soon the score was at fifty and England hadn't lost any wickets. Ball after ball they continued to score runs and it seemed that this match and Australia's World Cup campaign was going to be over pretty quickly causing the feeling that had momentarily disappeared to not only once again settle in Mitch's stomach, but rise into his chest and consume his every thought.

The runs just kept coming, no matter how much Mitch wished and prayed they would stop, England had now not only reached the hundred mark but the hundred partnership and Australia's loss now seemed inevitable. Another couple of overs passed and Mitch Starc was bowling once again, his over started the same as the majority of the other overs the Australian's had bowled, with England scoring runs. It was the third delivery of the over that had Bairstow trapped in front and the umpire's finger raised, a waste of a review later he was walking off the field with thirty four runs to his name, Australia had their first wicket, and it only took one hundred and twenty four runs to get it.

"So if that was Mitch's twenty seventh wicket, doesn't that mean he's now the outright record holder for most wickets in a single World Cup?" Bec asked as she turned to Josh.

"Yeah." Josh replied as he turned to face her.

"Well that's a good thing right? He should be happy about that."

"Considering he said it would mean shit all to get the record unless they won the tournament I don't think he'll be as happy as he should be."

"That kinda sucks."

"It does. Am I still catching a ride with you guys back to the hotel?"

"Yeah."

"Cool. Can we by any chance stop at a supermarket?"

"Yeah we can, why?"

"I figure this record breaking occasion deserves at least a box of chocolates."

"That's so sweet." Bec said with a smile.

"Yeah well no one can ever say I'm not a good boyfriend."

"That they can't." Bec turned to Mitch who was entirely focused on the field in front of him. "Pat's doing really well too." 

"Hmm?" Mitch said as he snapped from his current state.

"I said Pat's doing really well."

"Yeah I guess he is."

"You've been awfully quiet and distant since lunch, are you alright?"

"I'm not really feeling that great."

Mitch turned to face Bec and she observed his features closely before speaking, "You are looking a little pale. Maybe you should go and get some fresh air, it might make you feel a little better."

"I'll come with you if you want Mitch, I don't really feel like watching this onslaught any more than I have to." Josh said.

"Nah, it's all good, I might just go and get a glass of water, I'll be right back."

Mitch looked at Bec before standing up, as he did he could feel the room start to spin, he took a minute to regain his balance before he walked across and to the back of the room where there was a table with multiple glasses and a jug of water. He filled a glass half full and moved so his back was leaning against the rendered wall, a motion which he hoped would counteract the rate at which the room felt like it was spinning. He took small sips of the water from the glass and could feel his throat burn more with each one, part of him thought that drinking the water would somehow help push down the feeling of anxiety which had consumed his entire body, that part of him was wrong.

As he finished sipping the water from the glass he placed it down on the table and as he looked back up could only see a blurred version of the room in front of him. Quickly closing his eyes he kept them shut for a few moments and when they opened the room was clear again, making the most of this, Mitch went about slowly and carefully walking back to the front of the room where Bec and Josh were seated and sat down in his own seat.

When he looked back out at the field he could see that Pat was bowling again and so focused his attention on that rather than the burning sensation in his throat and chest. England were still scoring runs and halfway through Pat's over it seemed like it was going to be an expensive one, that was until there was an almighty shout from the Australian's and after a rather extended period of time the umpire's finger was raised, Australia had got their second wicket of the innings, much to the disgust of Roy who was adamant he had gotten no bat to the ball, but with no reviews left he was forced to walk. England were now two for one hundred and forty seven and needed less than eighty runs to win the match and move into the final.

As hard as Australia was trying the runs just kept on coming, at one point a single over went for twenty one and victory was all but in England's hands. Nobody in the room had anything to say, nobody knew what to say and the only sound that could be heard was the kids playing like they had been since the match started all those hours ago. Pretty soon England were within ten runs of victory and a berth in the 2019 Cricket World Cup Final, the margin continued to narrow until they only needed one run to secure victory and avenge their group stage defeat to the Australian's, they hit the ball for four. The room stayed silent but you could hear the cheers of the England crowd and the genuine belief that this was their tournament to win, this was the tournament they were going to win. After five or so minutes the silence in the room had disappeared and everyone had broken into a steady chatter.

"Well, even though we lost the match, today wasn't a complete failure." Bec said in a tone that was half deflated and half optimistic.

"You think?" Josh replied.

"Yeah, I mean Steve sort of saved us with the bat, without him that score would have been a lot lower, and Pat and Mitch did alright with the ball."

"It was a flop Bec."

"Okay, even if today wasn't exactly a success the tournament as a whole was pretty good."

"I won't argue with you there."

The conversation between Bec and Josh was fading into the background. Mitch could feel the room spinning and he was desperately trying to find something to focus on to make it stop. He searched for Pat on the field but could feel his head getting heavier and heavier as he did. The last thing he saw was a sea of yellow and blue merging together before darkness overcame him and he was falling face first onto the wooden floor.

Hearing the thud Bec turned to her left, "Oh my god Mitch!" She said as she quickly dropped to her knees and placed both of her hands on the back of his shoulders. "Josh call an ambulance." She said without looking away.

Josh quickly pulled his phone out from his pocket and started dialling, "Ambulance please." He said after a few moments, his eyes firmly fixated on Bec and Mitch on the ground.

"It's gonna be okay Mitch." Bec said softly as she ran a hand through his hair, "It's all going to be okay."


	12. Revelations

**Thirty four months ago**

"It wasn't Shaun." Bec said as she unlocked and opened the front door and walked inside the house.

"It was." Shaun replied as he walked in behind her and shut the door.

"You expect me to believe that someone that famous was sitting out in the open in a movie theatre in Perth?"

"Well if it wasn't him whoever it was should get a job as a professional impersonator because they look identical."

Bec laughed and shook her head as she placed her keys down on the side table in the entrance, "Mitch we're home." She called out but no response came, "We left Austin at mum and dads, he was sleeping." Still no response, "Mitch?"

"Maybe he's gone out." 

"His car's still in the driveway. Mitch?" Bec was now walking through to the living room with Shaun behind her and when they stepped into the room they noticed the television was on but Mitch wasn't in the room.

"He's probably just in the bathroom."

"Yeah you're probably right. Did you want a tea?"

"Yeah thanks."

Shaun went about sitting on the sofa and changing the channel whilst Bec walked the short distance to the kitchen and moved behind the bench. "Oh my god!" She yelled as she saw an unconscious Mitch lying face down on the floor and knelt down beside him.

"What?" Shaun asked as he turned around to look over the back of the couch where Bec was on the ground next to Mitch.

"Call an ambulance quickly."

Shaun turned back around and reached for his phone he had placed on the coffee table only a couple of minutes earlier, dialling he brought the phone to his ear and turned around again so he was looking at Bec and Mitch, concern all over his face. Ten minutes later the ambulance had arrived and not to long after that Mitch was being wheeled out the door on the bed and placed in the back of the ambulance which drove off in the direction of the hospital with Bec and Shaun following diligently in their car.

Quite a while later Bec and Shaun were sitting side by side in the hospital waiting room, the room was quiet and they were the only two in it, a stark contrast to the rest of the hospital. Bec was looking down at the empty cup she had gotten from the water cooler in the corner of the room and had started to nervously pick at the edges.

"Why is it taking so long? It shouldn't be taking this long." Bec said as she looked at Shaun.

"I don't know sweetheart."

"We've been sitting here for hours and no one's told us anything."

"They're probably just trying to figure out what's going on. They'll come and talk to us when they know something."

"He's been off for weeks Shaun. What if he's seriously sick?"

"We're not going to know anything until we talk to the doctor, don't let your mind jump to the worst case scenario."

Shaun allowed his hand to find Bec's and they sat together in silence. An hour later they hadn't moved and didn't notice when someone appeared in the doorway and started walking towards them.

"Mr and Mrs Marsh?" A blonde haired man, probably in his mid to late twenties, said as he approached the two of them.

"Yeah that's us." Shaun said as he and Bec looked at the man.

"If you'd like to follow me."

The man gestured to them both and started walking out the door and led them through the hospital corridors to a small office on the opposite end of the floor, once the door shut behind them the man proceeded to speak,

"I'm Doctor Campbell."

"Shaun." He said as he reached to shake the doctors outstretched hand.

"Rebecca." She did the same. "So what's happening with Mitch? Do you know why he collapsed?"

"Why don't we take a seat."

The doctor gestured to the desk and while he sat behind it, Bec and Shaun sat in the two seats in front of it. Once they were all seated the doctor pulled a file up on his computer before turning back to the rather worried looking Bec and Shaun and continuing to speak,

"Mitch's blood work shows that his iron levels are extremely low, that's probably the most likely explanation behind his collapse."

"Okay, but you can do something for that right?" Bec spoke.

"Yes, we've set up an iron transfusion, he's receiving it at the moment."

"That's good, so he'll be okay in a couple of hours? Once he's had it?" The doctor frowned and any relief Bec felt quickly disappeared.

"After we took the blood samples we did a further examination to see if we could find out why his iron levels were so low. We found that his gums are quite receded so we decided to do an endoscopy, which is just where we put a small camera down his throat to have a look. This revealed that his oesophagus is significantly inflamed and there are a few small tears to the lining which should heal on their own in time."

"Okay." Bec spoke cautiously, "What does that mean."

The doctor paused for a moment and looked at Bec and Shaun, "In my experience, a combination of these symptoms usually only results from one thing, I believe that Mitch is suffering from bulimia."

"Bulimia? As in the thing teenage girls get when they think they're fat?" Shaun spoke up.

"Anyone can be affected. It usually results from and inability to deal with and process emotions and feelings." The doctor once again paused for a moment before continuing, "Have you noticed Mitch eating less lately? Avoiding situations where he would have to eat with people?"

Shaun swallowed and brought his hand to grasp Bec's, "I guess he hasn't been eating with us lately."

"What do we do now?" Bec intervened.

"It's gotten to a pretty serious stage so he's going to need to stay in hospital for a little while. After that he'll need to see a counsellor and we can discuss different treatment options."

"Can we see him."

"We had to sedate him so we could do the endoscopy so he's still unconscious, but I'll show you to his room so you can be with him."

"Thank you."

"It's not a problem. We can discuss how best to treat this in a couple of days but if you have any questions between now and then please don't hesitate to ask any of the doctors or nurses."

"We won't."

The doctor smiled as the three of them stood up and shook hands before walking towards and out of the door. Once they were in the hallway the doctor led them towards the ward Mitch was staying in,  they arrived outside his room and the doctor opened the door before giving Bec and Shaun a smile and leaving them alone outside the room. They held hands and allowed their grasps to tighten before stepping into the room.

**Present Day**

"Mrs Marsh?" A woman with a British accent said as she approached where Bec was sitting alone in one of the hospital waiting rooms.

"Yes." Bec replied as she looked up at the woman.

"Okay, if you'd like to come through to my office."

Bec smiled as she reached down to pick up her bag and followed the woman out the waiting room and through the halls until they reached a door a couple of hundred metres away. Upon entering the room there was a desk on the far side of the room which the woman promptly went to sit at and gestured for Bec to sit in one of the seats beside.

"So I'm Doctor Crawford, I've been attending to Mitchell."

"Rebecca, I'm his sister in law."

The doctor smiled before opening a file on the computer and reading something before turning back to face Bec. "I've been reading Mitchell's medical records and noticed that about two and a half years ago he was admitted to hospital because of a similar collapse."

"Yes, he was."

"And the doctor treating him at the time, a Doctor Campbell, determined that the cause of this collapse was a deficiency of iron which came about as a result of Mitchell suffering from bulimia."

Bec felt her heart and stomach sink as the doctor spoke, "That's right."

"Right. So we examined Mitchell and found that he has quite a few of the same symptoms he had when he was admitted two and a half years ago, his oesophagus is drastically inflamed and the lining has some tears, there are also a significant amount of sores in his mouth and throat."

"Alright." Bec said with a shaky voice.

"I think you might know where I'm leading with this, based on all the information we have, it's highly probable and my medical opinion that Mitchell has suffered a relapse."

Bec felt her heart sink to the ground when those words came out of the doctor's mouth and she allowed herself time to absorb the information. "Okay. So what happens now?" She said after a couple of minutes.

"We won't know the full extent of the situation until Mitchell regains consciousness, we sedated him for the examination so he was as comfortable as possible. The only thing we are slightly concerned about are the tears to the lining of the oesophagus, they are quite large so they may not heal on their own, but that's something we'll observe over the next couple of days."

"Right. Can I see him?"

"We're still running a few tests at the moment but when that's finished a nurse will come and get you from the waiting room."

"Okay. Thank you."

"It's not a problem. When Mitchell wakes up I'll come and talk to you both."

The doctor smiled as both she and Bec stood up and walked over to the door, Bec left the room alone and heard the door shut behind her as she started walking through the hallways and back to the empty waiting room, she sat down on the same chair she had been sitting in earlier and momentarily closed her eyes. Fifteen minutes later Bec was still sitting alone in the waiting room staring at the wall ahead when she heard footsteps getting closer and closer, she looked over towards the door and saw Shaun walking towards her followed closely by Pat.

"Bec!" Shaun said as he approached her and pulled her into a hug.

"Hey." Bec said as she pulled back and looked at Shaun. "Um, the kids are with Josh, he and Mitch are going to take them back to the hotel."

"Yeah he found me before we left. Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, a little shaken, but fine."

"What's going on Bec? Where's Mitch?" Pat asked with obvious concern in his voice.

"They admitted him, he's through that way." Bec gestured in the direction of the wards.

"Can I go and see him?"

"Not at the moment, he's sedated and they're still running tests, a nurse is going to come and get us when we can go in."

"Have you spoken to a doctor? Do they know what's wrong with him yet?"

"Yeah they think that they do."

"What is it?" The worry was evident in Pat's voice and face but Bec couldn't find the words to speak.

"Bec?" Shaun prompted as he looked her in the eye and she took a breath.

"Do you remember what I was worried about a couple of months ago, but you told me everything was probably fine?"

"Yeah and you agreed that nothing was going on."

"Everything wasn't fine."

"Oh no."

"Can someone please tell me what's going on? Why is Mitch in hospital?" Pat interrupted.

"He collapsed." Bec said in a quiet voice.

"Collapsed? Why?"

Bec tried to speak but the words alluded her and she was about to break into tears, something Shaun noticed, "Why don't we go down to the cafeteria and get some coffees?" He spoke to Pat.

"I don't want coffee, I just want to know what's happening."

"I know and I'll tell you, but I can't carry three coffees back here by myself and we need them, we have no idea how long we're going to have to wait before they'll let us in and you've just spent most of the day playing cricket."

"Okay fine I'll come."

"Will you be alright here by yourself?" Shaun asked Bec.

"I'll be fine."

"Alright, see you in a bit."

Pat started to walk towards the door of the waiting room and Bec gave Shaun a sad but knowing look to which he nodded in response and turned around to catch up to Pat, once he did the two walked in the direction of the cafeteria leaving Bec to resume her seat and wait.

***

"What did you want?" Shaun asked Pat as the two walked through the entrance to the cafeteria and towards the counter.

"For someone to tell me why my boyfriend's in hospital." Pat retaliated.

"Right then. Why don't you go and sit at one of those tables over there and I'll order."

Pat sighed as he wandered over to a table in the corner of the room and sat in one of the two seats. Ten minutes later Shaun had joined him and a waitress was placing a mug of coffee in front of Pat and another in front of Shaun as well as a plate with a rather large chocolate muffin on it in the centre of the table before smiling and walking off in the direction of the kitchen.

"I thought we were getting the coffees to go and taking them back to Bec." Pat stated as he looked at Shaun.

"Yeah we were, but I thought that the two of us could have a chat here." Shaun replied.

"And what's the muffin in aid of?"

"I thought you might be hungry, and even if you're not you have to eat."

The two of them sat in silence for the next five minutes, both of them slowly drinking their coffee and Pat picking away at the side of the muffin closest to him. Eventually Pat looked at Shaun and spoke, "Is Mitch seriously sick Shaun? Is that why you dragged me down here to talk? So you could break it to me with coffee and a muffin?"

"He's not well no, but it's probably not as bad as what you're thinking." Shaun replied.

"Okay, so tell me what's going on."

"It's hard to explain Pat."

"Well try, because I need to know, I deserve to know why my boyfriend's in hospital."

"I know."

"Right. So let me ask you a simpler question, what was Bec worried about a couple of months ago?"

Shaun paused for a moment and earned a stern look from Pat, he took a breath before answering, "She thought Mitch might be binging again." He said figuring that Pat would most likely appreciate him being direct as opposed to beating around the bush.

"Binging? As in eating a whole heap of food and then making yourself throw it back up?" Pat said with a sceptical tone.

"Yes."

"Why would Mitch be binging?" Pat's tone hadn't changed.

"Because he has bulimia."

"Bulimia?" Pat was still speaking in a sceptical tone and said this with a laugh.

"Yes."

"What possible reason could Mitch have to want to make himself throw up?"

"It was three years ago Pat, he was dealing with a lot of stuff and he wasn't coping, so he started to binge, and then he kept binging, until it got to the stage where Bec and I came home from the movies one night and found him collapsed on the kitchen floor. The doctor at the hospital said that based on all the symptoms he had he was suffering from bulimia, and it took a while but eventually he admitted it."

Pat looked Shaun in the eye, "You're wrong."

"I know this isn't what you were expecting me to say and it's a lot to take in, but denying it isn't going to help the situation."

"What situation? So Mitch had bulimia three years ago, that doesn't explain why he's in hospital now." 

"Yes it does, he's had a relapse Pat."

"Why would he do that? What reason does he have to want to do that to himself?"

"I don't know, but he's been through a lot the past nine months, it probably just all got on top of him and that was his way of coping."

Pat remained silent and allowed everything he had just been told to sink into his brain as he looked down at the mug in front of him, he felt his heart sink at the thought that Mitch had been struggling so much and he hadn't even noticed something was seriously wrong. After a couple of minutes he looked back up at Shaun and made a desperate attempt to keep the tears that were starting to build in his eyes at bay.

"I understand how you feel Pat, I was the same when the doctor first told me and Bec." Shaun said softly.

"I don't think you do." Pat replied.

Shaun waited for a moment before speaking, "Why don't we get Bec her coffee and then go back to the waiting room yeah? That way when we can go and see Mitch we'll be ready."

"Fine."

Pat and Shaun both stood up from where they were sitting and while Shaun wandered over to the counter to order Bec's coffee, Pat walked over to the door and stood outside while he waited. Five minutes later Shaun had a take away coffee cup in his hand and the two of them started walking in silence back in the direction of the waiting room. When they got to the room Pat immediately walked to the opposite side of the room and sat by himself in a chair with his arms crossed across his chest. Shaun walked over to where Bec was sitting in the same chair she had been when they left, she had her phone to her ear and as Shaun sat down next to her.

"I have to go Josh but I'll talk to you when we get back later tonight. I will. Okay bye." Bec said as she ended the call and put her phone in her bag before turning to face Shaun. "Josh and Mitch have the kids back at the hotel."

"Good, are they okay?" Shaun responded.

"Yeah they're fine." Bec looked over at Pat, "Did you talk to him?" She lowered her voice as she turned back.

"Yeah I did."

"You told him everything?"

"Yeah."

"How did he take it?"

"Not well at first, he was in denial about it."

"Well it's a pretty big thing to hear about the person you love, it's going to take time for him to accept it, like it did for us."

"I know."

Shaun and Bec smiled at each other before turning and looking at Pat who was facing the wall and still had his arms crossed against his chest, Bec took a breath before she spoke softly, "Are you alright Pat?"

"I don't want to talk to you Bec."

"Why?"

Pat lifted his head and looked at Bec and Shaun, "You, both of you, have known about this massive thing that's happened in Mitch's life, and in the entire two years we've been together neither of you told me."

"It wasn't our place to tell you Pat." 

"Really? That's the excuse you're going with?"

"It's not an excuse. We tried to convince Mitch to tell you himself but he was adamant that he didn't want you to know."

"Mitch didn't want me to know?" 

"No. He was convinced that if you knew what he had been through in the year before you got together you'd just cut and run."

"I would never do that. I love him." Pat sounded hurt when he spoke.

"We know that, but it was his decision whether to tell you or not and we couldn't go against his wishes."

"Alright, but when you noticed something might be happening again you should have told me."

"That was my fault Pat, I convinced her that nothing was going on." Shaun inserted himself into the conversation.

"And I only thought it for a day at most, after that he was his usual self and I didn't worry about it." Bec followed on.

"I'm sorry, but you two have had two whole years to tell me what had happened with Mitch and you chose not to."

The room fell silent after that comment and the sound of footsteps approaching the door to the waiting room could now be heard. At the entrance appeared a tall brown haired nurse who spoke and caused all three of them to look towards the door.

"Sorry to interrupt, are you Mitchell's family?"

"Yes we are." Shaun said.

"Okay. If you come with me you can see him now."

The nurse smiled and Shaun and Bec looked over to Pat, "Come on Pat, let's just go and see Mitch." Bec said softly.

"No, I think I want to go in by myself, I can't be in the same room as either of you at the moment."

With that Pat stood up and walked over to where the nurse was standing, he shook her hand and the two disappeared into the hallway. Bec turned to face Shaun and the two met eyes before she rested her head on his shoulder and felt a tear roll down her cheek.

***

Pat was walking through the halls of the hospital floor they were on with the nurse that had come to get him from the waiting room beside him in silence. They had been walking for a couple of minutes and eventually came to a stop in front of one of the many doors in the hallway of the ward they were in.

"He's just in here, now he's still asleep at the moment but he should be coming around in the next half hour or so." The nurse said as she turned to face Pat.

"Thank you." Pat replied with a smile.

The nurse placed a comforting hand on his shoulder and smiled before walking off down the remainder of the hallway and leaving him alone outside the door. Pat took a deep breath before reaching his arm out and grasping the handle and opening the door. When he stepped inside he was immediately met with a cold gush of air from the air conditioner and the clinical setting of the room which was being filled by the faint beeping of the heart monitor.

As he closed the door behind him Pat stepped further into the room and turned to his left, when he did he saw the hospital bed Mitch was lying in. He looked pale, there was an oxygen mask placed over his nose and mouth, a cannula inserted into the back of his right hand which was connected to a drip, and the clothes he was wearing that morning had been replaced by the white hospital gown he was wearing now.

Pat was quickly becoming overwhelmed at the sight and could feel tears start to well in his eyes, he blinked them back and moved around the foot of the bed to sit in the chair which was placed on the left hand side. As he sat he took a few minutes to observe the sight in front of him, he felt his phone vibrating in the pocket of his pants and pulled it out and allowed the screen to illuminate as he read the message which appeared.

_[Mitch S]: Josh told me what happened with Mitch. If you need anything at all just call me._

Pat sighed as he held the button down on the side of his phone and turned it completely off before putting it back in his pocket and bringing both his hands to clasp Mitch's left hand which was lying on the bed. The only thing he needed at the moment was to be alone with Mitch and to take care of him, because at the end of the day, Mitch had always looked after Pat, now Pat was going to look after him.

**Nineteen months ago**

Mitch was getting more and more worried by the minute, he had been standing and knocking on the door of Pat's hotel room for the past ten minutes and there had been no answer. It was concerning, because Pat usually always answered the door within ten seconds of hearing a knock no matter who it was, and Mitch knew that he had to be in the room because he wasn't anywhere else. He continued to knock for another five minutes and by the end of that seriously considered breaking into the room. Just as he was about to turn away he heard the door open and saw Pat, he was as white as a sheet and was slightly doubled over with one hand supporting his weight against the door frame and the other clutched over his stomach.

"Mitch, hey." Pat said in a croaky voice, "What are you doing here?"

"You weren't answering your phone. Are you alright?"

"Yeah I'm-" Pat paused as he quickly brought his hand from the door frame and cupped it over his mouth, turning around and practically running back into the room Pat disappeared and Mitch heard what he presumed was the bathroom door slam shut. He walked into the room himself shutting the front door behind him before walking over to the closed door to the bathroom and knocking softly.

"Pat? You good?"

There was no response which concerned Mitch but he decided it would be best if he just sat and waited, he turned around and went to sit on the bed which looked like someone had been sleeping in it already. Twenty minutes later the sound of the toilet flushing filled the room, the bathroom door opened and a dishevelled looking Pat walked over to the foot of the bed where Mitch looked up from his phone and at his boyfriend's face.

"Sorry." Pat said quietly.

"It's fine. What's going on?" Mitch responded, voice full of worry and concern.

"I don't feel good."

"You don't look good either."

"Thanks."

"Just stating facts. So when did you start feeling sick?"

"I haven't been feeling one hundred percent all day but it's only come on in force these past two hours."

"Why didn't you call me?"

"I haven't really had the opportunity."

"Right. Point taken." Mitch stood up off the bed and walked over to the chest of drawers in the room, he opened the first one and pulled out a pair of Pat's undies and shut it before opening the second drawer and pulling out the pair of pyjamas which were on top and walking back over to Pat. "Okay first things first, go and have a shower." Mitch handed Pat the clothes.

"Okay."

Mitch walked to the bedside table and picked up Pat's room key before walking over to the door.

"Where are you going?" Pat asked.

"Just back to my room to get something, have a shower and I'll be straight back."

Mitch smiled as Pat slowly walked back into the bathroom and shut the door, he waited for the sound of water running to fill the room before he left the room and walked in the direction of his. Fifteen minutes later Mitch was standing at the kitchenette bench in Pat's room when the sound of the water running came to a stop and a couple of minutes later the bathroom door was opening and Pat was walking out and over to Mitch in his pyjamas.

"Drink this." Mitch handed Pat a glass full of orange liquid as he came to a stop in front of him.

"Not until you tell me what it is." Pat sounded tired yet still managed to mount an argument.

"Relax I'm not trying to poison you, it's hydralyte."

Pat brought the glass to his mouth and drank the liquid, when he pulled the glass back he gave Mitch a sour look, "That's disgusting."

"It's not supposed to taste nice. Now get into bed."

Pat didn't argue, he handed the glass back to Mitch and walked over to the side of the bed where the blankets were pulled back and climbed into it. Mitch rinsed out the glass and left it on the bench before he picked up one of the chairs that were at the table and carried it over to the side of the bed Pat was lying in. Sitting down in the chair, Mitch leaned over and placed a kiss to Pat's rather warm forehead and smiled as he pulled back and leaned back into the chair. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and focused on that as Pat closed his eyes and drifted into sleep.

The night hadn't been particularly great, Pat had spent a fair chunk of it in the bathroom and Mitch had ended up sleeping with a pillow on the sofa in the room because Pat was adamant he couldn't get in the bed in case he got sick as well. Now it was morning and the two of them were sitting side by side on the team bus driving to the MCG for the second day of play in the fourth test. 

"You should be back at the hotel in bed. Not playing a full day of test cricket." Mitch said as he faced Pat.

"I played yesterday and I didn't feel well." Pat retaliated.

"Yesterday you hadn't spent half the night in front of or on a toilet."

"I'm fine Mitch, I'll be okay."

"Yeah well if I see you looking sick at all I'm going to forcibly drag you off the field and into the medics room."

"Please don't do that."

"Okay, but just promise me that if you start to feel any worse than you do now you'll tell Steve and go off the field."

"I promise. You worry about me too much."

"It's because I love you so much."

"Well I love you too."

Mitch and Pat smiled at each other and allowed their hands to entwine before looking back to the front of the bus and shifting their focus to the day of play that awaited them.

**Present Day**

Pat was leaned forward and resting his chin on the side of the bed, his thumb was stroking the back of Mitch's hand which he hadn't let go of since he sat in the chair. He was still dressed in his Cricket Australia gear and it wasn't particularly comfortable but that didn't matter, nothing mattered at the moment, nothing but staying right by Mitch's side and looking after him. 

"Pat?"

A dreary and quiet voice spoke, Pat quickly straightened and looked up to where Mitch had his eyes open and was using his free hand to remove the oxygen mask from his face and bring it down to rest on the front of his neck.

"Hey, I'm here." Pat smiled as he felt relief fill his veins.

Mitch stayed silent for a few moments before speaking again, "The match, you lost."

"Yeah we did."

"You should be with the team."

"No. I'm where I want to be." Pat tightened his grip on Mitch's hand. 

"Is Bec here?"

"Yeah, Shaun too, they're just out in the waiting room."

"The kids?"

"Josh and Mitch have them back at the hotel. I can only imagine that it's going to turn into some strange version of daddy daycare."

Mitch laughed softly but it quickly turned into a cough and a pained expression came onto his face.

"Hey are you alright? What's wrong?" Pat asked his voice filled with concern.

"My throat."

"Did you want me to go and get a doctor?"

"No."

"Okay."

"I collapsed didn't I?"

"Yeah you did."

Mitch's face said that he knew what had happened and he paused for another moment, "Do you know what happened?"

"Not today. But Shaun told me everything that happened before we got together."

"I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"For being like this. For not telling you."

"Hey, no, you have nothing to be sorry about." Pat tightened his grip on Mitch's hand once again and the two looked each other in the eye.

"If you want to leave-"

"Why would I leave?"

"This isn't what you signed up for when we got together."

"Two years ago we promised each other that we'd stick together no matter what. If you think I'm about to up and run because this happened then you've got another thing coming."

Mitch smiled and Pat did the same, the two sat in silence for the next couple of minutes until Pat noticed Mitch's eyes starting to drift shut and then open again.

"You're tired, you should sleep." Pat said.

"I'm fine."

"It's okay Mitch. I'll be right here when you wake up."

"I love you."

Pat smiled as he stood up and helped put the oxygen mask back on Mitch's face and fixed the blankets around him, sitting back down he once again took hold of his boyfriend's hand and held it tightly.

"I love you too."

And with those words Mitch's eyes closed and he drifted back to sleep. Pat remained sitting in silence just watching over his boyfriend sleep, this wasn't how he had expected his World Cup campaign to end, but know that it had he knew one thing for sure, there was no way he was leaving Mitch's side, they were going to get through all of this, together.


End file.
